Wicked Cultured/Quotes

"You're a cook. I don't kill cooks. Although...there was that one time in Boston. But all I'd have to do is get the jury to taste his salmon mousse, and there isn't a court in the land that would convict me."

—The Shade, "Incident In An Old Haunt"

For a complete, reprehensible monster, Iruel has a wonderful singing voice.

—Nobody Dies, on the Eleventh Angel Iruel

Evil Genius: Forgive the blindfold, Mr. Cooch. An unfortunate necessity, I'm afraid. I bid you welcome to the new headquarters of my organization.
Mr. Cooch: Yeah, very nice, call me Ryan.

Evil Genius: Alas, I abhor informality.

—That Mitchell and Webb Look

"Hitler loved good music and many top Nazis were cultured and sophisticated men, but it didn't do them, or anyone else, much good."

—Stanley Kubrick

Scorpius: Revenge is a dish that is best served cold. And you like revenge, don't you, John?

Crichton: Shut up! I hate it when villains quote Shakespeare!

—Farscape, "Crackers Don't Matter"

"He's a savage beast, but he listens to Beethoven. He feeds on the innocent, but is still intelligent and well-spoken."

—The Nostalgia Critic, on Alex from A Clockwork Orange

Phantom Limb: Rembrandt van Rijn — a hundred fifty years ago, Delacroix said of Rembrandt that his works would be held higher than those of Raphael. His blasphemous prophecy came true within fifty years, and this one could be yours for the pittance of 10 million, American.
Mafioso: No, I want the Mona Lisa.

Phantom Limb: Look, the Mona Lisa’s not a better painting, it’s merely a more famous one, and it was made more famous because it was stolen. And this was stolen, so…

—The Venture Brothers

You know what the most dangerous thing in America is, right? Nigger with a library card.

—Brother Mouzone, The Wire

Flash: (in an art museum) Wow. Someone sure did a number on this place.
Ultra-Humanite: Actually, I hadn't even started. Do you believe the horrendous amount of public funding spent on this so-called "art"? (starts shooting) It's garbage! An affront to any decent human aesthetic!

Flash: O-kaaay. I'll just take you back to prison where you won't have to look at the ugly old sculptures anymore.

—Justice League, "Comfort and Joy"

"This particular time and place, and for my work, they are necessary evils. Not my friends. However, with the right connections, even in this part of the world, we are not entirely uncivilized."

—Rene Belloq, Raiders of the Lost Ark