Professional Widow

"Professional Widow" is a 1996 song written by singer-songwriter Tori Amos. It is a harpsichord-driven rock dirge and was included on her 1996 album Boys for Pele. The eponymous "professional widow" is widely rumoured to be Courtney Love, widow of Kurt Cobain, whom Trent Reznor blames for the destruction of the friendship (whatever its extent) between himself and Amos.[2] In 1999, Reznor's band Nine Inch Nails released a single called "Starfuckers, Inc.", with "Starfucker" being a word that appears in "Professional Widow".

"Professional Widow"
Single by Tori Amos
from the album Boys for Pele
Released
  • July 2, 1996 (US)
  • December 30, 1996 (UK)[1]
GenreAlternative rock
Length
  • 4:31 (album version)
  • 8:08 (remix)
LabelAtlantic Records
Songwriter(s)Tori Amos
Producer(s)Tori Amos
Tori Amos singles chronology
"Talula"
(1996)		 "Professional Widow"
(1996)		 "Hey Jupiter"
(1996)

"Professional Widow" was released in July 1996 as the third single from the Boys for Pele album in the US, containing remixes by house music producers Armand van Helden and MK. The single reached number one on the Billboard Hot Dance Music/Club Play chart. In Italy, the original version peaked at number two in October 1996.

An edited version of the Armand's Star Trunk Funkin' Mix of "Professional Widow" was originally released as a double A-side single with "Hey Jupiter" in Europe and Australia. In December 1996, the single was released as an A-side in Europe, under the expanded title "Professional Widow (It's Got to Be Big)", which topped the UK Singles Chart in January 1997 and reached the top 20 in Finland, Iceland, Ireland and Norway. This release contained additional remixes of the track by Mr. Roy.

Background

In a 1998 interview with Music & Media, Amos commented on the song: "It did kick my ass a bit, (...) I know what Van Helden took and what he did and I think he did some very clever things. Obviously they're two different pieces of work, the original Professional Widow is such a different read and I loved the fact that he didn't try and retain that at all, he went completely to the other pole."

Lyrical content

Lyrically the song borrows directly from the short story "The Sphinx" by Edgar Allan Poe. Specifically the lyric "what is termed a landslide of principal proportion" is taken from the line "what is termed a land-slide, of the principal portion of its trees"; and the lyric "prism perfect" from the line "in shape a perfect prism."

Critical reception

Cynthia Joyce from Salon commented in her review of Boys for Pele, that Amos' "penchant for abrupt endings and ad nauseam repetition; still surfaces on more experimental songs like "Professional Widow"".[3]

Music video

A video was made for the "Star Trunk Funkin' Mix," but it was simply a collection of clips from other Tori Amos videos edited together. It is the only video from between 1991 and 1998 that does not appear on Tori Amos: Complete Videos 1991-1998.

One can see Amos playing "Professional Widow" live on the Welcome to Sunny Florida DVD. The performance features Jon Evans on bass and Matt Chamberlain on drums, while Amos plays the piano. This version mutes out any instances of "fucker," and the last word, "cock".

Personnel

Boys for Pele version

  • Tori Amos: harpsichord, Bösendorfer piano, vocals
  • Alan Friedman: drum programming (including the cry of a bull, which was actually credited as "bull: Bull" in the Boys for Pele liner notes)
  • George Porter Jr.: bass guitar
  • Manu Katche: drums
  • Steve Caton: guitar

Singles and compilations

US "Professional Widow" single

CD single

  1. "Professional Widow" (LP Mix) – 4:31
  2. "Professional Widow" (Armand's Star Trunk Funkin' Mix) – 8:08
  3. "Professional Widow" (MK Mix) – 7:20
  4. "Professional Widow" (Just Da Funk Dub) – 3:44
  5. "Professional Widow" (MK Vampire Dub) – 6:56
  6. "Professional Widow" (Armand's Instrumental) – 5:35
  7. "Professional Widow" (Bonus Beats) – 4:31

12" single

  1. "Professional Widow" (Armand's Star Trunk Funkin' Mix) – 8:08
  2. "Professional Widow" (Just Da Funk Dub) – 3:44
  3. "Professional Widow" (MK Mix) – 7:20
  4. "Professional Widow" (MK Vampire Dub) 6:56

UK "Hey Jupiter/Professional Widow" double A-side single

CD single

  1. "Hey Jupiter" (The Dakota Version) – 6:03
  2. "Professional Widow" (Armand's Star Trunk Funkin' Mix) (Radio Edit) – 3:45
  3. "Sugar" (Live) – 5:43
  4. "Honey" (Live) – 4:19

