Keiki

Beefer steals the spotlight from Keiki and Andrea...again.^[1]

There are a lot of crazy people you think wouldn't live in Hawaii, but probably do.

—Peter Paltridge, Platypus Comix Official Collection 4: The Secrets of George Lucas's Fortress of Solitude

Peter Paltridge, the host of Platypus Comix, created Keiki in 2002. The comic features various grade-school age children living in Honolulu, Hawaii, such as Badbutt Beefer Kekoalauliilnapalihauliuliokekoolau, Token Evil Teammate Ivan, Too Clever by Half Keiki Kikilaka (named after the Hawaiian word for "child"), and Cloudcuckoolander Andrea. The series avoids portraying Hawaii as an island paradise, through its eccentric cast and outrageous occurrences. Word of God says this comic was supposed to represent the "real" Hawaii, but it seems to have drifted farther and farther away from that premise.

Tropes used in Keiki include:

• Aborted Arc: "Keiki's Huge Christmas Epic" began in December 2002, then received a new chapter each December for the next several years. However, it hasn't received a new chapter since 2007. Word of God says there was never a plan for a story (only the first two parts really had anything to do with Christmas) and the previous parts didn't get many hits.
• Adults Are Useless: The main reason Beefer and Ivan turned out so ill-behaved. Specifically, Beefer's mother seems rather gullible, and Ivan's mother seems rather neglective.
• Alliterative Name: Keiki Kikilaka, Marie Magnolia (Ivan's mother and owner of a local restaurant), Tawny Twangstern (a Southern girl who has become the object of Beefer's crush)
• All Just a Dream: Any comic in which wheelchair-bound Amara becomes popular. The dreamer even sees this trope coming a page in advance during one of the instances.
• Artistic License History: In "Take Your Keiki To Work Day," Keiki and her older sister, Queenie Waheenie, watch a documentary about Hawaii which teaches that the islands were formed from one of Pele's eggs, portrays King Kamehameha has a dragon, and boasts that Queen Liliuokalani willingly gave Hawaii to America after Americans saved the day and banished Tiki gods to the Phantom Zone.

End of Documentary:...and we live Happily Ever After!
Keiki: Wow, what a load of...
Queenie: Well, some of it's true...I read it on Wikipedia!

• Art Shift:
  • The drawings of Beefer's futuristic vision in "Academia Nuts" all appear to be taken from an old, realistic, full-color comic book.
  • The chase scene in "Deathburger in Paradise" is drawn as crude doodles due to budget constrictions.
• Batman Gambit: During the Student Body President election in "Total Recall," one candidate assumes the alias of "Candidate X," and gains support through advertisements that leave an intriguingly mysterious impression on the other students. Eventually, Candidate X wins the election in a landslide, allowing Keiki to reassume authority over the student body.
• Big Red Button: "Take Your Keiki To Work Day" shows one in one of the subplots. Apparently, if someone forgets to push it every 108 minutes, Hawaii will explode.
• Non Sequitur Episode:
  • "Keiki's Huge Christmas Epic" qualifies, except for the part where Paltridge has Miss Munupi Killed Off for Real. The same chapter reveals that the events rarely affected the main continuity because the whole "Epic" took place in an Alternate Universe.
  • Any issue with Darcy the vampire exceeds the boundaries of reality even further than usual.
• Bland-Name Product: That Guy With the Prematurely Receding Hairline, the website hosting Beefer's review series "The Angry Beefer," and several other shows hosted by No Celebrities Were Harmed versions of TGWTG personalities.
• Breakout Character: If not for the fact the title of the series hasn't changed, one might think Beefer displaced Keiki as the main character, since he's had several days in the limelight.
  • Also, rolling over the Keiki link at the Platypus Comix homepage brings up a drawing of Beefer's eyes, and he was the only Keiki character to show up in the Platypus Comix Tenth Anniversary Ensemble. (Most of the other series were represented by at least two characters)
• Canon Sue: Invoked; since Keiki is the most refined character in the comic, Queenie once called her a Mary Sue.
  • This trait proved useful in "E-Venge of the Nerd:"

Norbit: I HAVE A BAD VIDEO OF YOU TOO!
Keiki: That's a lie. You don't have anything.
Norbit: I do too! I have a video of you, um, doing, um...
Keiki: You don't have anything because I haven't done anything! Now quit bluffing!

