True Capitalist/Quotes

"I always walk around out here in Texas with my strap-on, uh..."

—Ghost

Caller: Harmony I love you! Silverpony, you my girl! Derpykins, you my nigga! You my nigga-

Ghost: Stupid fruitbowl, GEDDIMOFF!

—True Capitalist Radio, 8/02/11

"SCHLIEBEN, SCHLIEBEN, SCHLOGGIN, VOLKSWAGON!"

—Ghost, speaking German

"And all you assholes who say I'm racist- hey! It's the truth!"

—Ghost

"If the world is dark and your friends seem fickle, just grab some poop and give it a tickle!"

—wise words from Senator Pooptickler

"Congratulations Ghost, you're the new Rainbow Dash! AW YEAH BEST DAY EVER"

—Tango Whiskey

Tub Guy "Ghost lets have a three way with Rick Perry. Oh my!"
Ghost: "Are you in the tub?!"
Tub Guy: "There's a distinct possibility, my good sir!"

Ghost: "Ah Jesus Christ, geddemoff- I mean, HE'S CALLING ME FROM THE TUB, GOOD GOD!"

—True Capitalist Radio

Ghost: "Is this you calling me from the tub again?!"

Tub Guy: "When the hell do I not call you from the tub, good sir?"

—True Capitalist Radio

"Let's see, we got, uh... 'ImDeflectingPearlsHere'- OH SCREW YOU!"

—True Capitalist Radio, twitter shoutouts

"POOPTICKLER?! WHAT KIND OF A NAME IS POOP TICKLER?!"

—Ghost's reaction to the Pooptickler family

Caller: Ghost, I came here cuz of the trolls, you're actually pretty funny.^[?]

Ghost: Well, of course, cuz I bring da lulz better than anybody THROUGHOUT THE WORLD!!

—Radio Graffiti, July 13th, 2011

"Wake up in the morning next to Alex Jonesey

Ghost waddles down the stairs and watches My Little Pony."

—Opening lines of the Tik Tok parody played on December 16th, 2011

Caller (in nerdy voice): "Um, hi, so, which candidate should I vote for if i want to maximize my chances of being able to legally download hardcore tentacle hentai?"

Ghost: How about you kill yourself?

—Radio Graffiti, May 4, 2012