Deadpan Snarker/Web Comics

The one on the right.

• Aeris, the pink female cat from VG Cats, provides the page pic. Pantsman is snarky as well, but to a lesser extent.
• Richard from Looking for Group.
  • "I'm no physician, but there appears to be a dagger in my chest."
• Labor Day in Holiday Wars often delivers these types of lines. The first time he did so happened in this strip
• Antimony and Reynardine from Gunnerkrigg Court.

Reynardine: Haha! Tired already, child?
Antimony: Don't be so cocky. You don't have any lungs.

• Jason Grey in The Wotch (and Sonja as well).
• Stickman from Stickman and Cube.
• Zodon from the web- and print-comic PS238.
• Tycho in Penny Arcade.
• Order of the Stick is a World of Snark, so it may takes some times...
  • Roy Greenhilt has his snarkiness being his primary character flaw -- according to the beings of pure law and good that judge him in the afterlife, anyway. Since he is Lawful Good, that's a flaw.
  • Among the supporting roles, Vaarsuvius plays this role often.
  • As does Belkar, post-fake Character Development.

Crystal: Arrgh! You little twit, I'm gonna kill you!
Belkar: Yeah, and I'm going to drop a house on you and sing about how I represent the Lollipop Guild. C'mon, let's keep our threats realistic, shall we?

• • On the evil side, this role is usually taken by Redcloak, who is often paired up with over-the-top cliched bad guy Xykon or the adorably naive Monster in the Darkness.

Redcloak: I'm on my way to finish zombifying the monsters we killed up in the tower.
MitD: Yeah, I can help with that.
Redcloak: Really? So, I guess those three boxes of mallomars you finished off somehow earned you enough XP to gain 5 levels in cleric overnight.
MitD: Well, they were especially chewy....
Redcloak: Then unless you are volunteering your services as raw materials, I don't think you are going to be much help.

• • Half of the named characters get a crowning moment of snark or two, and some unnamed. Bonus points to Spoony Bard Elan, who's not particularly bright most of the time, doubles as his Crowning Moment of Awesome when he pulls a What the Hell, Hero? moment on Varsuvius when he/she killed a minor villain purely because he/she was impatient that the plot wasn't moving fast enough for his/her taste.
  • The Demon-Roaches are also full Snarky Non Human Sidekicks.
• Kris from Bardsworth.
• Faye (and others) in Questionable Content.
  • Early in the comic's run, Faye and Martin got their new apartment because the landlady liked their snarkiness.
• Kadeen of Knights Errant gets an honorable mention for snarking while suffering from a massive chest wound.
• Nearly all the cast of Something*Positive, but Davan is King Snark. Also many people in another of the author's comics, Super Stupor. Come to think of it, perhaps every character R. K. Milholland creates.
  • And thus, probably Milholland himself, as well.
• Adventurers!! has one in each camp: Ardam for the heroes and Argent for the villains. Though Ardam is usually more "exasperated" than "deadpan".
• Jason in Multiplex. Funnily enough, he is often confused for an Author Avatar, which the author denies... to some extent.
• Most of the cast of Lackadaisy Cats indulges in some snark, but Zib almost exists to offer his sarcastic take on matters.
• Rayne of Least I Could Do goes so far over the top with the Idiot Hero and Handsome Lech routines that most of the rest of the cast are divided into those who can use deadpan snarking to survive his bombastic ways (Issa and Noel), and those who turn into his punching bags (Jon and Mick). Noel is probably the best example.
• Any character in Antihero for Hire who isn't a) Doctor Nefarious b) ice-powered guy still looking for a name c) Baron Diamond. And they have their moments.
• Half the regular [non-superhero] cast in Head Trip, Lilian especially, plus Chemokid.
• A vast majority of the cast of Eight Bit Theater. Most notable are Sarda, Black Mage, Thief, and White Mage.
• Kei in Circumstances of the Revenant Braves.
• Emperor Krosp in Girl Genius. Then again, he is a cat. It comes with the territory.
  • Wooster gets in his digs, too. (Though as he's British that also comes with the territory.)
  • Lately, Moloch von Zinzer has been getting in some good lines.
  • And airman 3rd class Axel Higgs.
  • What about our heroine Agatha?

Agatha:(as she and Gil are plummeting) Oh, it's a falling machine. I'm so impressed.

• • Carson von Mekkhan seems to have this as his default setting.
  • Dr. Sun is infamous for his "sun-ny bedside manner."
  • In fact it's fair to say Girl Genius is a World of Snark.
• Dewey from Unshelved.

Mell: People don't like it when you're right all the time.
Dewey: If being right is wrong, I don't want to be right. Nah, I still want to be right.

• Nancy in Rhapsodies.
• Every main and supporting character in both Michael Poe's Errant Story have their moments of this, but the males seem especially prone to it. Jon and Ellis probably have a Snark/Strip ratio of 2:1.
• Green in The Law of Purple occasionally pulls a Deadpan Snarker moment, as does his brother Blue.
• Marius from My Life in Blue.
• While Artax tries it occasionally...

