Beowulf/Awesome

2007 film

• "I am ripper! Tearer! Slasher! Gouger! I am the teeth in the darkness! The talons in the night! Mine is strength! And lust! And power! I! AM! BEOWULF!
• "THE GODS WILL NOT ALLOW ME TO DIE! SO DO IT! KILL ME, FINN OF FRISIA! KILL ME!"
• SEA MONSTERS! And then, banging a mermaid.
• "TONIGHT! WILL BE DIFFERENT! TONIGHT HE WILL FIND GEATS WAITING FOR HIM, NOT FRIGHTENED SHEEP!"
• Wiglaf's repeatedly reluctant offer to enter the cave belongs here, too.
• Beowulf's greatest scene in the film is when he insists, on dying, that the truth be told. A hero for a very long time, he'd finally become a man.
• I'm sorry, how are we forgetting the scene were, at the conclusion of a massive Shadow of the Colossus-esque battle with a dragon twice the length of a 747 aircraft, he manages to slice open his throat while hanging by a chain (which burns his hand), cutting off his own arm to get his knife closer to heart that it just can't reach, and then after losing the knife and watching his two women about to get eaten, RIPS OUT THE DRAGON'S HEART WITH HIS BARE, THIRD-DEGREE BURNED HAND!! The badass scale officially broke at this point, especially since he's supposed to be somewhere between fifty to seventy years old.
• The fact that Neil Gaiman brilliantly changed the plot from the original myth, portraying it so that rather than killing Grendel's mother, Beowulf has sex with her, fathering the dragon, just as Hrothgar did before him, with Grendel as his son.