SpongeBob SquarePants/Quotes/Season 6
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The Splinter [6.1a]
Squidward: [same tone] The spatula...TIED TO YOUR NOSE!!
SpongeBob: Ohhh, this! [explains quickly]Well, you see, this got stuck up there so I stacked stuff and I climbed up to reach it. I reached it and grabbed it. I got it but then I fell and I screamed! I was sure I was dead but then I wasn't but then I tripped and I got this splinter and Squidward? Squidward, were you listening at all? I got this really bad splinter, you see? And I couldn't hold the spatula with my hand so I used my nose. Makes sense now, huh?
Squidward: [sarcastic] Oh, yeah, that makes perfect sense. You're a half-wit who injured himself at work being a nitwit.
SpongeBob: [laughs] Good one, Squiddy.
Squidward: [grumbles] Injury. Your brain is injured! [gets an idea] Wait a minute. Did you say that you got that splinter injury at work?
Sun Bleached [6.4a]
- Patrick: [sprays dirt with a water hose then dips SpongeBob who is sun bleached and horribly dry, into a puddle of mud, wipes the mud away from his eyes, puts two slabs of jerky for SpongeBob's buck teeth, then rips out his own armpit hair] AAHHHH!! AAH-AHH-AAAHH!! [instantly turns calm, then places the armpit hair onto SpongeBob's head, then gives SpongeBob a mirror] See?
- SpongeBob: [screams, horrified] I...look... [adoring voice] amaaaziiing.
Giant Squidward [6.7a]
- Patrick: [about Squidward's kelp flowers, with a soft tone] They're preeeeeeettyyy! [Squidward shrieks]
- Squidward: Patrick!
- SpongeBob: And SpongeBob!
- Squidward: What are you two doing here?
- SpongeBob: Patrick is helping me to do good deeds today, like trimming your kelp garden! [points to Patrick, who takes a large bite out of the kelp, then burps]
- Squidward: [Yells] STOP EATING MY KELP!!! [shoves Patrick and SpongeBob]
- Patrick: Okay, okay, geez! I try to help a fellow out. I'll just have to eat this ice cream cone instead!
- Squidward: Oh! Do you like to eat ice cream, Patrick?
- Patrick: Hmmmmmm...yeah.
- Squidward: Then have some more! [sprays the ice cream]
- Patrick: [falls over when the ice cream gets bigger] Whoa! Oof!
- Squidward: Ha, ha, ha! Still want that ice cream?
- Patrick: Boy I do! Thanks, Squidward! Want some, SpongeBob? Last one to the cone is a rotten clam!
- Squidward: [to SpongeBob and Patrick] HEY! Look at what you did to me! You better fix my nose, or you'll hear from my lawyer!
- SpongeBob: Are you sure?
- Patrick: Yeah! You'll be ugly again!
- SpongeBob: Good deed accomplished! I ask for no reward.
- Patrick: You're a saint, SpongeBob! A SAINT!
- SpongeBob: I know, and it is a burden I must carry.