Evolution (film)/Funny
- "There's always time for lubricant!"
- "ITS IN MEEEEEE!!!"
- From the same scene:
Alison: Can we get you anything? Do you need anything?
Harry: Ice cream... I'd like an ice cream, please.
Alison: Yeah? What flavour?
Harry: It doesn't matter. It's for my ass.
Dr. Paulson: We might have to amputate. (grabs a surgical saw)
Harry: Whoa, Doc! Don't take the leg! Ira, don't let them take my leg.
Ira: Isn't there anything else you can do? He thinks he's an athlete.
Nurse Tate: Doctor, look!
Dr. Paulson: It's headed for his testicles!
(Beat)
Harry: Take it! Take it!! TAKE THE LEG!!
Ira: Cut him open, let's get this thing!
Harry: Cut me open?! There goes your Christmas gift, Judas!
- This scene, full stop. Somehow, the comic timing between Stifler, Dr. Lee and Agent Mulder melds into something unearthly yet full of lulz. The fact that Harry is almost completely and utterly deadpan throughout just sells it.
Harry: Wayne, I think we've established that "Ka-Kaw Ka-Kaw" and "Tukki Tukki" don't work.
Wayne: (sheepish) Right. Sorry.
(After a short while, he starts singing into the mic, to the utter disbelief of Ira and Harry)
Wayne: (singing) You are so beautiful, to meeee...
Ira: ...Step back, Harry, I'm gonna shoot him.
Harry: Uh-uh, stand down! I'm taking this one out myself.
- It works.
- Ira's "fruit basket" for General Woodman.
- Harry holding the bottle backwards during the commercial at the end.
- {After the dragon alien barfs up its eggsac}
Harry: Mazel tov, it's a boy!
- Harry getting sucked into the giant alien's ass.
Harry: IT'S HOR-R-R-RIBLE IN HERE!
- Not to mention when Ira finally pries him out, Harry shouts, "Don't you EVER tell anyone where I've been!"
Ira: If I was a giant nasty alien bird in a department store, where would I be?
Harry: Lingerie.
Ira: Not you, the bird.
Harry: ...Lingerie!
- Deke and Danny's hilariously bad science papers:
Ira: Last night as I was grading papers, I came across two gems both entitled "Cells are Bad" and both with just one paragraph which I unfortunately committed to memory: "Cells are bad. My uncle lives in a cell. It's ten foot by twelve and he has to read the same boring old magazine everyday. The end."
- Though he's seriously a jackass, this troper can't help but crack up when the General explains how to kill the alien.
General Woodman: With napalm. Lots and lots of napalm.