Non-Indicative Name/Quotes

"The Lord Privy Seal is neither a lord, a privy nor a seal."

—Ted Heath (attributed)

"THE WIND FISH IN NAME ONLY, FOR IT IS NEITHER."

—Owl statue, The Legend of Zelda: Link's Awakening

"The French Foreign Legion was neither French, Foreign, nor a Legion. Discuss."

—Linda Richards (Mike Myers), Saturday Night Live

"The reason it's called Grape Nuts is that it contains dextrose, which is also sometimes called grape sugar, and also because Grape Nuts is catchier, in terms of marketing, than A Cross Between Gerbil Food and Gravel, which is what it tastes like.

—Dave Barry, Tips for Writer's

"You call it a goblin punch. Even though it was very clearly a kick. And there isn't a goblin in within a thousand mile radius."

—Thief, Eight Bit Theater

"It's like a movie called Horses! Horses! Horses!, and there's not a single fucking horse in the whole movie!"

—Kung-Fu Jesus, Let's Play Sonic the Hedgehog 2006

"What the fuck? You can't even trust the damn title!"

—The Angry Video Game Nerd on Plumbers Don't Wear Ties

Doug: Hey Klaus, why is it that Hamburg and Frankfurt have nothing to do with hamburgers or hot dogs?

Janitor, a.k.a. "Klaus": Vhy iz your Lake Titicaca not filled viz boobs und poop?

—Scrubs

"The Holy Roman Empire is neither Holy, nor Roman, nor an Empire"

—Voltaire

"OK, so he called it "Let's Play" but he's not really talking; he called it Worms but it's not Worms; so "Part 1" is maybe the only truthful part of this except there's no "Part 2" yet and I guess judging by that there never will be!"

"Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue."
That's what they say, but it just isn't true.
Roses are red, and apples are too,
But violets are violet. Violets aren't blue.
An orange is orange, but Greenland's not green
And a pinky's not pink. So what does it mean?
To call something blue when it's not, we defile it.

But ah, what the heck: it's hard to rhyme "violet."

—Dot Warner, Animaniacs

"THAT WAS ONLY ONE SECRET AND IT WAS NOT JOLLY AT ALL"

—An Adventure Time viewer, referring to the episode "Holly Jolly Secrets"

"I dunno. It's like everyone just decides what it means and passes their jugement and expects me to behave in a cerain way. I mean, first of all, it's my name, like my actual, this-is-what-my-birth-certificate-says NAME. It doesn't reflect me as a person. And hey, words can mean more than one thing, you know? Just because the first thing YOU think of is some happy-go-lucky sap doesn't mean..."

—Mr. Upbeat, Rhythm Heaven Fever