< Paranoia (game)

Paranoia (game)/Funny


  • This Tropers RPG group has a standing house rule that any briefing that goes by without a death is regarded as a failure. As such, much hilarity has ensued. Par example, these 3 consecutive sessions:

    Friend Computer: The medical chimpanzees are waiting outside. Who would like to play a game of ping pong?
    Two-thirds of the players assent to this, albiet cautiously.
    Friend Computer: Ping pong is an unsanctioned game. Only sanctioned games provide sufficient happiness. Report for re-education

        • Re-education, incidently, consisted of being attacked by the aforesaid (Computer controlled) monkeys

    Friend Computer: This concludes the briefing. Who would like to play a game of poker?

    Beat

    One guy raises his hand

    Friend Computer: A desire to play poker indicates a desire to spread wealth. Spreading wealth is communism. Communism is treason.

    Turret drops from the ceiling and frags him

    Friend Computer: Have a nice daycycle.

      Friend computer: Who would like to play a game of Trivial Pursuit?

      The players, wary by now, keep silent

      Friend Computer: Unwillingness to play games indicates an unnaturally low level of happiness. Happiness is mandatory. You will all be dispatched to the Happiness Enhancement room.

          • A death trap obstacle course, naturally
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