Suicide Is Painless

"Suicide Is Painless" is a song written by Johnny Mandel (music) and Michael Altman (lyrics). It was the theme song for both the movie and TV series M*A*S*H.[1]

This article is about the song. For the Grey's Anatomy episode, see Suicide Is Painless (Grey's Anatomy). For the cause of death, see Suicide. For other uses, see Suicide (disambiguation).

"Suicide Is Painless"
Single by The Mash
from the album M*A*S*H (Original Soundtrack Recording)
B-side	"The M*A*S*H March"
Released	1970
Recorded	1969
Length	2:53
Label	Columbia/CBS
Composer(s)	Johnny Mandel
Lyricist(s)	Mike Altman
Producer(s)	Thomas Z. Shepard
Music video
"Suicide Is Painless" (audio) on YouTube

The song was written specifically for Ken Prymus, the actor playing Private Seidman, who sang it during the faux-suicide of Walter "Painless Pole" Waldowski (John Schuck) in the film's "Last Supper" scene.[2][3] Director Robert Altman had two stipulations about the song for Mandel: it had to be called "Suicide Is Painless" and it had to be the "stupidest song ever written".[4] Altman attempted to write the lyrics himself, but upon finding it too difficult for his 45-year-old brain to write "stupid enough,"[5] he gave the task to his 14-year-old-son Michael, who wrote the lyrics in five minutes.[6][7][8]

Altman later decided that the song worked so well, he would use it as the film's main theme, despite Mandel's initial objections.[9] This version was sung by uncredited session singers John Bahler, Tom Bahler, Ron Hicklin, and Ian Freebairn-Smith and the single was attributed to "The Mash". During an appearance on The Tonight Show Starring Johnny Carson in the 1980s, Robert Altman said that while he only made $70,000 for having directed the movie, his son had earned more than $1 million for having co-written the song.

Several instrumental versions of the song were used as the theme for the TV series. It became a number one hit in the UK Singles Chart in May 1980.[10] The song was ranked #66 on AFI's 100 Years...100 Songs.

Track listing

7" vinyl

• West Germany: CBS / 5009
• UK: CBS / S CBS 8536
• US: Columbia / JZSS 153321 [Promo only]
• US: Columbia / ZSS 153321 [original release]

A-side

No.	Title	Writer(s)	Artist	Length
1.	"Theme from M*A*S*H (Suicide Is Painless)"	Johnny Mandel, Mike Altman	The Mash	2:53

B-side

No.	Title	Writer(s)	Artist	Length
1.	"The M*A*S*H March"	Mandel	Johnny Mandel	1:19

Chart performance

Chart (1970)	Peak position
Dutch GfK chart[11]	3
Dutch Top 40[12]	4
Chart (1980)	Peak position
UK Singles Chart[13]	1
Irish Singles Chart	1

Manic Street Preachers version

"Theme from M.A.S.H. (Suicide Is Painless)"
Single by Manic Street Preachers
from the album Ruby Trax
B-side	"(Everything I Do) I Do It for You" (by The Fatima Mansions) "Sleeping with the NME" "Spectators of Suicide" "Star Lover" "Never Want Again" "Dead Yankee Drawl" "Ain't Goin' Down"
Released	September 7, 1992 (1992-09-07)
Genre	Alternative rock, soft rock[14]
Length	3:43
Label	Columbia
Songwriter(s)	Johnny Mandel (music) Mike Altman (lyrics)
Producer(s)	Manic Street Preachers
Manic Street Preachers singles chronology
"Motorcycle Emptiness" (1992) "Theme from M.A.S.H. (Suicide Is Painless)" (1992) "Little Baby Nothing" (1992)

Welsh alternative rock band Manic Street Preachers released a cover version of "Suicide Is Painless" on September 7, 1992, as "Theme from M.A.S.H. (Suicide Is Painless)". In the UK it was a double A-side charity single to help The Spastics Society, with The Fatima Mansions' take on Bryan Adams' "(Everything I Do) I Do It for You" as the other A-side. The 12" and CD versions of the UK single included "Sleeping with the NME" – an excerpt from a radio documentary recorded in the offices of the NME capturing staff's reaction to photographs of guitarist Richey Edwards' infamous self-mutilation. The single peaked at number 7 in the UK Singles Chart[15] spending three weeks in the Top Ten.