12" single

  1. "Professional Widow" (Armand's Star Trunk Funkin' Mix) – 8:08
  2. "Hey Jupiter" (The Dakota Version) (Radio Edit) – 4:14
  3. "Talula" (BT's Synethasia Mix) – 11:27

Cassette single

  1. "Hey Jupiter" (The Dakota Version) – 6:03
  2. "Professional Widow" (Armand's Star Trunk Funkin' Mix) (Radio Edit) – 3:45

UK "Professional Widow (It's Got to Be Big)" single

CD single

  1. "Professional Widow" (Armand's Star Trunk Funkin' Mix) (Radio Edit) – 3:45
  2. "Professional Widow" (Mr Roy's 7" Edit)
  3. "Professional Widow" (Armand's Star Trunk Funkin' Mix) – 8:08
  4. "Professional Widow" (Mr Roy's Cosmic Cottage Mix)
  5. "Professional Widow" (Just Da Funk Dub)

12" single

  1. "Professional Widow" (Mr Roy's Cosmic Cottage)
  2. "Professional Widow" (Mr Roy's 7" Edit)
  3. "Professional Widow" (Armands Star Trunk Funkin' Mix)
  4. "Professional Widow" (Just Da Funk Dub)

Cassette single

  1. "Professional Widow" (Mr Roy's 7" Edit)
  2. "Professional Widow" (Armands Star Trunk Funkin' Mix)

Compilations

Following the release of Boys for Pele, on which it first appeared, "Professional Widow" has been featured on several releases.

  • 1996 – The LP version is featured on the Escape from L.A. soundtrack.
  • 1996 – The "Merry Widow version", a live version performed on an organ during her 1996 tour, appeared on the Hey Jupiter EP.
  • 1997 – Boys for Pele was reissued in the UK and Australia featuring both the LP version and the full-length Star Trunk Funkin' Mix back-to-back. Consequently, the track "In the Springtime of His Voodoo" is cut from the album.
  • 2003 – The compilation CD Tales of a Librarian seats the radio edit of the Star Trunk Funkin' Mix between two other Boys for Pele songs.
  • 2005 – The digital version of Boys for Pele was made available on iTunes, featuring the same track listing as the 1997 UK reissue.
  • 2006 – The digital iTunes Essentials collection includes the full length (8:06) Star Trunk Funkin' Mix in their Tori Amos best-of playlist, categorized as one of "The Basics".
  • 2006 – The box set compilation A Piano: The Collection includes the Star Trunk Funkin' Mix edit as well as the Merry Widow Live Version, but again, not the album version. The "Merry Widow" version featured here is an edit, which fades out some of Amos' dialog heard on the original Hey Jupiter EP.
  • 2016 – the Boys For Pele" 2 CD Deluxe includes remasted album version as well the Star Trunk Funkin' Mix edit & the Merry Widow Live Version.

Remixes
  • "Professional Widow" (LP mix/original version) – 4:31
  • "Professional Widow" (Armand's Star Trunk Funkin' Mix) – 8:08
  • "Professional Widow" (Armand's Star Trunk Funkin' Mix) (radio edit) – 3:45
  • "Professional Widow" (Armand's Instrumental) – 5:35
  • "Professional Widow" (Bonus Beats) – 4:31
  • "Professional Widow" (Just Da Funk Dub) – 3:44
  • "Professional Widow" (MK Mix) – 7:20
  • "Professional Widow" (MK Vampire Dub) – 6:56
  • "Professional Widow" (Mr Roy's 7" Edit) – 3:51
  • "Professional Widow" (Mr Roy's Cosmic Cottage Mix) – 7:58

Charts

Certifications
Region CertificationCertified units/sales
Australia (ARIA)[31] Gold 35,000^
United Kingdom (BPI)[1] Silver 200,000^

^shipments figures based on certification alone

Covers
  • Hard rock act The Good Year Pimps released a version of the song for the compilation, Wouldn't It Be Great To Have All These Songs on One Album. This release also contains a cover of Amos' song "Iieee."
  • Dance/jazz Nite Flyte recorded a version of the "Star Trunk Funkin' Mix" for their album 30,000 Feet, revisioning it is a laid-back groove.
  • A cover of the "Star Trunk Funkin' Mix" was done by trance group Money Order.
  • The Vitamin String Quartet included an "album mix"-inspired version on their 2nd Tori Amos tribute compendium.
gollark: Thus, lyricLy = hellBoio confirmed.
gollark: That's what HelloBoi might say maybe.
gollark: No.
gollark: Why not use a *white*board?
gollark: What if it starts autosending replies for some reason?

