2008–09 Premier League

The 2008–09 Premier League (known as the Barclays Premier League for sponsorship reasons) was the 17th season since the establishment of the Premier League in 1992. Manchester United became champions for the 11th time on the penultimate weekend of the season, defending their crown after winning their tenth Premier League title on the final day of the previous season. They were run close by Liverpool, who had a better goal difference and who had beaten United home and away, including a 4–1 victory at Old Trafford, but who were undone by a series of draws. The campaign – the fixtures for which were announced on 16 June 2008 – began on Saturday, 16 August 2008,[2] and ended on 24 May 2009. A total of 20 teams contested the league, consisting of 17 who competed in the previous season and three promoted from the Football League Championship. The new match ball was the Nike T90 Omni.

Premier League
Season2008–09
Dates16 August 2008 – 24 May 2009
ChampionsManchester United
11th Premier League title
18th English title
RelegatedNewcastle United
Middlesbrough
West Bromwich Albion
Champions LeagueManchester United
Liverpool
Chelsea
Arsenal
Europa LeagueEverton
Aston Villa
Fulham
Matches played380
Goals scored942 (2.48 per match)
Top goalscorerNicolas Anelka (19 goals)
Biggest home winManchester City 6–0 Portsmouth
(21 September 2008)
Biggest away winHull City 0–5 Wigan Athletic
(30 August 2008)
Middlesbrough 0–5 Chelsea
(18 October 2008)
West Bromwich Albion 0–5 Manchester United
(27 January 2009)
Highest scoringArsenal 4–4 Tottenham Hotspur
(29 October 2008)
Liverpool 4–4 Arsenal
(21 April 2009)
Longest winning run11 games[1]
Manchester United
Longest unbeaten run21 games[1]
Arsenal
Longest winless run14 games[1]
Middlesbrough
Longest losing run6 games[1]
Blackburn Rovers
Hull City
Highest attendance75,569
Manchester United v Liverpool
(14 March 2009)
Lowest attendance14,169
Wigan Athletic v West Ham United
(4 March 2009)
Average attendance35,650

At the start of this season, clubs were allowed to name seven substitutes on the bench instead of five.[3] This season was also different in that there was no New Year's Day game, as is traditional. This was because the FA Cup Third Round is traditionally played on the first Saturday in January, which in 2009 fell in the usual spot for New Year's league games.[4] September saw Manchester City taken over by the Abu Dhabi United Group, transforming them into one of the world's wealthiest football clubs, securing the signing of Robinho for a British record £32.5 million just seconds before the 2008 summer transfer window closed in the process.[5]

The first goal of the season was scored by Arsenal's Samir Nasri against newly promoted West Bromwich Albion in the fourth minute of the early kick-off game on the opening day of the season on 16 August.[6] Gabriel Agbonlahor of Aston Villa scored the first hat-trick of the season against Manchester City, scoring three goals in the space of seven minutes.[7] Manchester United clinched the 2009 Premier League title with a scoreless draw against Arsenal on 16 May 2009, their 11th Premier League title, and 18th League title overall, drawing level with fierce rivals Liverpool who finished as runners-up. It is the second time they clinched the title for three consecutive years, the first being in 2001.

West Bromwich Albion were the first team to be relegated to the Championship after losing 2–0 at home to Liverpool on 17 May 2009. They were joined in the Championship by Middlesbrough and Newcastle United on the last day of the season after Middlesbrough's defeat at West Ham United and Newcastle's 1–0 defeat at Aston Villa. It meant that Hull City and Sunderland stayed up despite home defeats to Manchester United and Chelsea respectively. The fact that Hull City avoided relegation (along with Stoke City – who stayed up relatively comfortably under the shrewd stewardship of Tony Pulis), meant it was the first time since the 2005–06 season that more than one promoted club maintained their Premier League status. Aston Villa, Everton and Fulham all secured European football for the 2009–10 season through their league position.[8]

Teams

Twenty teams competed in the league – the top seventeen teams from the previous season and the three teams promoted from the Championship. The promoted teams were West Bromwich Albion, Stoke City (returning to the top flight after absences of two and twenty-three years respectively) and Hull City (playing top flight football for the first time ever). This was also Stoke City's first season in the Premier League. They replaced Reading (ending their two-year top flight spell), Birmingham City and Derby County (both teams relegated after a season's presence).