Track listings

7" vinyl

• UK: Columbia / 658382 7

Side A

No.	Title	Writer(s)	Artist	Length
1.	"Theme from M.A.S.H. (Suicide Is Painless)"	Johnny Mandel, Mike Altman	Manic Street Preachers	3:40

Side B

No.	Title	Writer(s)	Artist	Length
1.	"(Everything I Do) I Do It for You"	Bryan Adams, Michael Kamen, Robert John "Mutt" Lange	The Fatima Mansions	6:26

• Netherlands: Columbia / COL 658385 7

Side A

No.	Title	Writer(s)	Length
1.	"Theme from M.A.S.H. (Suicide Is Painless)"	Mandel, Altman

Side B

No.	Title	Writer(s)	Length
1.	"Spectators of Suicide"	James Dean Bradfield, Nicky Wire, Sean Moore, Richey James Edwards

12" vinyl

• UK: Columbia / 658382 6

Side A

No.	Title	Writer(s)	Artist	Length
1.	"Theme from M.A.S.H. (Suicide Is Painless)"	Mandel, Altman	Manic Street Preachers

Side B

No.	Title	Writer(s)	Artist	Length
1.	"(Everything I Do) I Do It for You"	Adams, Kamen, Lange	The Fatima Mansions
2.	"Sleeping with the N.M.E."		Manic Street Preachers

CD

• UK: Columbia / 658382 2

No.	Title	Writer(s)	Artist	Length
1.	"Theme from M.A.S.H. (Suicide Is Painless)"	Mandel, Altman	Manic Street Preachers
2.	"(Everything I Do) I Do It for You"	Adams, Kamen, Lange	The Fatima Mansions
3.	"Sleeping with the N.M.E."		Manic Street Preachers

• Europe: Columbia / 658385 2

No.	Title	Writer(s)	Length
1.	"Theme from M.A.S.H. (Suicide Is Painless)"	Mandel, Altman
2.	"Spectators of Suicide"	Bradfield, Wire, Moore, Edwards
3.	"Star Lover"	Bradfield, Wire, Moore, Edwards

• Japan: Epic/Sony / ESCA 5668

No.	Title	Writer(s)	Length
1.	"Theme from M.A.S.H. (Suicide Is Painless)"	Mandel, Altman	3:43
2.	"Never Want Again"		3:39
3.	"Dead Yankee Drawl"		3:46
4.	"Ain't Goin' Down"		3:08

Chart performance

Chart (1992)	Peak position
UK Singles Chart	7[15]
Irish Singles Chart [16]	12
Swedish Singles Chart [17]	21

