< The Brak Show

The Brak Show/Funny


  • Anytime Dad opens his mouth, expect to hear the funniest thing you'll ever hear in your life.
    • "I am sick of being pushed around like a stolen shopping cart full of rotten pumpkin meat!"
    • "You found your real parents?"
    • "Mother, people only invite you to dinner for three reasons: to sell you vitamins, to drug you and take unpleasant snapshots, or to convert you to their hideous farming religion!
    • "You say sewers, I say waterslide."
    • "Brak! Stop driving your little baby car around Saint Babiesburg and take your asteroid smashing like a man!"
    • "Moustache. No moustache."
    • "You drive around, you run a light...maybe you honk at the ladies and they say (high girly voice) 'Hey, chief! Where'd you get the new ride, ah?' And you say: (ridiculous frat guy voice) 'It's Parko's, maahn. I'm just keepin' it for him while he's in the joint. See ya later, maahn.' Then you drive away, so proud to be a nose-possessing man."
  • The entirety of the final episode.
  • This dialogue in "Sexy New Brak Show Go"

Brak: 'Dad can I open the box even though it's not a recognized mealtime? Can I? Can I? Huh? Can I?
Dad: Ask your mother.
Brak: Mom, can I open the box?
Mom: Ask your father.
Brak: Dad can I open the box?
Dad: Ask your father.
Brak: Dad, how about that box?
Dad: Say it like a princess.
Brak: (girly voice) Father, may I open the box?
Dad: No no no, Princess the Cat
Brak: I don't do her.
Dad: Then you don't open the box! ... but I love you very much!

  • The episode "Goldfish" during Brak's mini freakout when he finds out he can't go to the Carnival of Feet right away, complete with loud yelling and exorcist head twisting.
    • Same episode, Don Tickles, Notary Public.
    • Same episode:

Brak: Don't talk to me mom, I'm a murderer!
Mom: Oh, dear.
Brak: I'm going to bed, but I don't see how I'll ever get to sleep!
Brak: *in bed* Man, I love sleeping! *snore* Oh, I wish I could wake up so I could go back to sleep again! *snore*

    • And again:

Brak: Mr. Tickles, how do you think Thundercleese is going to take this?
Mr. Tickles: Oh, my god! He'll tear your arms off!
Brak: But I love my arms! That's where my hands live!

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