• Cassandra Truth: The nerdy things that Darcy did in "Beefer Madness" (such as rambling about DC Comics) caused Beefer to initially disbelieve that she's a vampire.
  • Meanwhile, local TV reporter Natali Marmalade fails to assure panicking Hawaiians that she does not have the bird flu.
• Chekhov's Gag:
  • Ivan interrupts "Total Recall" to recall the time he punched Cameron Diaz on the nose after she accidentally hit him with her surfboard. Later, she joins Beefer and Tawny in beating Ivan up.
  • During a flood in "Beefer in the Time of Cholera", a background character exclaims for help from Seth MacFarlane. He comes eventually, but doesn't provide as much help as originally hoped.
• Cool and Unusual Punishment: Beefer tries to play hooky in "Beefer Madness," but finds all the television channels playing tributes to Jerry Lewis.
• Continuity Nod: After (almost) no one gets what they asked for on Christmas in the first part of "Keiki's Huge Christmas Epic", Beefer exclaims, "If only Johnny McRotten were back in power!" One of Paltridge's abandoned series, Guava Guava, had a comic in which Santa Claus' new rival, Johnny McRotten, rewarded people who misbehave.
• Cool Chair: In "Freewheeling," hovering chairs become the hottest new children's trend.
• Crossover: Happens briefly but semi-frequently in the old comics. Stitch's cameo in "Academia Nuts" is a notable example since Paltridge has acknowledged his movie's trailer as an inspiration for Keiki's tone.
• Cursed with Awesome: "Twilight Princess" saw Darcy return to Hawaii during a surge of popular vampire-related romance books and movies, and gain instant popularity after revealing that she's a vampire. Eventually, she starts finding this condition less awesome after questioning the possibility her new friends like her for what she is instead of who she is. After witnessing celebrities confess themselves to be vampires simply to gain publicity, she finally rants about the negative repercussions.
• Cute Monster Girl: Darcy, such that Beefer even asks her out in "Twilight Princess"
• Demoted to Extra: Keiki got demoted so hard, she didn't make any appearances in the year 2011. Her bio even says her status as the main character is, "debatable."
• Enforced Plug: Beefer gives one in "Beefer Madness."
• Everyone Join the Party: As Keiki chases a vote thief in "Total Recall."
• Everything's Worse with Bears: Subverted in "Total Recall."
• Fake-Out Opening: "Freewheeling" has one.
• First-Name Basis: The kids address Ivan's mother by her first name, Marie.
• Groundhog Day Loop: After Andrea receives an infinite number of December wishes in "Keiki's Huge Christmas Epic", she decides to make her first wish involves turning back time to December 1st.
• Hot Mom: Paltridge considers Marie, "one of those beautiful Hawaiian girls you hear about but rarely actually see there."
• Heterosexual Life Partners: Beefer and Ivan
• Hypocritical Humor: "The Angry Beefer" includes some examples during Beefer's review of Barbie in A Mermaid Tale.

Beefer: Who says "slam you?" Seriously, how froggy can dis ting get?

