Has Two Thumbs And
Let's say somebody is talking about something you have no interest in. Now, you could say, "yeah, Whatever", but that lacks a certain ... flair. Fortunately, there is a better alternative:
Step 1: Pronounce the phrase, "What has two thumbs and doesn't care?"
Step 2: Hold up both hands at chest level, fingers curled and thumbs out, with the thumbs pointing toward yourself.
Step 3: (optional) "This guy!"
Naturally, the expression may be easily modified to express other things.
Advertising
- A Travelocity commercial had the virtuous-yet-put-upon female worker forced into a plane trip with the boorish male co-worker, who at one point is seen doing the "this guy" move, though the entire joke isn't portrayed.
- Expedia had at least one commercial showing an imagine spot of a Jerkass using this routine.
- Gamestop advertised an upcoming game with the quote "Who has two thumbs and loves killing Greek gods?"
- A radio ad for Geico has a man tell how he saves money by sending mail via pidgeon. After admitting that his mail usually doesnt end up at its assigned destination he says "...but who has two thumbs and isn't buying stamps? This guy!"
Comic Books
- A Sid The Sexist strip in Viz from back in the 1990s had "What's got two thumbs, speaks French and likes bler jobs?" (The answer, of course, was Moi, and the speaker was injured by the recipient of this chat up line.)
Film
- In Year One: "Who has two thumbs and wants another hot oil rub?"
- In Insomnia: "Who has two thumbs and loves blowjobs?"
- In The Limey, Nicky Katt's character tells the "loves blowjobs" variety.
- In Maui's song "You're Welcome", from Disney's Moana:
What has two thumbs that pulled up the sky
When you were waddling yea high?
This guy!
Live Action TV
- Bob Kelso from Scrubs has employed this a number of times.
- Once used mockingly by Jim in The Office after being noticeably irritated by Todd Packer's use of this.
Jim: "Who has two thumbs and hates Todd Packer?"
- That '70s Show: In the first episode of season 2, "Garage Sale", Hyde bakes a batch of special brownies, prompting Kelso to say "You know what's got two thumbs and really likes brownies?" (points thumbs at himself) This guy!"
- 30 Rock: "Who has two thumbs, speaks limited French, and hasn't cried once today? This moi!"
- A Castle outtake involved Nathan Fillion ad-libbing the following:
Castle: "What has two thumbs and a date with a prostitute? This guy!"
- Variation on the June 16, 2010, episode of The Daily Show: "Who has four fingers and resigned in disgrace? This Guy.".
- Trina and then Andre in Victorious did this in the episode "The Birthweek Song".
- A Catch Phrase of Jackson's on Hannah Montana.
Newspaper Comics
- In the March 13th 2012 Dilbert strip, Dilbert reads about the possibilities of there being billions of versions of the earth in millions of universes and wonders "..if there's a version of me out there who loves his job.". In the next panel labeled Meanwhile on XPQ-75... a three armed woman approaches a three armed Dilbert.
3 Armed Woman: What has three thumbs and wants a shoulder massage?
3 Armed Dilbert: This guy!
Professional Wrestling
- Rob Van Dam implies this.
Stand Up Comedy
- One Stephen Lynch routine parodies the old days of vaudeville, with David Josefsberg.
David: Stephen...
Stephen: Yes David...
David: Who has two thumbs and likes blowjobs?
Stephen: I don't know David, who has two thumbs and likes blowjobs?
David: This guy!
Video Games
- Kid Icarus: Uprising has one.
Pit: Who has two thumbs and loves hot springs? EVERYONE WITH TWO THUMBS!
Web Comics
- In A Girl and Her Fed, Speedy tries this, but is foiled by not having thumbs. (This is unintentionally hilarious for a completely different reason: real Koalas actually have four thumbs.)
- In Tweep, Lily is full of awesome.
- In The Adventures of Dr. McNinja, The Abs Man attempts this but fails due to him omitting too much of the setup line.
"What has two thumbs and is like a tool shed?" "This guy."
"You're a tool shed. What does that have to do with the girl?"
"It is where all the hoes are at."
- This Cyanide & Happiness strip.
Web Original
- The Literal Video Version of "Billie Jean" has Who has two thumbs and likes BJ?/ Me!/ I like Billie Jean!/ (That's what I thought BJ means!).
- After announcing himself the winner of a contest he created, Josh Ramsay of Marianas Trench then declared, "Hey, what has two thumbs and just won the contest? This guy!"
Western Animation
- In Robot Chicken's parody of the dinner at Cloud City, guess who "has two thumbs and betrayed his friends?" That's right, Lando.