Stadiums and locations
Locations of the 2008–09 Premier League teams
Greater London Premier League football clubs
Greater Manchester Premier League football clubs
Team Location Stadium Capacity
Arsenal London (Holloway) Emirates Stadium 60,432
Aston Villa Birmingham Villa Park 42,640
Blackburn Rovers Blackburn Ewood Park 31,367
Bolton Wanderers Bolton Reebok Stadium 28,723
Chelsea London (Fulham) Stamford Bridge 42,055
Everton Liverpool (Walton) Goodison Park 40,157
Fulham London (Fulham) Craven Cottage 26,500
Hull City Kingston upon Hull KC Stadium 25,404
Liverpool Liverpool (Anfield) Anfield 45,276[9]
Manchester City Manchester City of Manchester Stadium 47,726
Manchester United Old Trafford Old Trafford 76,212
Middlesbrough Middlesbrough Riverside Stadium 35,100
Newcastle United Newcastle upon Tyne St James' Park 52,387
Portsmouth Portsmouth Fratton Park 20,224
Stoke City Stoke-on-Trent Britannia Stadium 28,000
Sunderland Sunderland Stadium of Light 49,000
Tottenham Hotspur London (Tottenham) White Hart Lane 36,240
West Bromwich Albion West Bromwich The Hawthorns 25,369
West Ham United London (Upton Park) Upton Park 35,303
Wigan Athletic Wigan JJB Stadium 25,138

Personnel and kits

(as of 24 May 2009)

Team Manager Captain Kit manufacturer Shirt sponsor
Arsenal Arsène Wenger Cesc Fàbregas Nike Fly Emirates
Aston Villa Martin O'Neill Martin Laursen Nike Acorns[10]
Blackburn Rovers Sam Allardyce Ryan Nelsen Umbro Crown Paints[11]
Bolton Wanderers Gary Megson Kevin Davies Reebok Reebok
Chelsea Guus Hiddink John Terry Adidas Samsung
Everton David Moyes Phil Neville Umbro Chang
Fulham Roy Hodgson Danny Murphy Nike LG
Hull City Phil Brown Ian Ashbee Umbro Karoo (H) / Kingston Communications (A, 3rd)
Liverpool Rafael Benítez Steven Gerrard Adidas Carlsberg
Manchester City Mark Hughes Richard Dunne Le Coq Sportif Thomas Cook
Manchester United Sir Alex Ferguson Gary Neville Nike AIG
Middlesbrough Gareth Southgate Emmanuel Pogatetz Erreà Garmin
Newcastle United Alan Shearer Nicky Butt Adidas Northern Rock
Portsmouth Paul Hart David James Canterbury Oki
Stoke City Tony Pulis Andy Griffin Le Coq Sportif Britannia
Sunderland Ricky Sbragia Dean Whitehead Umbro Boylesports
Tottenham Hotspur Harry Redknapp Ledley King Puma Mansion.com
Casino & Poker
West Bromwich Albion Tony Mowbray Jonathan Greening Umbro None
West Ham United Gianfranco Zola Matthew Upson Umbro XL Holidays[12] / SBOBET[13]
Wigan Athletic Steve Bruce Mario Melchiot Champion JJB Sports

Also, Nike provided new match balls, white with red and yellow (autumn/spring) and yellow with purple and black (winter), based on their T90 Laser II Omni model.

