The Top Five Regrets of the Dying

The Top Five Regrets of the Dying - A Life Transformed by the Dearly Departing is a 2012 book by Bronnie Ware inspired by her time as a palliative carer.

Background

Ware first shared the insights in a 2009 blog post, "Regrets of the Dying".[1][2] The blog post was widely shared worldwide and by 2012 had been read by eight million people.[3]

In 2012 Ware expanded her blog post into a book memoir, The Top Five Regrets of the Dying, which was translated into 27 languages.[4][3]

Top five regrets of the dying

According to Bronnie Ware, the five most common regrets shared by people nearing death were:[5][6]

  1. "I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me."
  2. "I wish I hadn’t worked so hard."
  3. "I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings."
  4. "I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends."
  5. "I wish that I had let myself be happier."

A 2018 study reached similar conclusions, finding that people were more likely to express "ideal-related regrets", such as failing to follow their dreams and live up to their full potential.[7][8]

gollark: I would, but they're quite expensive.
gollark: Sorry, transient network bees.
gollark: It's *technically possible* to make somewhat repairable phones, it's just... unfortunately not something the majority of users care about, so it's mostly confined to niche products like pinephones and fairphones.
gollark: Manufacturers tend to limit authorized technician stuff a lot and/or overcharge massively.
gollark: Okay? I'd like to be able to, and I'd like it to be possible without expensive specialized equipment.

References

  1. Ware, Bronnie. "Regrets of the Dying". Inspiration and Chai. Archived from the original on 10 March 2010. Retrieved 31 January 2019.
  2. "Bronnie Ware: Beyond the 5 Regrets of the Dying". Good Life Project. Retrieved 31 January 2019.
  3. Khaleeli, Homa (16 November 2014). "Writing Top Five Regrets of the Dying has brought me to tears". The Guardian. Retrieved 31 January 2019.
  4. Moulder, Anna (10 October 2012). "A beautiful time for Bronnie". ABC New England North West NSW. Australian Broadcasting Corporation. Retrieved 31 January 2019.
  5. Steiner, Susie (1 February 2012). "Top five regrets of the dying". The Guardian. Retrieved 31 January 2019.
  6. Ware, Bronnie (7 January 2018). "Regrets of the Dying". Bronnie Ware. Retrieved 31 January 2019.
  7. Davidai, Shai; Gilovich, Thomas (April 2018). "The ideal road not taken: The self-discrepancies involved in people's most enduring regrets" (PDF). Emotion. 18 (3): 439–452. doi:10.1037/emo0000326. Retrieved 31 January 2019. In her book The Top Five Regrets of the Dying, Bonnie [sic] Ware, a palliative nurse, compiled the regrets most often expressed by patients nearing the ends of their lives (Ware, 2013). Although anecdotal, her observations are in line with our hypothesis. The most commonly cited regret mentioned by Ware’s patients was, "I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me."
  8. Pawlowski, Agnes (8 June 2018). "The most haunting regrets aren't about the things we've done, research finds". TODAY.com. NBC Universal. Retrieved 31 January 2019.
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