Cover recorded versions

• Grady Tate recorded a soul-jazz version of the song for his 1970 album After the Long Drive Home.
• Al De Lory recorded a jazz piano version for his 1970 album Al De Lory Plays Song from M*A*S*H. This version peaked at #7 on the adult contemporary chart during the summer of 1970.[18]
• Henry Mancini recorded an easy listening version for his 1970 album Mancini Plays the Theme from Love Story.
• Andre Kostelanetz recorded an easy listening version for his 1970 album Everything Is Beautiful.
• Fung Bo Bo recorded a female-vocal version (in English) on a Malaysian EP (MMI Top 21006) in 1970.
• Ahmad Jamal recorded an instrumental jazz-funk version for his 1974 album Jamalca. This version was included on some re-releases of the soundtrack album. Jamal recorded another version of the tune for his 1985 album Digital Works.
• Roy Ayers recorded an instrumental version for his 1974 album Change Up the Groove.
• Paul Desmond recorded an instrumental version for his 1974 album Pure Desmond.
• 101 Strings recorded an easy listening version for their 1975 album T.V. Themes.
• Kerstin Forslund and the Small Town Singers released a version in 1975.[19] The single peaked at 17th position in Sweden,[20] Top 100 chart in Australia.
• Bobby Hutcherson recorded a jazz vibraphone instrumental version for his 1975 album Linger Lane titled "Theme from M*A*S*H".
• Norrie Paramor recorded an instrumental version for his 1975 album Radio 2 Top Tunes Vol. 3.
• Ray Conniff recorded an easy listening version for his 1976 album Theme from S.W.A.T. and Other TV Themes.
• Bill Evans recorded a jazz piano trio version for You Must Believe in Spring, an album posthumously released in 1980, having made it a staple of his live sets for some years. Evans' version modulates through 4 keys. The song is also recorded in a jazz piano trio version on the CD Bill Evans Trio, recorded live in Buenos Aires in 1979.
• Cal Tjader recorded a version for his 1981 album The Shining Sea.
• Franck Pourcel recorded a version for his 1982 album Palmes D'or.
• Jimmy Smith recorded a version for his 1982 album Off the Top.
• Art Of Noise performed a short instrumental interpolation on their 1984 track "A Time for Fear (Who's Afraid)", featured on both Who's Afraid of the Art of Noise? and Daft.
• Eastern Images recorded a version in 1985.
• Sue Raney recorded a vocal version for her 1988 album Quietly There.
• Royal Trux recorded a version for the BBC John Peel radio show in 1993. It was released in 1997 on a Royal Trux compilation called Singles, Live, Unreleased. On the compilation the song is titled "Theme from M.A.S.H."
• Killarmy sampled the music for their 1997 track "5 Stars" from the Silent Weapons for Quiet Wars album.
• Edgar Cruz recorded an instrumental cover of the song for his 1997 album Reminiscence titled "M*A*S*H Theme".
• In 1997, Three 6 Mafia sampled it on their song "Will Blast", from their album Chapter 2: World Domination.
• Jay-Jay Johanson performed a version of this song on France Inter in 1997, later released on a promotional CD. In 2011 it appeared on his album Spellbound.
• Marilyn Manson did a version for the soundtrack of Book of Shadows: Blair Witch 2 in 2000.
• Richard Schiff sang a portion of the song as a drunken Toby Ziegler in a Season 5 episode of The West Wing titled "The Stormy Present".
• Barði Jóhannsson and Keren Ann recorded a version for their 2003 album Lady and Bird.
• Stewie Griffin (voiced by Seth MacFarlane) sang a part of it in Stewie Griffin: The Untold Story in 2005.
• Matt Costa, singer-songwriter from Huntington Beach, California, USA covered the song on his six-track The Elasmosaurus EP in 2005.
• Kelis does her own interpretation of the song in her single "Lil Star" (with Cee-Lo), released in 2007.
• The Drones performed an acoustic version in 2008 on Triple J in Australia.
• Yuji Ohno recorded an instrumental version for his 2009 album Y. O. Connection.
• Amanda Lear recorded an acoustic and a dance version of this song for her 2009 album Brief Encounters.
• Ania Dąbrowska recorded a version of this song for her 2010 album Ania Movie.
• Tripod did a short acoustic rendition of the theme in the song "Lingering Dad". Additionally, portions of the theme were later used in the song "Theme from Mash Guy" – a comedic song about a fictionalised writer of the song in an existentialist crisis over being known only as "the theme from M*A*S*H guy".
• Harry Allen/Jan Lundgren Quartet performs an instrumental version in the 2015 Stunt album Quietly There.
• Michael Kollwitz released an arrangement for the Chapman Stick[21] in 2012.
• The TV Theme Players recorded their version for the 2014 album The TV Theme Collection.
• Fairmont released their version of this song in 2018 on Mint 400 Records Presents: At The Movies.