Managerial changes
Team Outgoing manager Manner of departure Date of vacancy Table Incoming manager Date of appointment
Chelsea Avram Grant Sacked 24 May 2008[14] Pre-season Luiz Felipe Scolari 1 July 2008[15]
Manchester City Sven-Göran Eriksson Mutual consent 2 June 2008[16] Mark Hughes 4 June 2008[17]
Blackburn Rovers Mark Hughes Manchester City purchased rights for £4.6m[18] 4 June 2008[17] Paul Ince 22 June 2008[19]
West Ham United Alan Curbishley Resigned 3 September 2008[20] 5th Gianfranco Zola 11 September 2008[21]
Newcastle United Kevin Keegan 4 September 2008[22] 11th Joe Kinnear 26 September 2008[23]
Tottenham Hotspur Juande Ramos Sacked 25 October 2008[24] 20th Harry Redknapp 26 October 2008[24]
Portsmouth Harry Redknapp Signed by Tottenham 26 October 2008[24] 7th Tony Adams 28 October 2008[25]
Sunderland Roy Keane Resigned 4 December 2008[26] 18th Ricky Sbragia 27 December 2008[27]
Blackburn Rovers Paul Ince Sacked 16 December 2008[28] 19th Sam Allardyce 17 December 2008[29]
Portsmouth Tony Adams 9 February 2009[30] 16th Paul Hart 9 February 2009[30]
Chelsea Luiz Felipe Scolari 9 February 2009[31] 4th Guus Hiddink 11 February 2009[32]
Newcastle United Joe Kinnear Medical break clause 16 February 2009 13th Alan Shearer 31 March 2009[33]
  • ^1 Newcastle United manager Joe Kinnear was originally appointed as interim manager until the end of October on 26 September, signed a one-month contract extension on 24 October, and was named manager until the end of the English football season on 28 November.
  • ^2 Portsmouth caretaker manager Paul Hart was appointed on 9 February. On 3 March chairman Alexandre Gaydamak confirmed the appointment would be until at least the end of the English football season.[34]
  • ^3 Chelsea manager Guus Hiddink remained Russia manager until the end of the English football season, when he left Chelsea and returned to his Russia duties on a full-time basis.
  • ^4 Newcastle United manager Joe Kinnear took leave from Newcastle United following heart bypass surgery on 16 February. His assistants, Chris Hughton and Colin Calderwood, were appointed to serve as caretaker managers until his return, which was understood might not occur before the end of the English football season. On 31 March, Alan Shearer was appointed manager until the end of the season, as Joe Kinnear was not able to return to his Newcastle United duties until the end of the English football season. After the season ended, both Joe Kinnear and Alan Shearer left the club permanently, and Chris Hughton was appointed manager during the course of the following season.
  • ^5 Roberto Martínez was announced to be manager on 9 June, however due to complications surrounding the appointment of backroom staff, the deal was not finalised and officially announced until 15 June.

League table
Pos Team Pld W D L GF GA GD Pts Qualification or relegation
1 Manchester United (C) 38 28 6 4 68 24 +44 90 Qualification for the Champions League group stage[lower-alpha 1]
2 Liverpool 38 25 11 2 77 27 +50 86
3 Chelsea 38 25 8 5 68 24 +44 83
4 Arsenal 38 20 12 6 68 37 +31 72 Qualification for the Champions League play-off round
5 Everton 38 17 12 9 55 37 +18 63 Qualification for the Europa League play-off round[lower-alpha 1]
6 Aston Villa 38 17 11 10 54 48 +6 62
7 Fulham 38 14 11 13 39 34 +5 53 Qualification for the Europa League third qualifying round[lower-alpha 1]
8 Tottenham Hotspur 38 14 9 15 45 45 0 51
9 West Ham United 38 14 9 15 42 45 −3 51
10 Manchester City 38 15 5 18 58 50 +8 50
11 Wigan Athletic 38 12 9 17 34 45 −11 45
12 Stoke City 38 12 9 17 38 55 −17 45
13 Bolton Wanderers 38 11 8 19 41 53 −12 41
14 Portsmouth 38 10 11 17 38 57 −19 41
15 Blackburn Rovers 38 10 11 17 40 60 −20 41
16 Sunderland 38 9 9 20 34 54 −20 36
17 Hull City 38 8 11 19 39 64 −25 35
18 Newcastle United (R) 38 7 13 18 40 59 −19 34 Relegation to the Football League Championship
19 Middlesbrough (R) 38 7 11 20 28 57 −29 32
20 West Bromwich Albion (R) 38 8 8 22 36 67 −31 32
Source: Premier League
Rules for classification: 1) points; 2) goal difference; 3) number of goals scored.
(C) Champion; (R) Relegated.
Notes:
  1. Since both finalists of the FA Cup (Chelsea and Everton) and the League Cup winners (Manchester United) qualified for the European competitions based on their league position, the sixth-placed team (Aston Villa) received a berth in the Europa League play-off round and the seventh-placed team (Fulham) received a berth in the Europa League third qualifying round.