• Instant Awesome, Just Add Mecha: After "Edison Day" replaces St. Patrick's Day in "The Wrath of the Irish," two robots, named "Magi-Bot" and "Happyrobo," duel over the role of Edison Day's mythical gift-giver.
• Intoxication Ensues: After Keiki drinks Beefer's Super Brain Drink in "Academia Nuts," she engages in several destructive activities, none of which she has any memory of.
• Invisible Parents: Keiki's and Queenie's parents have yet to appear in a comic. Beefer's mom only appears from the neck down, and his father only appears offscreen. Andrea's father has only made one appearance, which probably isn't canonical. The only parent who has made a sufficient number of appearances is Ivan's mother (she's also the only adult with a full bio).
• Ironic Nickname: The Stereotyped Smart Kid only had a C average. He gave up his title after Keiki than him or anyone else in Hawaii.
• It Got Worse: "Beefer in the Time of Cholera" starts with Oahu becoming a Crapsack World during the 2009 recession and eventually shows global warming flooding the island, sparing only Keiki, Queenie, Beefer, Andrea, Ivan, and Tawny. Fortunately, Amara finds all of them (apparently, her wheelchair can float) and takes them all to Oahu's last piece of dry land. Unfortunately, a volcano erupts not long after the group reaches the land, but Amara manages to restore status quo by realizing the comic was All Just a Dream.
• Karmic Jackpot: "Keiki's Huge Christmas Epic" sets into motion when Santa Claus gives Andrea an infinite number of wishes for the rest of December as reward for becoming the only person on Oahu to do good that year.
• Killed Off for Real: Miss Munupi in part six of "Keiki's Huge Christmas Epic". The permanence is confirmed in "Deathburger in Paradise".
• Late Arrival Spoiler: Read "Twilight Princess" before "Beefer Madness", and you'll know right away that Darcy is actually a vampire.
  • Reading the archive's synopsis of "Twilight Princess" also spoils this.
• Let There Be Snow: Andrea's Christmas wish in "Keiki's Huge Christmas Epic Part 1". Unlike the others' wishes, hers actually comes true.
• Milestone Celebration: Averted in the first panel of "Lady Marmalade."
• Nightmare Fuel: Explored in-universe in "Queenie's Kindertrauma." The comic reveals one source of Nightmare Fuel for Queenie: The gruesome animated movie The Miserable Bunnies, which many parents of the '80s apparently rented for their children.
• No Celebrities Were Harmed: Word of God says reporter Natali Marmalade was inspired by Portland television reporter Natali Marmion.
• Non-Standard Character Design: Michelle Rodriguez, who became the new fifth-grade teacher after Miss Munupi's death, is drawn more realistically than the main characters. This also happens to some guest stars.
• Shout-Out:
  • "Christmas Carol II: This Time, It's Seriously Personal!" includes some quotes from A Charlie Brown Christmas on the first page. Beefer's play also consists entirely of Shout Outs.
  • As do Beefer's book report in "E-Venge of the Nerd" and his rap in "Girls Just Don't Understand."
  • "Queenie's Kindertrauma" includes some Burn Notice references.
  • Vess MacMeal from "E-Venge of the Nerd" has a name sounding similar to that of Tress MacNeille, who Paltridge imagined Vess sounding like.
• Skintone Sclerae
• Spin-Off: Scary News with Natali Marmalade, included in Platypus Comix's sister site For Portlanders Only.
  • The one-off comic "Vess MacMeal Starring in: The More You Know!" stars the E-Venge spokeswoman from "E-Venge of the Nerd", but as a woman living in a 1950s-influenced community.
• Spiritual Successor: A Hawaiian vacation Peter Paltridge once took inspired him to try and make a comic about crazy occurrences in an island community. One of his first attempts was Cocktails and Dreams, which only lasted three issues. Paltridge's discontent with this comic led him to try and make one set in Hawaii itself.
• Spotlight-Stealing Squad: Paltridge has admitted that Keiki Kikilaka's status as the main character is "debatable," since the comics focus more often on several of her classmates.
• Stylistic Suck: Word of God said "The Angry Beefer" contains so many examples, Paltridge managed to complete the first nine pages in only two days.
• Surrounded by Idiots: In "Academia Nuts," after Keiki scores higher on a standardized test than anyone else in Hawaii, she begins contemplating the possibility that everyone else is dumber than her. Marie and Andrea fail to alleviate her concerns.
• Third Person Person: Beefer
• Uncanny Family Resemblance: Andrea and her two older brothers.
• Unexplained Recovery: Queenie dies in the hastily-drawn-and-written climax to "Deathburger in Paradise," but reappears in the next comic, which is drawn entirely in Paltridge's typical style.
• Verbal Tic: Beefer's tendency to end sentencies with "brah".
• Written-In Absence: After Keiki and Beefer acknowledge Andrea's absence in "Wrath of the Irish," the story cuts to her and her brothers visiting Neverland.
• Yet Another Christmas Carol: Beefer becomes director of the school play in "Christmas Carol II: This Time, It's Seriously Personal!" and goes out of his way to make sure the school doesn't produce another retelling of the old tale.
• You Can Panic Now: Several of Natali Marmalade's news reports, in both Keiki and Scary News with Natali Marmalade, exaggerate the risk factors of everything from casual video games to babies to playing outside. The issue "Lady Marmalade" detailed Beefer's attempts to end these reports.
• You Mean "Xmas": Ms. Munupi made her students celebrate "Sparkle Day" in the first part of "Keiki's Huge Christmas Epic". One of them accidentally provoked her to refer to Christmas by its actual name, prompting some police to arrest her.

1. ↑ His spotlight will later get stolen by Princess Pi.