See also

References
  1. "British single certifications – Tori Amos – Professional Widow (It's Got to Be Big)". British Phonographic Industry. Retrieved February 23, 2020.
  2. "An Interview With Trent Reznor". Spin (March 1996). Archived from the original on February 24, 2004. Retrieved February 9, 2013.
  3. Joyce, Cynthia. "AMOS 'N' RANDY". Salon. Retrieved August 9, 2020.
  4. "Australian-charts.com – Tori Amos – Hey Jupiter / Professional Widow". ARIA Top 50 Singles. Retrieved February 23, 2020.
  5. "Austriancharts.at – Tori Amos – Professional Widow (It's Got to Be Big)" (in German). Ö3 Austria Top 40. Retrieved February 23, 2020.
  6. "Ultratop.be – Tori Amos – Hey Jupiter / Professional Widow" (in Dutch). Ultratop 50. Retrieved February 23, 2020.
  7. "Ultratop.be – Tori Amos – Hey Jupiter / Professional Widow" (in French). Ultratop 50. Retrieved February 23, 2020.
  8. "Ultratop Dance 21/09/1996". Ultratop. Retrieved May 16, 2018.
  9. "Top RPM Dance/Urban: Issue 9726." RPM. Library and Archives Canada. Retrieved February 23, 2020.
  10. "Eurochart Hot 100 Singles" (PDF). Music & Media. Vol. 14 no. 4. January 25, 1997. p. 23. Retrieved February 23, 2020.
  11. "Tori Amos: Professional Widow (It's Got to Be Big)" (in Finnish). Musiikkituottajat – IFPI Finland. Retrieved February 23, 2020.
  12. "Lescharts.com – Tori Amos – Professional Widow (It's Got to Be Big)" (in French). Les classement single. Retrieved February 23, 2020.
  13. "Offiziellecharts.de – Tori Amos – Professional Widow (It's Got to Be Big)". GfK Entertainment Charts. Retrieved February 23, 2020.
  14. "Íslenski Listinn Topp 40 (NR. 209 Vikuna 20.2. '97 – 26.2. '97)" (PDF). Dagblaðið Vísir (in Icelandic). Retrieved July 11, 2018.
  15. "The Irish Charts – Search Results – Professional Widow". Irish Singles Chart. Retrieved February 23, 2020.
  16. "Top National Sellers" (PDF). Music & Media. Vol. 13 no. 40. October 5, 1996. p. 20. Retrieved November 26, 2019.
  17. "Nederlandse Top 40 – week 45, 1996" (in Dutch). Dutch Top 40 Retrieved April 17, 2018.
  18. "Dutchcharts.nl – Tori Amos – Professional Widow (It's Got to Be Big)" (in Dutch). Single Top 100. Retrieved February 23, 2020.
  19. "Norwegiancharts.com – Tori Amos – Professional Widow (It's Got to Be Big)". VG-lista. Retrieved February 23, 2020.
  20. "Official Scottish Singles Sales Chart Top 100". Official Charts Company. Retrieved April 17, 2018.
  21. "Swedishcharts.com – Tori Amos – Professional Widow (It's Got to Be Big)". Singles Top 100. Retrieved February 23, 2020.
  22. "Swisscharts.com – Tori Amos – Professional Widow (It's Got to Be Big)". Swiss Singles Chart. Retrieved February 23, 2020.
  23. "Official Singles Chart Top 100". Official Charts Company. Retrieved February 23, 2020.
  24. "Official Dance Singles Chart Top 40". Official Charts Company. Retrieved February 23, 2020.
  25. "Tori Amos Chart History (Bubbling Under Hot 100)". Billboard. Retrieved April 17, 2018.
  26. "Tori Amos Chart History (Dance Club Songs)". Billboard. Retrieved April 17, 2018.
  27. "Tori Amos Chart History (Dance Singles Sales)". Billboard. Retrieved February 23, 2020.
  28. "1997 ARIA Singles Chart". ARIA. Retrieved March 11, 2016.
  29. "1997 Year-End Sales Charts: Eurochart Hot 100 Singles" (PDF). Music & Media. Retrieved December 20, 2019.
  30. "Top 100 Singles 1997". Music Week. January 17, 1998. p. 27.
  31. "ARIA Charts – Accreditations – 1997 Singles". Australian Recording Industry Association. Retrieved February 23, 2020.
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