Boycott the Caf

Boycott The Caf is a humor website that has mainly earned its popularity from its parodies Degrassi the Next Generation. They actually like the show, but it's still worth noting when they think it'll be Ruined FOREVER. Think of it as Degrassi: The Abridged Series, only without the voice acting. Find it here.

As of the end of the season 10 they have decided to stop episode reviews, so they can continue working on reviews and jokes of other shows and movies. Their latest project is to put up a fake Facebook page for one member of every group of True Companions featured on the show.

Tropes used in Boycott the Caf include:

• Affectionate Parody: Well, sometimes.
• Arson, Murder, and Jaywalking: When predicting the tragedies that will unfold in season 5: By the season's end, Craig will kill Ellie in a bi-polar crazy binge, Toby will drive a car off a cliff, Hazel will become a suicide bomber, Marco will get full blown AIDS, and Emma will continue having to be Emma.
• Artistic License Geography: After the episode where Marco somehow accidentally ends up in the gay district, Boycott the Caf make a beautiful map of Canada from what they've gathered in the series.
  • The Philippines are in Latin America now.
  • They also mock how the producers continue to confuse Canada for America.
• Ascended Meme: "Well, I did boycott the caf because of it." No, Spinner. No, you did not.
• Author Filibuster: The original end of the review for "Mirror in the Bathroom" had a rather lengthy rant about why being obese is actually bad for your health, and why looking like Terri is not healthy. When the site changed addresses, the rant was cut and reduced to a simple, one-paragraph explanation about how being too fat is just as bad as being too skinny.
  • Sean in Season 6.
• But Now I Must Go: In season four, after Sean leaves the show, they change the ending of the episode to him simply getting sick of this world, jumping on a jet ski and riding a wave all the way into the sun in a blaze of glory.
• Butt Monkey: Mr.Simspson. Apparently Spike had him castrated, they do BDSM without a safe word, he has to ask Emma for permission to do stuff, and is at the bottom of the hierarchy in his own house which goes: Spike, Emma, whichever one of Emma's friends is staying at their house at the time, Baby Jack, and Snake. He is apparently forbidden to find women attractive on the grounds of that being sexist.
  • Liberty and Toby also get this.
    • Toby is eventually freed from this when he is basically dumped from the show.
• Canada, Eh?: Used for a lot of jokes, especially revolving around the lack of minorities and Toronto's status as the center of the universe.
• Character Blog: Well, they do tweet to the Degrassi cast a lot.
• Cluster F-Bomb: Upon discovering Liberty is pregnant: Holy MotherFuckingGodDamnMervGriffin Shit! Unbelievably gross.
• Degrassi the Next Generation and all associated tropes.
• Did You Just Punch Out Cthulhu?: They consider JT pulling off Spinner's pants to have been their Final Battle.

Suddenly out of the shadows darts JT. He runs straight at Spinner, "What does this mortal think he can do to me?" Spinner laughs heartily. If he only knew.

• Do Not Do This Cool Thing: And how!
• Don't Explain the Joke: From the review of Weddings, parties, anything.

Damn Marco, you'd think he'd have a stronger back, ha ha get it? Marco gets bents over and sodomized a lot.
Marco will show Tim ALL the ropes if you get my drift. (You most likely did not get my drift. I am implying that Marco will have anal sex with Tim.)

