Mark Reads Harry Potter

In the blog of Mark Reads Harry Potter, SHIT GETS REAL AND YOU ARE NOT PREPARED! Intrigued? Then it's time for Mark to read Harry Potter.

MARK READS HARRY POTTER

After suffering through Twilight, Mark decided to embark on the project of reading Harry Potter (which he'd never read before) and review it on his blog one chapter at a time and even though at the beginning he was not quite sold now it's REAL HARD because THIS SERIES IS SO AMAZING AND ADDICTIVE AND J. K. Rowling IS A FUCKING GENIUS! HE WAS NOT PREPARED FOR THIS SHIT! CHECK IT OUT RIGHT NOW!

The result was an epic, five-month journey through all seven books of the Harry Potter series, finishing the series on October 30th, 2010. He's now re-reading the series.

See also Mark Reads Twilight. Mark is also now branching into other series, including Firefly, The Hunger Games and Doctor Who. Check them out!


Tropes used in Mark Reads Harry Potter include:

I don’t feel she’s evil anymore. Shoot me. I know we’re supposed to think she’s this forboding character who will fuck everything up, but come on. She cannot be that bad just because she’s “traditional” in some sense. I mean, she will probably be difficult, but it’ll be an interesting way to bring up some sort of conflict between Harry and her. Or maybe Hermione. But yeah. I’m not buying this whole “YOU SHOULD TOTALLY HATE HER IMMEDIATELY” thing.

    • You can guess how he responded to the following two chapters.
  • Killed Mid-Sentence: Poor Hedwig :'(

2020: THAT’S IT. AS SOON AS I GET OUT OF THIS CAGE, I’M GOING TO START PECKING EYES OUT. IT’S ABOUT TIME HEDWIG GOT HER REV—

HARRY: You wouldn't believe it. I just spied on a secret conversation between Snape.
[Dramatic music.]
HARRY: He is TOTALLY planning on stealing the Sorcerer's Stone.
[Music rises in pitch and tempo.]
HARRY: I think Quirrell put some anti-Dark Arts spell on the room, too!]
[Music reaches a crescendo.]
RON: WHERE IS THAT MUSIC COMING FROM?
HARRY: I don't know. It's been following me all day.
HERMIONE: Wait, so...Quirrell is the only thing protecting the Sorcerer's Stone?
RON: Dudes. That's like trying to protect a vault with tissue paper.
NEVILLE: DUN DUN DUN.
[They all turn to look at NEVILLE.]
NEVILLE: What? I thought it fit.

  • "Not Making This Up" Disclaimer: sometimes shows up in his footnotes when quoting directly from the source material during his Harry Potter: A Play reviews.
  • Old Shame: Mark's reviews of the first few chapter of the first book were snarky and condescending. Then he was won over by the chapter where Hagrid shows up at the Hut-on-the-Rock and then all was right with the world.
    • Those first few chapters were a holdover from the other series he'd read and blogged about. Mark hated Twilight with a passion.
    • He's by no means the first Harry Potter reader to find that Philosopher's Stone gets off to a slow start.
  • Perverse Sexual Lust: Mark has declared Hagrid his leather daddy boyfriend.
  • Review Blog
  • Script Fic: the Harry Potter: A Play segments, another holdover from his Twilight reviews.
  • Something Completely Different: Mark has reviewed chapters from the point of view of characters, including Hedwig more than once, transcribed IM conversations he had with his friend Kasper while reading the chapter for the first time, and more.
  • Twitter: Mark wrote one review in-character as Colin Creevey tweeting Harry's every action.
  • X Meets Y: Mark's posts are part MST, part Review Blog, part After Action Report, part role-play...
  • You Are Not Ready: YOU ARE NOT PREPARED.
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