< Stargate Universe

Stargate Universe/Funny


  • Eli's running commentary of the Apocalyptic Log in "Time", but particularly.

[In the video, Rush runs off during a fire fight with alien creatures]
Video!Eli: Where are you going! You're crazy! He's crazy!
[Cut back to the crew watching the video]
Eli: [turns to Rush] You are!
Rush: [shrugs]

  • Also in the episode "Earth", in the first glitch with the communication stones. Colonel Young is having sex with his wife, when suddenly he and Telford switch consciousness for a few seconds, right at *ahem* a very important part in the action. When they switch back again, it goes something like this:

Scott: Telford? Sir?
Telford: O__O
Scott: Sir? Sir?
Telford: *blink*

  • In "Divided", the communication stones are used to bring a doctor from Earth. She becomes increasingly mortified by the weird conditions on the ship (alien venom as an anesthetic, a makeshift fiber optic camera made from a hovering camera ball, and the fact that the ship is being attacked). TJ simply responds, "Welcome to Destiny." Hmm, that has a certain ring to it.
  • Chloe tries to justify having picked up archeology to Colonel Young, with Eli's help.

Eli: Say something archaeological.
Chloe: Stratification!
Eli: That's good.
Chloe: Thank you.

    • Counts as an in-universe CMOF, as their rather long and awkward string of justifications ends with Young chuckling to himself once they leave the room.
    • Later on, Eli claims that he called Greer out for being afraid as a joke. Because he thought that they were on that level in their relationship.

Greer: I'm going to stay up here and cover your backs.
Eli: What are you, scared? *Greer gives him a stare* That was a joke. I'm sorry, I must have mistakenly thought we were on that level now. You know, friends who can kid each other like that? *Greer removes shades and switches to a full blown death stare* Please don't kill me?

    • Same episode, when the away team have to call in a rescue team due to the aftermath of a spider attack, and having to explain it to Young.

Scott: It was a sizable spider, sir.

  • O'Neill is good for these.

Telford: What makes us so special?
O'Neill: I know what makes me special.

  • Greer vs. Alien Fruit. Both times ("Justice" and "Faith"). The first time, he pretends the "alien sweet potato" tastes delicious ( which was a little too generous). The second time, he eats a completely random fruit to the horror of the rest of the off-world team.

TJ: We don't even know if it's poisonous!
Greer: (deadpan) We will.

    • Greer vs. Alien Wildlife. "Is it something we can barbecue?"
    • Then again, in "The Hunt": Greer and Varro are carrying a wounded corporal back to the gate. They suddenly see a "space deer". Next scene: "Becker's Barbecue" on Destiny.
  • Eli and Young's exchange about the returning crew members' explanation in "Visitation."

Eli: "Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic." -Arthur C. Clarke
Young: "Turn the mic back on." -Winston Churchill

    • Apparently, Young starts to get how to make Eli understand what he wants (from "Resurgence"):

Young: (about how Eli should send a signal to an alien ship) "Ancient, English, Bat-Signal, and whatever else you've got."

  • Volker on seeing the alien ship in "The Greater Good"

Volker: (deadpan) "New friends. Yay."

    • In a later episode, when Rush dryly comments on their status, Brody joins in:

Rush: Well at least we have a full tank of gas.

  • Sarcastically in unison*

Volker / Brody: Yaaaay.

  • The Kino mini-episodes can be full of funny:
    • "We... turned him purple."
    • Eli taking a Kino on a tour of the ship and getting lost.

Eli: And this room is... *looks around in confusion* I don't think I've been in here before... *wanders off camera*

    • Scott catching people watching South Park when they should be exercising, and how they get him to go away:

Scott: [About running two miles] I can do it under 23 minutes.
Eli: Really? Funny, because there's a protein bar here that says you can't.
[Scott runs off, everyone goes back to watching South Park]

  • When Brody attempts to turn off Also Sprach Zarathustra in "Hope", the Numa Numa song comes on.
    • Also in "Hope", this little exchange in the medlab:

Park: Still a lot of potential post-operative drawbacks. Infection, high blood pressure, erec..tile..dys..function...(trails off)
(beat)
[Brody, TJ and Park try and fail to stifle their laughter.]
Volker: Why is that funny?

  • This:

Rush: You've come a long way from the videogame slacker I met one year ago.
Eli: Thanks... You've been pretty consistent.

Volker: What's Rush's country called? Rushia?
Eli: ...Futura.
Volker: ...what the hell kind of name is Futura?
Brody: What's wrong with Futura?
Eli: Well, they say that you (indicates Brody) came up with it.

    • When everyone realizes where Yaozu's little words of wisdom come from.

Yaozu: "It is easier to know where you are going if you know where you have been." Eli Wallace.
Everyone Else: (awkward silence)

    • More Futura humor.

Volker: Maybe Futura helped.
Park: Isn't that a font?
Brody: Will you shut up about the name?

Eli: Me and...Private Barnes?
Chloe: You know...if you want to pursue that?

    • One of the last Kino recordings is of Brody...complaining.

Brody: All these kids...running around, dancing. Always dancing. Tearing up my lawn! When I was a kid, people had respect-- (recording shuts off)

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