List of V.I.P. episodes
V.I.P. is an American action/comedy-drama series, which ran from 1998 to 2002 in syndication. Below is a list of all episodes.
Series overview
| Season | Episodes | Originally aired | |||
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| First aired | Last aired | ||||
| 1 | 22 | September 26, 1998 | May 22, 1999 | ||
| 2 | 22 | September 25, 1999 | May 20, 2000 | ||
| 3 | 22 | October 7, 2000 | May 19, 2001 | ||
| 4 | 22 | September 22, 2001 | May 18, 2002 | ||
Episodes
Season 1 (1998–99)
| No. overall | No. in season | Title | Directed by | Written by | Original air date | |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 1 | 1 | "Beats Working at a Hot Dog Stand" | J. F. Lawton | J. F. Lawton | September 26, 1998 | |
| Vallery Irons, a woman who accidentally saves a celebrity, is then hired to be a real-life bodyguard with an agency that solves cases. | ||||||
| 2 | 2 | "What to Do With Vallery When You're Dead" | Patrick Norris | Charles Holland | October 3, 1998 | |
| The VIP team tries to interest media tycoon Viktor Balek to become their client. However measly Internet documentary-maker Arnie Feign begs for their services pro bono, claiming Balek wants him killed by Thursday, when he'll have exposed him, which the professionals reject as paranoia. After Arnie's car is blown up, Val makes them agree: he can repay their services in kind, as Internet advertisement. | ||||||
| 3 | 3 | "Bloody Val-entine" | Sidney J. Furie | Teleplay by: Steven Kriozere Story by: J. F. Lawton & Steven Kriozere | October 10, 1998 | |
| VIP is hired by Ian Ziering as protection against stalking paparazzo Kip Lashane. Kay insists to 'take the lead' to spend time with her Beverly Hills 90210 idol, but that turns out to be a masked assassin. It's Tasha's ex, Peter 'the Owl', a former-KGB killer hired by mobster Scornabacho to eliminate Lashane. | ||||||
| 4 | 4 | "One Wedding and Val's Funeral" | J. F. Lawton | Morgan Gendel & Ron Zimmerman | October 17, 1998 | |
| Tasha expected King Solton of Ardenia to hire them out of gratitude for once helping to save his life, but it's Val's Hollywood fame which gets VIP hired. However Val's primary assignment is to act as royal matchmaker for Soltan's heir, Prince Jordan, a good sport who wants to modernize. Val keeps presenting him to commoners, even her waitress friend Maxine, but he picks slick Alex. VIP must ward off attacks from violent anti-monarchists, notably religious sect fanatics. Kay has romantic delusions about the prince. The court has its own hidden agenda, but there are even worse secrets. | ||||||
| 5 | 5 | "Scents and Sensibility" | Adam Nimoy | Morgan Gendel, Gabrielle Stanton & Harry Werksman | October 24, 1998 | |
| Cosmetics and perfume firm Bioglam hires VIP to protect it against industrial espionage. A sample of the revolutionary pheromone product Kizmet has just been stolen during a break-in. Top priority however is the inventor, lab genius Ken Miller. He secretly tests it illegally, and is hence irresistible to most females. However his former lab protégé, Dr. Tina Stokes, sells the formula to arms dealer Wilgur, because of a side-effect: after repeated use it causes extreme aggression. Steve Austin guest star. | ||||||
| 6 | 6 | "Diamonds are a Val's Best Friend" | Farhad Mann | Teleplay by: Rick Suvalle Story by: Morgan Gendel & Rick Suvalle | October 31, 1998 | |
| Cosmetics and perfume firm Bioglam hires VIP to protect it against industrial espionage. A sample of the revolutionary pheromone product Kizmet has just been stolen during a break-in. Top priority however is the inventor, lab genius Ken Miller. He secretly tests it illegally, and is hence irresistible to most females. However his former lab protégé, Dr. Tina Stokes, sells the formula to arms-dealer Wilgur, because of a side-effect: after repeated use it causes extreme aggression. | ||||||
| 7 | 7 | "Deconstructing Peri" | Chuck Bowman | Hannah Shearer | November 7, 1998 | |
| Hollywood director Gil Rosen hires V.I.P. to protect his prima donna Star Fox SciFi star, Peri Woodman, who is the target of sabotage. The first suspect is a stalking fan, but her fraternity party-animal boyfriend Ty Spencer may have been ignored too much. Or his dad, senator Barton Spencer, with presidential ambitions, is the most likely to feel threatened by her intended 'memoirs'. Val keeps meeting Barton's shady security chief, Mr. Banks. | ||||||
| 8 | 8 | "Val Got Game" | Greg Yaitanes | Steven Kriozere | November 14, 1998 | |
| Idealistic basketball agent Phil Sherman (C. Thomas Howell) hires VIP to protect his client, Kirby, who is too dumb to distinguish between good- and ill-willed people. Ruthless rival Kent Breakstone will stop at nothing to eliminate Kirby as competition for his boy, suave Jimmie. Kay goes undercover to keep a close eye on Kirby, but the naive pair falls in love. | ||||||
| 9 | 9 | "Vallery of the Dolls" | James A. Contner | Teleplay by: Ethlie A. Vare Story by: Ron Zimmerman, Gabrielle Stanton & Harry Werksman | November 21, 1998 | |
| Rapper Coolio hires VIP, due to being threatened by a stalker with a bomb on her chest. Glamour magazine boss Gower Jantzen (RT) hires VIP to find his missing centerfold girls and protect the remaining millennium competition contenders. An Asian gang keeps kidnapping girls. | ||||||
| 10 | 10 | "Midnight in the Garden of Ronnie Beeman" | Barry Primus | Teleplay by: Eric Estrin Story by: Morgan Gendel & Eric Estrin | January 16, 1999 | |
| To Tasha's horror, popular as well as grotesque talk-show host Ronnie Beeman, a Val fan, hires VIP as 'classy' studio goons, and as his personal body-guard after a failed on-air bomb attack by extremists prepared to use suicide pills. A hawk a talon tattoo actually identifies them as a secret super-commando team of five, who strike again. When Val stands-in as a guest presenter, her soft style taps into ruthless studio politics. | ||||||
| 11 | 11 | "Good Val Hunting" | Robert Radler | Gabrielle Stanton & Harry Werksman | January 23, 1999 | |
| Multi-billionaire Eric Collier, who made his fortune in arms, hires VIP to protect him while practicing extreme sports. Once the team is under contract, they see him on TV offering $10,000,000 to whoever kills him within 48 hours. After they ward off a few attempts on his life and join him in a fortress complex, a rough surprise follows. (Jerry Springer guest stars) | ||||||
| 12 | 12 | "Escape from Val-catraz" | Deran Sarafian | Eric Estrin | January 30, 1999 | |
| Convicted bank-robber Harry Murdock's ex, Cindy, hires VIP for their daughter Cynthia's wedding with Ted. Just then Harry makes a deal to reveal where he stashed away $17,000,000 he stole from corrupt cops, who stole it from Nikki's family, the Franco mobsters. He demands VIP protection in vain. His transport is attacked by his ex-partner, Rene Batiste, but Val and Nikki pick him up and go in hiding, while the FBI searches for all three. But so are Rene Batiste and his present partner, Garvick. Harry is determined to attend the wedding, and an extra. | ||||||
| 13 | 13 | "The Last Temptation of Val" | Patrick Norris | