Goddamned Bats/Quotes

"Why do so many games have so many fucking bats?"

—James Rolfe, The Angry Video Game Nerd, "Dracula"

Pippin: I am being eaten alive! Midgewater! There are more midges than water!

Sam: What do they live on when they can't get hobbit?

—The Lord of the Rings

"No-one likes the Skysmashers."

—Daniel Remar, on flying turret enemies in Iji

"Zubat's SUPERSONIC keeps confusing my Pokemon. I'm really upset about that!"

—Firebreather Bill, Pokemon HeartGold and SoulSilver

Every first-person game seems to have these tiny little enemies that hop at your face, are hard to hit and, worse of all, are unsatisfying to kill. How many of us were enthralled with Elder Scrolls: Oblivion during the opening prison escape, only to find ourselves in a cave with a rusty sword, trying to kill freaking rats? Seriously? Rats? In the game that was supposed to change gaming forever?

—David Wong, Cracked.com, The 7 Commandments All Video Games Should Obey

"Oh, and there's an imp that follows you around spouting riddles and insults. If you try to attack the imp, it just floats out of the way and laughs at you. If you ignore the imp, it will keep needling you by mocking you, stealing your stuff, transmuting your stuff into useless items, or stealing your weapon and hitting you with it until you try to attack it..."

"I'd like to make an aside here and say this: Mount Moon has made me hate Zubats to no end. Zubat Zubat Zubat. Endless fucking swarms of of god, fucking, damnable Zubats. I was breathing Zubats with every breath. I couldn't move my arm without hitting a dozen Zubats into about a hundred other Zubats, causing them all to get pissed off and start dive bombing me. I am covered with Zubat bites."

—Red Chocobo, Let's Play Pokemon Fire Red

"Baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaats!!"

—TheHelldragon, too many playthroughs to count ^[1]

"These little guys still kill you more than anything else, don't they?"

—Amorphous on Biters.

"The level itself is straightforward and uneventful, but the bats - my god, the BATS! They never end!!! THE BATS! THE BATS! (...) Anyways, your good friend the Byakhee will drop off Restiana at the final chamber, where she promptly transforms into a tentacled purple dragon thing (hey, now I understand the final boss in Earnest Evans!) and kills you dead because you're bleeding from a thousand bat-bites! Go home, loser!"

—Scythemantis, in his blog, on the last level of El Viento

1. ↑ at one point when he says this in the Kingdom Hearts II playthrough, somewhere in Halloween Town, it actually drags on for so long that Skype cuts it off!