References

1. MASH series, every intro!, retrieved March 26, 2020
2. "Interview with Johnny Mandel". JazzWax.com. October 24, 2008. Bob said to me, 'You know, I need a song for the film. It’s that Last Supper scene, after the guy says he’d going to do himself with a pill because his life is over, because couldn’t get it up with the WAC the night before.'
3. Michael L. LaBlanc. "Gale Musician Profiles: Johnny Mandel". The Gale Group. The Theme for M*A*S*H (Suicide Is Painless) wasn’t intended to be the theme of the motion picture. It was written in 1970 for the "Last Supper" scene and was actually intended to be played by one of the actors. It had to be written before the movie was actually shot.
4. "Interview with Johnny Mandel". JazzWax.com. October 24, 2008. Bob also said the song had to be called 'Suicide Is Painless'. 'Since [Capt.] Painless commits suicide with a pill, that would be a good title,' he said. Then he said, 'It’s got to be the stupidest song ever written.'
5. "Interview with Johnny Mandel". JazzWax.com. October 24, 2008. Bob was going to take a shot at the lyrics. But he came back two days later and said, 'I’m sorry but there’s just too much stuff in this 45-year-old brain. I can’t write anything nearly as stupid as what we need.'
6. "Interview with Johnny Mandel". JazzWax.com. October 24, 2008. Bob said, "All is not lost. I’ve got a 15-year-old kid who’s a total idiot." So Michael Altman, at age 15, wrote the lyrics, and then I wrote the music to them.
7. Michael L. LaBlanc. "Gale Musician Profiles: Johnny Mandel". The Gale Group. His 14-year-old son, Mike Altman, was enlisted and wrote the lyrics in five minutes to which Mandel later added the melody.
8. Francis D. McKinley. "MASH Notes: The Story Behind "Suicide is Painless". Neatorama.
9. Michael L. LaBlanc. "Gale Musician Profiles: Johnny Mandel". The Gale Group. Later when the movie was being edited, Mandel heard the song being played over the film’s title in the helicopter scene and protested, saying, "It was the stupidest thing I have ever seen," and angrily walked out insisting it didn’t fit. The studio ignored his protest.
10. Roberts, David (2006). British Hit Singles & Albums (19th ed.). London: Guinness World Records Limited. p. 381. ISBN 1-904994-10-5.
11. "dutchcharts.nl – M*A*S*H – Suicide Is Painless (Theme from M*A*S*H)" (in Dutch). Retrieved July 27, 2009.
12. "De Nederlandse Top 40: week 39, 1970" (in Dutch). Retrieved July 27, 2009.
13. "The Official Charts Company – MASH – Theme from 'M*A*S*H' (Suicide Is Painless)". Retrieved July 27, 2009.
14. Burrows, Marc (October 25, 2012). "Old music: Manic Street Preachers – Theme from M*A*S*H (Suicide Is Painless)". The Guardian. Retrieved December 29, 2015.
15. "Official Charts Company". Official Charts. Retrieved February 26, 2015.
16. "irishcharts.ie search results". Retrieved July 27, 2009.
17. "swedishcharts.com – Manic Street Preachers – Suicide Is Painless (Theme from M.A.S.H)". Retrieved July 27, 2009.
18. Adult Contemporary : July 04, 1970 | Billboard Chart Archive. Billboard.com (1970-07-04). Retrieved on 2014-03-29.
19. "Suicide Is Painless" (in Swedish). Svensk mediedatabas. 1975. Retrieved November 25, 2013.
20. "Suicide Is Painless" (in Swedish). Hitparad. 1975. Retrieved November 25, 2013.
21. "Rainbows: Solo Chapman Stick SG-12: Michael Kollwitz: MP3 Downloads". Amazon.com. Retrieved October 3, 2016.

External links

• Lyrics of this song at MetroLyrics