My Eyes Are Up Here

What eyes?

B'wana Beast: B'wana Beast. How you doin'?
Zatanna: (notices his stare) My legs are fine... as is the rest of me. (points to her face) Up here.
B'wana Beast: Whoa! She's got the fire of the cheetah in her! (snarls)

Zatanna: (to Batman, annoyed) Why are you doing this to me?

—Justice League Unlimited, "This Little Piggy"

An almost Always Female Stock Phrase, especially if the woman has Gag Boobs or her outfit may as well be Vapor Wear. Used to Lampshade the Male Gaze, though occasionally a well-endowed man will utter it as well for laughs. Contrast My Breasts Are Down Here.

One of the common joke variations is "Why the gorgons are even a threat to dudes?". Can also be a good Fun T-Shirt print.

Truth in Television. Compare Distracted by the Sexy. See also: Male Gaze, which often prompts this reaction.

Examples of My Eyes Are Up Here include:

Anime & Manga

• Misaki says this in Excel Saga to the camera in her introduction.
• Miharu from B Gata H Kei says this to her best friend Yamada, after the latter laments over her relative flat-chested-ness (Yamada's a B) and observing how very well-endowed (Miharu's an F) the former is.
• In Nightschool, Sarah uses this line on a coworker and old college friend who's flirting with her. Since he's a vampire, however, he's staring at her neck instead of the usual area.
• Gender Flipped in Seitokai Yakuindomo, where it's almost all of the female characters who are perverts. Their eyes often wander down to The One Guy's crotch, which leads to him telling them to look up.
• Hirasawa Ui from K-On! has something of an attitude like this towards Sawako-sensei because the latter's pointing out the former's greater endowment (when compared to her older sister) ruins her Twin Switches.

Ui: Good morning to my chest?!

• Hadzuki Nouge from Koe De Oshigoto is not aware that boys are looking at her breasts unless she is told so.

Comic Books

• In the Tom Strong story introducing Jonni Future, the niece with Gag Boobs related to Science Hero Johnny Future says this when she meets Johnny's male felinoid sidekick. To be fair, Johnny's own outfit was ridiculously beefcake and he didn't expect to be succeeded by a girl. He even had a Cleavage Window to show off his muscular, hairy chest!
• Sachs from the Sachs and Violens comic book has a T-shirt with that phrase printed on it.
• This might as well be Power Girl's Catch Phrase, as seen here. Of course, it might be a little hypocritical when you're wearing a Cleavage Window...
• The frequency of this trope in comics is addressed on this blog.
• One Justice League of America comic, featuring a meeting between Lex Luthor, The Joker, and Cheetah with this problem.

Cheetah: Quit staring! My eyes are up here!
The Joker: I know where your eyes are.

• Subverted and Lampshaded in Identity Crisis, which Green Arrow notes Slipknot's eyes aren't on Wonder Woman's rack, but on her hip—where her Magic Lasso is located.
• In the second issue of the 2011 reboot of Teen Titans, we get this exchange between Tim (Red Robin) Drake and Cassie (Wonder Girl) Sandsmark:

Cassie: Yo! Up here. (points at eyes) And before you ask -- Yes, they're real.
Tim: I wasn't looking at, um... them, Cassie. I was trying to figure out how those war bracelets you're wearing are invisible.

• Subverted with minor Gold Digger character Ayane, a mixed martial artist. She actually doesn't mind people looking at her chest. It keeps them from looking at the unfortunately permanent Death Glare she has.

Comedy

• Parodied by an Israeli stand-up comedian once.

"I don’t get women who say, 'My eyes are up here!' Cool, and your breasts are down here."

Comic Strips

• Played With in the Norwegian comic strip M: here and here. With a guy.
• This Doonesbury comic with "the angry chick".
• This Nemi strip has the girl experiment a bit on it.

Fan Works

• The aptly-titled, NSFW website Rule 34 (and with a name like that...) has a funny (and only mildly NSFW) featured image (image only ^{[dead link]} ) about a Gorgeous Gorgon that combines this trope with Shmuck Bait. In case you haven't already figured it out, click on a link and see what I mean.
  • Then you get Oglaf's equally NSFW version ...

Films -- Animation

• Played straight in Antz. When Weaver meets the lovely Azteca on his first day as a worker ant, he spends a bit too much time during their introduction staring at her legs.

