Malcolm in the Middle/Headscratchers

• Pretty minor, but in the episode where one of Francis' coworkers in Alaska (really old guy) sends for a mail-order bride and it turns out to be an inflatable likeness of some actress, he says he must have misread the product. My question: how could someone misread blow-up doll as bride?
  • Russian magazine? The ad being extremely vague about what it was offering? The guy's actually senile?
  • I'm pretty sure it was a scam.

• What happened to that girl Nicki that Malcolm was dating? I haven't seen the episodes in a linear fashion, and they seemed to have a pretty good relationship.
  • Hal kicks Malcolm out, so Malcolm hides out in Nicki's attic for a few days. She dumps him when he keeps whining about his life and not listening to any of her problems. She seemed to go back and forth about whether his complaining was endearing or annoying up until this episode, so it's probably having to spend an extended amount of time with him that wore her down.
  • The same thing happened with that cheerleader girl who liked Reese and even got past his instinctive behaviour of constantly pranking or harassing her.
    • That is, she just suddenly disappeared (I'm currently rewatching the series in order, and I don't remember her showing up after that episode, despite sort of watching for her reappearance). Reese didn't hide in her attic or even, as far as I recall, get any closure.

• How could the episode "If Boys were Girls" be the only instance where a child welfare agent suspect the family of abusing the boys? Wouldn't their frequent criminal behavour be enough evidence to investigate their home?
  • Only Reese ever does anything serious as Francis is always away now.
    • It also may be possible that they did come to the household about the boys, but were somehow scared off from doing anything about it. In the episode Hal goes insane and tries to board the boys up in their rooms due to the realization the family don't have medical coverage, Reese threatens to contact them, saying "and they'll show up this time!"

• Malcom's current personality transitioned from an epiphany, so what was going on when Lois was preaching her animal instincts at telling who is feeling what? Malcom's stupid acts at times clearly indicates emotional stress damage.

• For someone so proactive in well-oiled discipline, Lois never put much thought on Hal after a long period of time. It's kind of sad that she can consistently scream her children into submission while Hal, who is much older but carries an average teenage mentality, is always off the hook. It isn't like he skipped work every Friday right?
  • Also, its quite clear that Lois is trying to become the female, adult version of Malcom. Even if the extent is nowhere implied, it just seems like her ability to redirect imperfection with logic has an uncanny similarity with Malcom.
  • Well, in the episode when she finds that out (skipping work every Friday), the revelation gets him out of a lengthy jail sentence, and she does scream at him for it. Also he is meeker and doesn't cause near as much trouble as his sons (or is better at hiding it, or cleaning it up). That, and when his boys cause trouble or things go wrong, he has to deal with the fallout as much as she does, whereas Lois main beef with the boys is how little they comprehend responsibility or the realities of life she and Hal have to live through. Hal doesn't usually break the law or cause senseless trouble for the family with his shenanigans.

• Given some of Francis' depraved actions (and despite what he likes to claim, it was implied that he was always like that and didn't become that due to parental abuse), why didn't Hal and Lois send Francis to an insane asylum? Logically, that would have been the most appropriate place for someone like him, not a military school, given that he is pretty much insane and needs psychological help (assuming, of course, he could be helped).
  • Francis' actions are definitely better the longer he is out of his home. Maybe the only psychological help he needed was to get out of there!
  • "Insane" is really, really stretching it. Francis isn't delusional, he's not out of touch with reality, he's got delinquent tendencies and acts out against authority. If that's "insane," then half of today's youth should be in straight jackets.
    • Tell that to his toddler self pouring gasoline/lighter fluid onto his teddy bear with the intention of setting it on fire, or his child self torturing his brothers, or apparently scarring Reese with a bayonette. Heck, not only was Francis doing something like that before his mom got strict, but the incident with the bear is the reason why Lois snapped and became strict. Besides, just because someone's neither out of touch with reality nor delusional doesn't mean they aren't insane. I mean, look at Kefka Palazzo or Professor Hojo.
      • You're placing the blame on a toddler? seriously? I mean, yeah, whay he did was pretty awful, but that's only because of Hal and Lois shitty parental skills. Each and every one of the boys demonstrated that they were actually *better* without Hal or Lois' influence on them(Hell, Dewey self-taught himself piano). I'm not saying they are entirely to blame either, but having some therapy for their own fucked up upbringing would have helped the family A LOT