The Baby Jesus Butt Plug

WARNING: DO NOT MOLEST THE BABY JESUS

In a dystopic world where human beings are photocopied instead of born, and people are slaves to corporations, anyone with enough cash can buy a pet baby that looks like anyone they like, from John Lennon to Jesus. A young couple buy themselves a baby jesus from a litter for the apparently common practice of using it for anal sex - so common, in fact, that the owner of the baby jesus warns them against exactly that. They don't listen, though, and that's where things start to get weird...

The Baby Jesus Butt Plug is a short story written by Carlton Melick III and can be found in the anthology The Bizarro Starter Kit.

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Tropes used in The Baby Jesus Butt Plug include:

• Bizarro Fiction: What was your first guess?
• Body Horror: Oh lord yes...
• Cloning Blues: There are apparently no children, only adults and babies bred as designer pets.
• Defictionalization: https://web.archive.org/web/20130915004130/http://divine-interventions.com/baby.php. See also here.
• It Got Worse: Trust the breeder. She knows what she's talking about.
• Nightmare Fuel Station Attendant: Most of the characters see nothing wrong with breeding babies as pets or using them as sex toys.
• Oh Crap: Several moments, particularly at the very end.
• Really Seven Hundred Years Old: The CEO at the corporation where the main character works, who appears to be seven years old and wants him to play dollies with her, claims to be hundreds of years old.
• Surreal Horror: Really, just start with a default state of WTF and you should be fine.