Films -- Live-Action

• A gender-switched example occurred in New Moon. Whenever Bella talks to Jacob, her eyes are almost always on his almost-always bare chest.
• Bridget Jones had a coworker called Mr Fitzherbert that she had nicknamed "Tits Pervert" for this very reason.
• 1939 version of The Hunchback of Notre Dame has sexually frustrated villain Frollo staring at Esmeralda's breasts when they meet first time.
• In Nick and Norah's Infinite Playlist, Norah says this to Nick the first time he sees after his gay friends give her a more flattering bra to wear.
• The truck stop waitress in Tenacious D in The Pick of Destiny wears a shirt which reads "My Face Is Up Here".
• A Knight's Tale: When William is bludgeoning his way through a love letter to Jocelyn, Roland and Wat mention that he should mention that he "misses her breasts", after which Chaucer says, "I would tend to look above her breasts, William."

"I miss her neck?"

• Inverted in Where the Truth Lies, when Lanny tells a female audience member "I think you have the most beautiful eyes I have ever seen. Now you notice I say 'I think you've got the most beautiful eyes I've ever seen'; that's because I haven't actually seen them yet. I've been too busy staring at your cans."
• A variant from Faster, Pussycat! Kill! Kill!

Gas Station Attendant: Now that's what I believe in, seeing America first!
Varla: You won't find it down there, Columbus!

Live-Action TV

• An awkward moment in iCarly, which is a kids show:

Carly: I'm not a twig. I'm getting curvier everyday!
Freddie: (turns at Carly) I know.
Carly: (sternly) Eyes up, dude.

• There was a Saturday Night Live (guest host Kirstie Alley) where they had female aliens who had evolved their eyes in their breasts, because that's where all the men were looking.
• Done by Sally in an episode of 3rd Rock from the Sun. A professor at Dick's university is staring at her chest. She says, "I'm up here." He responds, "A lot of women like to think that."
• When Troy and Britta accidentally discover that the other is taking dance classes in Community, Britta can't help but have her eyes drawn downwards - twice - to a certain spot in Troy's tights.

"I know it's tempting to sneak a peek, but I'm gonna need for you to keep your eyes up here."

• How I Met Your Mother
  • Show up when Ted and Marshall were at a gay bar looking for Barney's gay brother; they were constantly getting hit on by guys.
  • Happens with Ted and Robin in Atlantic City—with Robin wearing a bikini T-shirt. "Are you staring at my shirt boobs?"
• Kate says this to Sawyer in the Lost episode "Catch-22" after he walks in on her dressing.
• Scrubs
  • In an episode, J.D.'s daydream involves Dr. Cox wetting himself out of nervousness. J.D. is staring at Cox's crotch for a good several seconds before Cox has to whistle and repeat the name of the trope several times to get J.D. back to reality.
  • Also inverted when J.D. and Elliot are in the locker room together. J.D. says they need to talk about the sexual tension, Elliot wheels around wearing only a bra and tells J.D. that there is no sexual tension. J.D. desperately tries to keep looking at her face until Elliot tells him to just look down before his neck snaps. Which he does. "Awesome".
  • And in another episode...

Molly: Hello there.
(all looks at her chest)
Molly: Yep, those are my boobs.
(all looks at her face)

• • As well in one of the Ben episodes, where Carla talks to J.D. alone about trusting his instincts - Carla teases him by asking him if he wants her body. J.D is flustered at first but gives in to the Male Gaze and Carla replies with a simple "Up here, Bambi".
• Kitty of Arrested Development says this to Michael repeatedly, regardless of whether he's actually looking at her breasts. And sometimes while flashing him.
• Discussed in House, season 4 episode 2. When the fake breast enhancement surgery they planned is threatened to be cancelled, the title character exclaims: "Would you condemn this woman to a life where people look at her face when they talk to her?"
• Alan ends up doing this in Two and A Half Men... and at a really bad time, as Jake had just got suspended from school after drawing an offensive picture of a big breasted girl (daughter of the woman he was staring at).
• A terrific subversion/lampshading happens in The X-Files episode "Humbug" in which Scully catches a sideshow freak staring at her chest through her unbuttoned shirt just as said freak notices Scully staring at his deformed conjoined twin through his opened robe. Both cover up immediately in embarrassment.
• In Doctor Who Rory is told off twice after staring a bit too long at a naked statue and then at older Amy.

The Doctor/Older Amy: Eyes front soldier.

• On The Drew Carey Show, Kate mentions trying to get a drunk Mr. Bell to stare at her face instead of her chest. They wound up compromising on the neck.
• Castle has a moment of this in a season 2 episode where the Body of the Week was reported while coroner Lainie was out clubbing. Turns out she's surprisingly buxom when not wearing scrubs.