Results
Home \ Away ARS AST BLB BOL CHE EVE FUL HUL LIV MCI MUN MID NEW POR STK SUN TOT WBA WHU WIG
Arsenal 0–2 4–0 1–0 1–4 3–1 0–0 1–2 1–1 2–0 2–1 2–0 3–0 1–0 4–1 0–0 4–4 1–0 0–0 1–0
Aston Villa 2–2 3–2 4–2 0–1 3–3 0–0 1–0 0–0 4–2 0–0 1–2 1–0 0–0 2–2 2–1 1–2 2–1 1–1 0–0
Blackburn Rovers 0–4 0–2 2–2 0–2 0–0 1–0 1–1 1–3 2–2 0–2 1–1 3–0 2–0 3–0 1–2 2–1 0–0 1–1 2–0
Bolton Wanderers 1–3 1–1 0–0 0–2 0–1 1–3 1–1 0–2 2–0 0–1 4–1 1–0 2–1 3–1 0–0 3–2 0–0 2–1 0–1
Chelsea 1–2 2–0 2–0 4–3 0–0 3–1 0–0 0–1 1–0 1–1 2–0 0–0 4–0 2–1 5–0 1–1 2–0 1–1 2–1
Everton 1–1 2–3 2–3 3–0 0–0 1–0 2–0 0–2 1–2 1–1 1–1 2–2 0–3 3–1 3–0 0–0 2–0 3–1 4–0
Fulham 1–0 3–1 1–2 2–1 2–2 0–2 0–1 0–1 1–1 2–0 3–0 2–1 3–1 1–0 0–0 2–1 2–0 1–2 2–0
Hull City 1–3 0–1 1–2 0–1 0–3 2–2 2–1 1–3 2–2 0–1 2–1 1–1 0–0 1–2 1–4 1–2 2–2 1–0 0–5
Liverpool 4–4 5–0 4–0 3–0 2–0 1–1 0–0 2–2 1–1 2–1 2–1 3–0 1–0 0–0 2–0 3–1 3–0 0–0 3–2
Manchester City 3–0 2–0 3–1 1–0 1–3 0–1 1–3 5–1 2–3 0–1 1–0 2–1 6–0 3–0 1–0 1–2 4–2 3–0 1–0
Manchester United 0–0 3–2 2–1 2–0 3–0 1–0 3–0 4–3 1–4 2–0 1–0 1–1 2–0 5–0 1–0 5–2 4–0 2–0 1–0
Middlesbrough 1–1 1–1 0–0 1–3 0–5 0–1 0–0 3–1 2–0 2–0 0–2 0–0 1–1 2–1 1–1 2–1 0–1 1–1 0–0
Newcastle United 1–3 2–0 1–2 1–0 0–2 0–0 0–1 1–2 1–5 2–2 1–2 3–1 0–0 2–2 1–1 2–1 2–1 2–2 2–2
Portsmouth 0–3 0–1 3–2 1–0 0–1 2–1 1–1 2–2 2–3 2–0 0–1 2–1 0–3 2–1 3–1 2–0 2–2 1–4 1–2
Stoke City 2–1 3–2 1–0 2–0 0–2 2–3 0–0 1–1 0–0 1–0 0–1 1–0 1–1 2–2 1–0 2–1 1–0 0–1 2–0
Sunderland 1–1 1–2 0–0 1–4 2–3 0–2 1–0 1–0 0–1 0–3 1–2 2–0 2–1 1–2 2–0 1–1 4–0 0–1 1–2
Tottenham Hotspur 0–0 1–2 1–0 2–0 1–0 0–1 0–0 0–1 2–1 2–1 0–0 4–0 1–0 1–1 3–1 1–2 1–0 1–0 0–0
West Bromwich Albion 1–3 1–2 2–2 1–1 0–3 1–2 1–0 0–3 0–2 2–1 0–5 3–0 2–3 1–1 0–2 3–0 2–0 3–2 3–1
West Ham United 0–2 0–1 4–1 1–3 0–1 1–3 3–1 2–0 0–3 1–0 0–1 2–1 3–1 0–0 2–1 2–0 0–2 0–0 2–1
Wigan Athletic 1–4 0–4 3–0 0–0 0–1 1–0 0–0 1–0 1–1 2–1 1–2 0–1 2–1 1–0 0–0 1–1 1–0 2–1 0–1
Source: Barclays Premier League
Legend: Blue = home team win; Yellow = draw; Red = away team win.

