Samowar in Atlantis/Characters

	This page needs some cleaning up to be presentable. Some or all of these characters need descriptions. A list of tropes is not a description.

Newly^[when?] introduced characters

Björn

• Author Avatar
• Character Development
• Chick Magnet: Deconstructed. May have contributed to his fling in Judea, but gets more of a point in Hamburg where it landed him the acquaintance of a crucial bunch of engineers and he lets you know that he grew sick and tired of this kind of attention once in a while. He also says that his early loss of innocence stems from the opportunity of external initiative and he doesn't mean Natascha.
• Deadpan Snarker
• Everyone Calls Him "Barkeep": At least his old friends from Wismar just call him "Samowar".
• Handsome Lech: He even admits that he at least used to be some kind of a dick. Like in Hamburg.
• Hormone-Addled Teenager
• The Ishmael
• Kissing Under the Influence: He has troubles remembering his first sexual intercourse and struggles to judge if it's been the "drunken number in the woods or the drunken number on the hey in the barn", only knowing that both occassion happened with the same girl whose name he forgot.
• Likes Older Women: Yes, he does. But on the other hand, he started an active sex life as a young teenager and age mates may hardly match his idea on "real women". And if an average of three years his senior really counts?
• Ordinary High School Student: Björn serves as a case study on how you get an ordinary everyman as close to the center of affairs as possible and remotely plausible.
• Sex as Rite-of-Passage: Averted big time.
• Troubling Unchildlike Behaviour: During a flashblack to four years before the Streich, you see a fatalist ten-year-old Björn in his classroom whose tutor is worried he might be prone to suicide. Oh, and he became to be a real toyboy soon after that.
• Wise Beyond His Years: Dude, did he ever have a childhood?
• Younger Than They Look: He used to look more like eighteen or twenty when he was fourteen, which makes a convenient excuse why a guy like him would get into the Peklo and why an older girl would hook up with him in the first place.

Saskia

• Author Avatar: Yes, there are two.
• Landlord
• Naughty by Night: She's seen to especially like to tease unfit tenant-candidates by first living out the woman in her with them before stating that exactly this sexual compatibility stands in the way to pursue a professional relationship like the envisioned tenancy.
• Otaku Surrogate: She reads one or another Brain Bleach every now and then.

Canon characters from the Chaos Timeline ^[1]

Schuhmann family

• Dysfunctional Family

Björn: "How pretty is the harmony, just as he boozed so did she!"

• Spell My Name with an "S": It's actually quite uncommon for the all-world name Schumann (lit. "shoe-man") to be written with the last letter H in the "Schuh", same goes for related names like Schumacher (lit. "shoe-maker").

Ignaz (canon)

• The Alcoholic
• Former Regime Personnel: He had quite a successful career at the technocracy's Secret Police, especially after about ten years of service in Europe payed off in form of a promotion to chief inspector in his Atlantean homeland. Things may have continued this way if not for the Velvet Revolution.
• Future Loser
• Iron Woobie: A really arme Sau by all accounts.
• I Was Beaten by a Girl: By his own daughter for the sake of self-defence.
• Jaded Washout
• Jerkass Woobie: There wasn't a place for people like him anymore after the Streich got his Secret Police disbanded. He first became a cab driver, then turned into a drunkard and essentially lost his licence and lived on the dole ever since. Essentially being a Jaded Washout, his daughter is actually running him and, to top it all, dates this Björn guy from the "old motherland" that left serious issues to him.
• Not Good with People: "Nazi" has never been a people's person, even per Word of God.
• Screw This, I'm Outta Here: After his mother dies, he moves from the Dakotas to her vacated home in Pennsylvania to save rent and tell the rest of the world to go screw itself.
• Why We're Bummed The Logos Striked: An ultimate poster child of this trope. The question what happened to this man was a major reason why the whole story has been written.

Rosemarie

• Shout-Out: Rosi is a shout-out to the song "Skandal im Sperrbezirk" by the Spider Murphy Gang. On a further note, Germans also think of another Rosemarie when they hear that name. But no, the fanfic's characther never sold her body or did anything especially naughty for that matter.
• Violently Protective Girlfriend: An absolute necessity considering who her father is.
• What the Hell Is That Accent?: She was born and raised in Southern European Germany, albeit at various places. Though she finally sounded "Hochdeutsch" enough, it seemed like a problem when the family came back to Atlantis.

Cats from Judea

• Jewish Complaining: And essentially all the other tropes associated with Jews and modern Israelis.
• Matzo Fever: Björn says that no catwalk were fit to hold a candle to an ordinary Judean street.

Tatjana (canon)

• Bare Your Midriff: This actually matches Word of God from the mothership, but here it gets conversed to show that all Judean women dress like 20-somethings.
• Cool Big Sis: Mind you that the "Kampfkatze" is actually Natascha's older cousin by a 20-year margin. But this trope is still valid from Björn's perspective.
• Goth: Unfortunately, when she had her Heroic BSOD regarding the 7/13 crisis, Natascha abused it as a Take That moment that even her hormone-ridden lay found anything but tactful.
• Lipstick Lesbian
• Statuesque Stunner

Natascha

• Bratty Teenage Sex Partner: Sorta in the eyes of Björn, at least in 1993. He shook his head about his 17-year-old lay and her disrespect for her adult cousin's professionality and her tendency to rather be "just a girl", mind you that he himself was only 14 years old. But she got better in the end.
• Character Development: But of course!
• Ethical Slut / Fille Fatale / Femme Fatale: You name it!
• Fiery Redhead: She's based on a heavy multiple Author Appeal and is a Judean, all the Mediterranean temperament included.
• Hormone-Addled Teenager
• Identical Stranger: The Irish-Catholic missionary Patricia Ó Domnhall.
• Overshadowed by Awesome: Yes, even for a fellow Hormone-Addled Teenager, the most thrilling Judean redhead sex pales in comparison to the completely different qualities of Tatjana.
• Shallow Love Interest: Subverted. Yes, Tascha has first and foremost been good for knocking boots, but Björn achieving One Degree of Separation with a whole crowd of Logos would have been unthinkable without her.
• Shout-Out: A multiple one, including
  • A character called Natascha in the German song Willenlos (lit. "without an own will") from Marius-Müller Westernhagen. ^[2]
  • The essential namesake of the characters is redhead singer Natasha Hamilton from Atomic Kitten. ^[3]
  • The other redhead is Lindsay Lohan whose sexual qualities have been similarly described in the yellow press as, ahem, ^[4]
• Valley Girl: Björn supposed Natascha to be a so-called Paradeiser girl. ^[5]

Finster family

• Red Oni, Blue Oni

Magnus aka "Fynstr"

• A Tragedy of Impulsiveness
• Meaningful Name: Lampshaded in "A Tale Of Two Brothers"
• Unwitting Instigator of Doom

Ruedi

• Empty Shell
• Tattooed Crook: No less than twelve bulbous spires on his back for every year in Argentinian jail.

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1. ↑ and their extended families that needn't be canon
2. ↑ The line roughly translates as "Her name was Natascha, she came from Novosibirsk, we drank vodka from bottles, she almost strangled me. She had pride, no question, I sent her orchids, man, I really wasn't capable to get out of her way, out of her way."
3. ↑ That's why Björn often contracted his fling to "Tascha" in a way similar to "Tash" at said Hamilton lady
4. ↑ may we advice you to the Expy entry at the main page ?
5. ↑ Austrian short form of "paradise apple" or "tomato", implying overtanned skin, a bit like in Australian "Pom" for British. Remember that this timeline's Hollywood is actually called Paradies, make of that what you will.