Ho Yay/Quotes

Coincidentally, "subtext" is an anagram of "buttsex".

—Fandom Wank Wiki

They slapped each other on the back and poked each other in the stomach, and wrestled, the way men hug each other without hugging.

—Randy Alcorn, Deadline

"Well, you have now, Sam, dear Sam", said Frodo, and he lay back in Sam's gentle arms, closing his eyes, like a child at rest when night-fears are driven away by some loved voice or hand. Sam felt that he could sit like that in endless happiness; but it was not allowed. It was not enough for him to find his master, he had still to try and save him. He kissed Frodo's forehead.

—The Lord of the Rings

Sakura: He looks a little bit like Sasuke-kun.
Naruto: Yeah right! They don't look anything alike! Sasuke looks tons better! Err... no wait, he doesn't look as bad I mean!

Sakura (smiling): You're right, Sasuke-kun does look a little better than Sai.

Naruto: Not just a "little bit!" Sasuke doesn't look anywhere near that bad!

—Naruto

Interviewer: Naruto-kun sees you as a rival but what about you?
Sasuke: Naruto eh ... ? At first I thought he was just a moron who gets in the way, but, frankly, he's been impressing me lately, just a little bit.
Interviewer: What did the kiss with Naruto taste like? Lemon?

Sasuke: Hmmm ... Like Miso I guess ... I mean ... like I remember! Damn Naruto, why would he do that?!

—Naruto

Listen to you two, quarrelling like an old, married couple.

—Severus Snape to Sirius Black and Remus Lupin, Harry Potter and The Prisoner of Azkaban (the movie)

This is quite homoerotic.

—Captain Jack Harkness sums up 90% of Torchwood

Alan Shore: Denny’s my friend. He takes me to nice places, buys me nice things, we like to dress up.

Denny Crane: Flamingos.

—Boston Legal

We're Going to Need a Bigger Closet. Male friends hug, toast their friendship, and later stumble drunkenly to sleep in the cabin's one bed. The reader is way ahead of you - they are secretly gay, and nothing you say later is going to change his mind.

—How Not to Write A Novel

Wha? You are giving the Slash Fic-ers material!

—'Linkara, The Spoony Experiments review of "Warrior" #2-3

Fuck it, we're off to the pride parade!

—The Nostalgia Chick, during her review of She Ra

I love all the gay people of Australia, I find you all very attractive.

—Paul McDermott lampshading the homoerotic subtext that is Good News Week

Rolf fell in love with the guy!

—Eddy, Ed, Edd 'n' Eddy

Oh for the love of God, why didn't you marry Bruce instead of Lois?

—Linkara in his review of Superman: At Earth's End, after Supes waxes a bit too poetic about his dead friend.

Booster Gold: I can't take this anymore! Ever since this team got back together you've been treating me like dirt!
Blue Beetle: Get a grip, Booster, you're acting like some jilted lover.

Booster Gold: Well, that's what it feels like!

—Formerly Known As The Justice League

There was a time, when I was young and gay - but straight!

—Max Bialystock, The Producers

My existence bordered on the tragic - always timid, never took a chance.
Then I felt his magic, and my heart began to dance.
I was always frightened, fraught with worry, 'til him...
I was going nowhere in a hurry, 'til him...
He filled up my empty life, filled it to the brim.

There could never ever be another one... like him!

—Leo Bloom, on Max Bialystock, The Producers

Devon: I'm honestly not trying to make this sound gay.

Jack: No-one is, it's just happening.

—Thirty Rock

Much leads up to a scene in a tent on a mountaintop in the midst of a howling blizzard, when Bella’s teeth start chattering. Obviously a job for the hot-blooded Jacob and not the cold-blooded Edward, and as Jacob embraces and warms her, he and Edward have a cloying cringe fest in which Edward admits that if Jacob were not a werewolf, he would probably like him, and then Jacob admits that if Edward were not a vampire — well, no, no, he couldn’t. Come on, big guy. The two of you are making eye contact. Edward’s been a confirmed bachelor for 109 years. Get in the brokeback spirit.

Yusei: You can be my wingman any day, Yugi.

Yami: No, Yusei. You can be mine.

sultry sax plays, they eyesex

Yusei: No homo, right?

Yami: ALL OF THE HOMO!

—Yu-Gi-Oh the Abridged Movie: Bonds Beyond Time

Theo in the original film is hinted that she might - might - be a lesbian or bisexual. And the reason it's best they don't come out and say it is because it adds to the tension between her and Elanor. See, half of the movie they're the only ones in a room together, and when the only person you can cuddle up with may or may not have the hots for you, it makes the scene a little bit more uncertain and therefore uncomfortable...it wasn't over the top, it was played pretty subtle.

—The Nostalgia Critic, commenting on the Les Yay in the original The Haunting

Uh, Cas - not for nothing but, last person who looked at me like that? I got laid.

—Dean, Supernatural

I'd say there was a subtle subtext here that Sam is deeply in love with Frodo, but it's more like skywriting with brass band accompaniment.

—The Agony Booth, recap of The Lord of the Rings