Season statistics

Scoring
  • First goal of the season: Samir Nasri for Arsenal against West Bromwich, 3 minutes and 40 seconds. (16 August 2008).[6]
  • Last goal of the season: Kenwyne Jones for Sunderland against Chelsea, 90 minutes. (24 May 2009)
  • Fastest goal in a match: 31 seconds – Steve Sidwell for Aston Villa against Everton (7 December 2008))[35]
  • Goal scored at the latest point in a match: 90+4 minutes and 56 seconds – Carlton Cole for West Ham United against Blackburn (30 August 2008)[36]
  • First own goal of the season: Robert Huth (Middlesbrough) for Tottenham Hotspur, 90+2 minutes and 28 seconds (16 August 2008)[37]
  • First hat-trick of the season and fastest hat-trick of the season: Gabriel Agbonlahor (Aston Villa) against Manchester City, 7 minutes and 3 seconds (17 August 2008)[7]
  • Most goals scored by one player in a match: 4 goals – Andrey Arshavin (Arsenal) against Liverpool, 36', 67', 70', 90' (21 April 2009)[38]
  • Widest winning margin: 6 goals – Manchester City 6–0 Portsmouth (21 September 2008)[39]
  • Most goals in a match: 8 goals
    • Arsenal 4–4 Tottenham Hotspur (29 October 2008)[40]
    • Liverpool 4–4 Arsenal (21 April 2009)[38]
  • Most goals in one half: 7 goals – Liverpool v Arsenal (21 April 2009) 0–1 at half time, 4–4 final[38]
  • Most goals in one half by a single team: 5 goals – Manchester United v Tottenham Hotspur (25 April 2009) 0–2 at half-time, 5–2 final[41]

Top scorers
Rank Player Club Goals[42]
1 Nicolas Anelka Chelsea 19
2 Cristiano Ronaldo Manchester United 18
3 Steven Gerrard Liverpool 16
4 Robinho Manchester City 14
Fernando Torres Liverpool 14
6 Gabriel Agbonlahor Aston Villa 12
Darren Bent Tottenham Hotspur 12
Kevin Davies Bolton Wanderers 12
Dirk Kuyt Liverpool 12
Frank Lampard Chelsea 12
Wayne Rooney Manchester United 12

Clean sheets
  • Most clean sheets – Manchester United (24)
  • Fewest clean sheets – Hull City (6)

Discipline

Overall
  • Most wins – Manchester United (28)
  • Fewest wins – Middlesbrough and Newcastle United (7)
  • Most losses – West Bromwich Albion (22)
  • Fewest losses – Liverpool (2)
  • Most goals scored – Liverpool (77)
  • Fewest goals scored – Middlesbrough (28)
  • Most goals conceded – West Bromwich Albion (67)
  • Fewest goals conceded – Chelsea and Manchester United (24)

Home
  • Most wins – Manchester United (16)
  • Fewest wins – Hull City (3)
  • Most losses – Hull City (11)
  • Fewest losses – Liverpool (0)
  • Most goals scored – Manchester United (43)
  • Fewest goals scored – Middlesbrough and Wigan Athletic (17)
  • Most goals conceded – Hull City (36)
  • Fewest goals conceded – Tottenham Hotspur (10)

Away
  • Most wins – Chelsea (14)
  • Fewest wins – West Bromwich Albion (1)
  • Most losses – Middlesbrough (15)
  • Fewest losses – Liverpool (2)
  • Most goals scored – Arsenal (37)
  • Fewest goals scored – West Bromwich Albion (10)
  • Most goals conceded – Stoke City (40)
  • Fewest goals conceded – Manchester United (11)

Miscellaneous
  • Longest injury time: 11 minutes, 2 seconds – Stoke City against Tottenham Hotspur (19 October 2008)[52]

Awards

Monthly awards
Month Manager of the Month Player of the Month
Manager Club Player Club
August[53] Gareth Southgate Middlesbrough Deco Chelsea
September[54][55] Phil Brown Hull City Ashley Young Aston Villa
October[56] Rafael Benítez Liverpool Frank Lampard Chelsea
November[57] Gary Megson Bolton Wanderers Nicolas Anelka Chelsea
December[58] Martin O'Neill Aston Villa Ashley Young Aston Villa
January[59] Sir Alex Ferguson Manchester United Nemanja Vidić Manchester United
February[60] David Moyes Everton Phil Jagielka Everton
March[61] Rafael Benítez Liverpool Steven Gerrard Liverpool
April[62] Sir Alex Ferguson Manchester United Andrey Arshavin Arsenal