Lainie: (to Beckett) Well, unlike you, I don't stand around all day waiting for a body to drop. Quit lookin' at the girls, Castle.

• • And she says it without missing a beat, making it all the funnier. Poor Castle has so much trouble not staring that he simply looks away.

Music

• Appears in the lyrics to "American Dreamgirl" by Joydrop:

Hey Mr. Music
My name's not honey
And don't call me dear
My eyes are up here

• On the Folsom Prison live album, Johnny Cash introduces June Carter to sing the duet "Jackson" with him, and they talk a bit, leading to this exchange:

Johnny Cash: Well, I like to watch you talk.
June Carter: I'm talking with my mouth. It's way up here.

Print Media

• Played straight and subverted by Toyfare magazine. Female toys will have word ballons saying this. Sometimes other toys you don't expect will have this as well. (Ex: the Bomarr Monk from Star Wars: Return of the Jedi.)

Tabletop Games

• The Hero Clix Power Girl figure (see "comic books" above) from the "Brave and the Bold" set has a special power called, "Eyes Up Here, Soldier". It causes opposing figures to drop their defenses. While it doesn't work on robots, it does work on other women.

Video Games

• Fallout 3. Sydney, a relic hunter, will say phrases like "Eyes up here, please," and "Less gawking, more walking," when you speak to her if you decide to team up with her to retrieve and split the loot you're both after.
• Fusionette from City of Heroes has been known to say this a time or two.
• Ruby from Gaia Online used to say this in her shop dialogue. Since the shops have been revamped, the line is now immortalized by the bonus pose of a collectible doll of her... blue eyes like hers.
• A PA in Star Ocean: The Last Hope has Edge walking in on Reimi in the shower while searching for Sarah's glasses. Reimi catches him while he's still partially stooped over, causing him to get eye level with her chest. He comments on her growth. She demands to know who he's talking to. Cue the Armor-Piercing Slap.
• This exact phrase is one of the dialogue option for the female protagonist (who starts the game only in her underwear) during the first dialogue with Atton Rand in Knights of the Old Republic II: The Sith Lords.
• An inversion occurs in the fan-made Neverwinter Nights 2 mod "Dark Waters". In the first chapter, in which you learn about the memories/personality quirks/etc. that were implanted into you and your party at the beginning, a female player has to remind Daniel that she has breasts when he starts treating her like the person whose memories she has.
• A very silly inversion occurs during one piece of random dialogue in Dragon Age II, where Varric reminds Isabela where his eyes are when she starts examining his chest hair.
• In Sonic the Hedgehog 2006 there were scenes where they tried and succeeded to get this past the radar. In said game, Shadow repeatedly glances at Rouge's breasts, although you only notice if you pay close attention to where he's looking. But in one scene, he trails off and just stares until she looks at him and he looks nervously to the side.
• Fear Effect: Retro Helix has Hana talking to this male Jerkass and she states the trope.
• In Leisure Suit Larry: Love for Sail! when talking to the nudist Drew Barringmore, she'll chide Larry as his gaze gradually drops. Unless you found the earplugs.

Web Comics

• Wulffmorgenthaler: Dick Bird proposes a practical way to avert this trope.
• Krakow
  • Inverted and Played for Laughs in this strip. Lucretia, a succubus, has three eyes. Being summoned by a guy who keeps staring at her Third Eye pisses her off.

Lucretia: Hey! My boobs are down here, buster!

• • Also played with in a later strip; apparently, demons consider a succubus' horns to be attractive, leading to a "I'm down here" remark.
• Jade of PvP has a City of Heroes character named The Titillator, with a Power Girl-esque costume and the battle cry "Eyes up here, buddy!"
• Dan and Mab's Furry Adventures
  • Notably averted in this strip, where Dan is clearly looking at his succubus grandmother in the eyes despite her being way taller than him.
  • Not to mention lampshaded beautifully in this earlier one about hypnosis.
  • Inverted in this strip where a shirtless guy doesn't like the attention.
• In Freefall Winston has a different reason for potentially saying that: squeaky shoe covers.
• Keychain of Creation has a hilarious inversion in one of the extra strips, with Marena trying to divert Misho to her other pair of eyes.
• In Apple Geeks, one of Alice's signature shirts is a black T-shirt with an arrow pointing up on her chest.
• A male example occurs in Penny and Aggie when Karen deliberately walks in, naked, on her boyfriend Marshall while he's showering in the gym.
• In one comic of Cheer, Kevin actually finds himself physically unable to pull his eyes from Karen's chest after she gets her new (and rather revealing) cheerleader uniform. A few comics later, he gets sunglasses, apparently with the sole intent of making Karen unable to tell where his eyes are pointed.
• This Concerned strip has Gordon Frohman eying Dr Mossman's chest.
• Sluggy Freelance
  • Torg gets it from Aylee after she shed her old form for a more female-looking one.
  • Torg and Riff get this response from another player in a MMORPG.
  • Torg also gets this reaction from Sasha. Who is wearing a shirt with a row of "i"s on it.
  • Inverted when Dr. Biyu keeps staring at Torg's melons.
• The proper response to this comment is demonstrated by Rayne in Least I Could Do.
• Implied in the introductory strip of DiDi in Ménage à 3.
• This Cyanide & Happiness strip.

