Casablanca/Funny

• "I'm shocked! Shocked that there's gambling going on in here." "Your winnings, sir." "Ah, thank you very much."
  • Louis has a bunch of these. When he's reminded there's a gun pointed at his heart: "That is my least vulnerable spot."
• This exchange:

Ugarte: You despise me, don't you?
Rick: If I gave you any thought I probably would.

• And this:

Rick: How'd you get in here? You're underage.
Young Woman: I came with Captain Rénault.
Rick: (rolls eyes) I should've known...
Young Woman: (primly) My husband is with me also.
Rick: Oh, he is? Well, Louis must be getting broad-minded.

• The Blind Idiot Translation of a couple of German refugees who have decided to only speak English, in preparation for moving to America.

Husband: "Liebchen-- er, sweetnessheart... what watch?"
Wife: (checks time) "Ten watch."
Husband: "Such much?"

• • And Karl's reaction: "...You will get along beautifully in America."