Annual awards

Premier League Manager of the Season

Sir Alex Ferguson, 67, picked up the Premier League Manager of the Season for the ninth time. During his hugely successful spell with Manchester United, which began in 1986, he won eleven Premier League titles, five FA Cups, three League Cups, three European titles, one Intercontinental Cup and one Club World Cup.[63]

Premier League Player of the Season

Nemanja Vidić, 27, won the Premier League Player of the Season accolade for the first time.[64]

PFA Players' Player of the Year

The PFA Players' Player of the Year award for 2009 was won by Ryan Giggs of Manchester United.

The shortlist for the PFA Players' Player of the Year award was as follows:

PFA Team of the Year

Goalkeeper: Edwin van der Sar (Manchester United)
Defence: Glen Johnson (Portsmouth), Patrice Evra, Rio Ferdinand, Nemanja Vidić (all Manchester United)
Midfield: Steven Gerrard (Liverpool), Cristiano Ronaldo, Ryan Giggs (both Manchester United), Ashley Young (Aston Villa)
Attack: Nicolas Anelka (Chelsea), Fernando Torres (Liverpool)

PFA Young Player of the Year

The PFA Young Player of the Year award was won by Ashley Young of Aston Villa.

The shortlist for the award was as follows:

FWA Footballer of the Year

The FWA Footballer of the Year award for 2009 was won by Steven Gerrard for the first time. The Liverpool captain saw off the challenges of Manchester United winger Ryan Giggs and forward Wayne Rooney, who finished second and third respectively.

Premier League Golden Boot

Chelsea striker Nicolas Anelka won the Premier League Golden Boot award for the first time. He scored 19 goals in 35 appearances, which ensured he finished as the season's top scorer.

Premier League Golden Glove

Manchester United goalkeeper Edwin van der Sar collected the Premier League Golden Glove award for the first time. He kept a total of 21 clean sheets in 33 appearances, including a record run of 11 consecutive clean sheets (1,311 minutes) from Stoke City on 15 November 2008 to West Bromwich Albion on 27 January 2009.

Premier League Fair Play Award

The Premier League Fair Play Award is merit given to the team who has been the most sporting and best behaved team. Fulham won this, ahead of London neighbours Chelsea and Arsenal. Hull City were deemed the least sporting side, finished in last place in the rankings[65][66][67]

LMA Manager of the Year

The LMA Manager of the Year award was won by David Moyes after leading Everton to back-to-back fifth-place finishes and the FA Cup Final.[68]

PFA Fans' Player of the Year

Steven Gerrard was named the PFA Fans' Player of the Year.[69]

Premier League Merit Award
  • Aston Villa and former Blackburn Rovers goalkeeper Brad Friedel was honoured with the Premier League Merit Award after reaching 167 consecutive Premier League appearances on 5 December 2008.[70]
  • Manchester United goalkeeper Edwin van der Sar collected the Premier League Premier League Merit Award after breaking the Premier League record for minutes played without conceding a goal, spanning 11 consecutive clean sheets from Stoke City on 15 November 2008 to West Bromwich Albion on 27 January 2009.[71]
  • Portsmouth goalkeeper David James was honoured with the Premier League Premier League Merit Award after he broke the Premier League's appearance record with 536 appearances on 14 February 2009 in Portsmouth's 2–0 victory over Manchester City.[72]

Premier League Spirit Award

The Premier League Spirit Award is given to "the player or manager whose actions best encapsulate the spirit of the game". In recognition for leading his club to the top of the Fair Play league, the Premier League Spirit Award for 2008–09 was given to Fulham manager Roy Hodgson.[73]

Behaviour of the Public League

Given to the best-behaved fans. Fulham won this for the third consecutive year in a row, rounding off a hat-trick of sporting awards.[65] Stoke fans were the worst behaved in the 2008–09 season.[67]

gollark: Why randomly hide a somewhat useful thing?
gollark: *flexes in having a superior LCD display instead of foolish (AM)OLED*
gollark: *flexes in having a website with no theming capability whatsoever*
gollark: If I did care that much I can... well, cobble together some cascading™ style™ sheets™.
gollark: Not on pastebin, not that I care.

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