"Yes, but your tits are down there."

• This strip of Loserz lampshades it.

Adam: Yeah. And so is your hair. What's your point?

• This is the well-endowed Lady Germany's Berserk Button in Scandinavia and The World.

Lady Germany: YOU WILL LOOK ME IN THE EYES OR DESPAIR!

• We don't know exactly what is done to this trope in this (probably NSFW) Ow, My Sanity chapter cover, but something is done to it.
• While it has yet to happen on-panel, Darby of Tru Life Adventures has implied she has to say this. A lot.
• This distraction saves an adventurer's life in Oglaf, as without it he would have gazed on a medusa's hideous face rather than its less-than-hideous body. (Though it turns out looking at either makes him rock-hard...)
• Exiern: "I know where your eyes are".
• Parodied in Hark a Vagrant with John Paul.
• In Nip and Tuck, Hortence wears a wig rather than falsies to establish that she's female because she is quite aware of this trope's existence and would rather have people looking at her face.
• Cordless: Venia gives Alfonso this remark, not for the first time it seems, but he immediately points out the hypocrisy of saying that while dressed in Stripperiffic garb.

Venia: And we've been over this. My face. Up here.
Alfonso: Soz. Even with your extremely modest duds Al somehow can't help himself, you know?
Venia: Point taken.

• In Our Little Adventure, Angelika exploits this to hide something under her shirt.
• In a Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal strip, a statitican's response is "I have no data to support that conclusion."
• Faye of Questionable Content wears a shirt with an upward arrow over her chest in at least one strip. Marten once mentioned that she "punches [him] if [his] eyes stray south of her jawline."
• Done (without achieving anything) by a boy in Dangerously Chloe here.
• Inverted in Nerf Now when dealing with Facehunter.

Web Original

• The Nostalgia Chick, as the Goblin King a.k.a. "Package!" says this in her review of Labyrinth.
• Said by Jesus' busty sister Tammi in this article by The Onion: "I saith unto thee: Look upon mine eyes, which dwell within mine head, and not upon mine bosom, wherein no wisdom dwells."
• In 80's Dan, ROB is staring at Dolly's chest, and she says this.
• In the first episode of Metamor City, "Welcome to the City", rookie cop Michael Perelli gets a particularly shocking version of this from Lieutenant Kate Kitaen; when he checks out her breasts, two huge eyes suddenly form on them to stare back at him. At the end of the episode he gets the explanation for how Kate managed this; she is an illusionist -- and a bit of a prankster.

Western Animation

• Played with in The Simpsons episode, "The Frying Game":

Carmen Electra: Homer, my face is up here.
Homer: (completely deadpan) I've made my choice.

• The exchange between B'wana Beast and Zatanna in Justice League Unlimited, quoted atop the page.
• On Family Guy, Lois has to occasionally grab Peter's face by the chin to redirect his gaze. Peter, being who he is, he just goes right back staring at Lois' chest.
• Inverted on South Park with Randy Marsh's testicles in "Medicinal Fried Chicken".
• Parodied on Home Movies, where Melissa tells Jason to stop looking at her fake boobs (a pair of balloons shoved into her top as part of her role in Brendan's latest movie). He insists that he can't.
• Inverted in Squidbillies where one of Early's hats has the phrase: "Tell your boobs to quit looking at my eyes" written on it.
• The Looney Tunes Show: In "The Shelf", Daffy (who doesn't wear clothes anyway) says this to Tina after he hands the towel he was wearing to Bugs. Later in the episode, Speedy says to Lola (holding his sombrero in front of himself) after Lola claims she has an x-ray eye.
• The Critic.

Jay: (openly staring at Valerie's breasts) Mm hmm, oh yeah, mm hmmm.
Valerie: (more amused than insulted) What are you doing?
Jay: (guilty) I was staring at your maguppies. They're my fumbling attempt at intimacy.