• Driven to Suicide: Ellie's pet Ferret killed itself, because it felt like it could not escape her like Sean did.
• Eagle Land: More "Americanized" than the show, although they do love to bring up what they know about Canada.
• Even the Guys Want Him: Billie and Johnny really seem to love Spinner, don't they?
  • And since apparently Johnny is a straight man and Billie is a lesbian (maybe), that just goes to show the raging studliness that is Spinner. Of course if Billie is just a gay man, then this trope is hardly surprising. See viewer gender confusion below.
• Even Evil Has Standards: Billie and Johnny are more than willing to make fun of the handicapped, the overweight, the black, the gay, and cheer for rapists, but they think Degrassi has gone too far when they show JT and Liberty making out. They also revile equally as much when it's revealled she and JT had sex.
• Fanfic: Billie and Johnny write their own dream episode of Degrassi, in which Quebec secedes from the rest of Canada and becomes its own country, and the Degrassi kids and faculty (who were on a field trip in Quebec at the time) get caught up in the crossfire as hostages. This forces Jimmy to reveal himself as being from the future in order to help resolve the crisis, Spinner leading a rescue mission into Quebec (which is depicted as having devolved into a police state), and a Canadian Civil War breaking out. Hilarity Ensues, naturally.
• Fan Haters: Billy and Johnny really hate Degrassi Boards
• Fiction 500: Jimmy's a millionaire from the future.
• Gag Penis: they made a CHART displaying the (assumed) sized of all of the men's penises. Needless to say Spinner is the champion.
• Gayborhood: They've constructed a rough idea of the layout of the town based on the proximity of Gay Town to The Dot.
• Girl-On-Girl Is Hot: Expect this in any Palex episode.
• Hypocritical Humor: See Even Evil Has Standards above.
• Karma Houdini: "The band is shooting a video about prison, where Peter would be in a just world."
  • Craig also gets this, it's the whole reason they support his father beating him.
• Mood Whiplash: One letter written to Darcy's actress begins as a glowing praise of how she is the best actress ever seen on Degrassi, and it's truly fitting that she is moving on to other shows and becoming a real, serious actor. By the end of the letter it is bitterly insulting her and claiming she will end up going no where in life.
• The Nicknamer: Besides the aforementioned Candy Bandits, Counselor Sauve becomes "Salve," Coach Armstrong is Couch Armstrong, Much Music becomes "VH-1 Canada," Dave and Wesley are "Mini-Connor" and "White Connor" and you can count the times they refer to Mr. Simpson as anything other than Snake on one hand.
• N-Word Privileges: Parodied in the "Connors" back story with Wesley White-Connor after he starts hanging out with Connor and Mini-Connor:

"White Connor assumed this got him in with the brothers, until a fateful trip to inner city Toronto in which he threw around the n-word resulted in a lengthy hospital stay."

• One-Hour Work Week: Judging by the rather spacious class schedules the students have in the show, the reviewers have concluded that all students schedules consist of "Media Immersion, English, two hours of lunch, gym, and then media immersion again, with anyone involved in any extra curricular activity whatsoever being allowed to skip out on all classes, along with anyone who feels like watching the activities from the bleachers, which is everyone.
• Race Lift: Manny's not Asian; she's a Spicy Latina.
• Refuge in Audacity: Probably why the Degrassi producers/writers like them.
• The Messiah: Rick was the second coming, and was brought to earth to stop Terri and her satanic devil worshiping ways, with her seances, tarot cards, and oujia boards, she was trying to get students top pledge their devotion to the dark lord. But just like Jesus, he was tortured and mocked, and eventually killed, by his peers. He will come again one day.
  • Spinner is also this. They mention that Terri's witchcraft can't hurt Spinner because he is the Son of God.
• Title Drop: Episode reviews typically title drop the episode. And it usually has nothing to do with what it originally referred to. Hilarity Ensues.
• What Could Have Been: The duo has come up with alot of good ideas for the show, to the point where Johnny comes up with two that are actually better than the episode he's recapping:
  • Spinner running the Dot with his long lost daughter and sassy waitress Holly J.
  • Jay tutoring the miscreants of Degrassi (Johnny, KC, an extra who was dubbed "Reese," and Wario) to become the new candy bandits, Yoda style.
  • Spinner and Sean teaming up to troll for pussy and cause random mischief.
  • Shep coming back every year, just like Sideshow Bob, to try and kill Connor.
  • The robots rebelling in the middle of Battlebots Canada.
• What Do You Mean It's Not Awesome?: Their recap of the episode where Emma gets her first period.
• X Meets Y: A comparison to X-Men.