Yeager: Contrary to... most of my dating history, not every woman who's interested in me is a flesh-craving abomination.
Artax: Really? Have you been seeing someone we don't know about?

... Nodwick does it more or less nonstop.

Artax: She Who Must Not Be Named has taken That Which Man Was Not Meant To Know!
Nodwick: Did she say where She Who went?
Artax: To The Lands Which Know No Name!
Nodwick: Uh-huh... let me know if we find any proper nouns in all this mess.

• In RPG World, every member of the main cast gets a turn at deadpan snarking, even the dim-witted Hero. Cherry, Eikre, and Reka are the most frequent offenders.
• Most of the cast of Fletcher Apts except for Kia and Mr.Fletcher.
• Mr. Snippy in Romantically Apocalyptic.

Captain: [in front of a computer with a destroyed monitor] Hello computer... I'd like one free internet please. Maybe if I twiddle these wires...
Mr. Snippy: You are an idiot.
Captain: What? No... Why?
Mr. Snippy: [holding up a cell phone with a destroyed screen] To illustrate, I shall take a photo of your epic failure with my phone.

• Susan in El Goonish Shive, natch.
• K, Liz, Mary, and Lucifer from Blip.
• Bunker from Sandusky.
• Brent Sienna from PvP.
  • Disputed in Family Matters by Francis, who thinks Brent has become more of a Jerk with a Heart of Gold. Francis also suggests that the new deadpan snarker be Max Powers.
• Reuben from Woods for The Trees.
• Daniel from Footloose, which can result in his receiving a smack (or boot) upside the head from his twin sister Jin.
• Zombie of Hanna Is Not a Boy's Name is so deadpan that it can be hard to tell whether he's serious or not.
• Flint from A Loonatic's Tale is very much this.
• McCain from Bittersweet Candy Bowl has this down to an art. Lucy can be pretty good at this too.
• Bert and Darby from TRU-Life Adventures are the most consistently snarky among the toy store staff, but almost everyone working there gets a moment. It must be a survival technique for dealing with the customers.
• So, so, so many examples from Homestuck. Just within the main characters, Dave, Rose, and occasionally John all qualify, and beyond that, practically half the cast qualifies.
• All of the characters in Out There, but mostly Sherry, Clayton, and James.
• Erfworld gives us Prince Tramennis and, to a lesser extent, Foolamancer Jack Snipe.
• Zinger Sharpley from Everyday Heroes.
• Hugo the rat from Captn Crazy.
• Max's reaction to having his leg blown off by a suit case bomb? Snark..
• Plenty of snark in Exterminatus Now. Earliest example:

Harold Eastwood (On Virus smoking in his intro page): You mean it was a lame attempt to look badass.
Syrus "The Virus" Zuviel: Did it work?
Eastwood: No, you just looked like a regular ass.
Virus: Ha. And indeed, ha. Don't quit your day job Harry.

• Most of the main cast of Rumors of War, and a good chunk of the periphery characters are snarky -- possibly to the point of creating a veritable World of Snark.
• Jean in The Inexplicable Adventures of Bob, reflecting the fact that she is the Only Sane One in the cast.
• Shelly's conscience from Wapsi Square is just as sarcastic as it is creepy.
• Rhea from Slightly Damned is snark with a tail.
• The Word Weary features a character named Yorick who has yet to have a line that ISN'T dead snarky.
• Charlie from Khaos Komix has shades of this.
• Ozy of Ozy and Millie is a fairly straight example. One prominent case of his wit acting up came when Avery declared himself to be a "bad boy".
• Yuudai from Sakana is this occasionally, which fits well with his general Jerkass personality.
• Howard from Zodiac Blues, even when he's facing his worst fears.
• Art from Sequential Art is like this whenever he isn't busy being an Adult Child.

Art: If I come back to find you minus a head, I'm not going to cry.

• Sheila in At Arms Length within her group of friends. Also Kaige at times.
• Alex Williams of Captain SNES can be extremely sarcastic.
• Imm from this strip appears to be headed this way.
• Gigi is this constantly in her author notes for Cucumber Quest.
  • Also Peridot, Almond, what little we've seen of Saturday, the two cake ladies, Saturday's butler...
  • ...The Nightmare Knight...

NK: This is the queen.
Splashmaster: So?
NK: So, this isn't the princess. They're two different people. Surely even you can grasp this concept.
Splashmaster: But queen just older fatter princess!

• A few characters in Sinfest, including Slick and Nique, but especially The Dragon, personification of Eastern religion. Especially on the subject of [this https://web.archive.org/web/20140209171357/http://sinfest.net/archive_page.php?comicID=1401 whole] "God vs. Devil" tug-of-war. Poking fun at both of these apparently amuses him endlessly. Though mortals are also mocked if they are clowns enough.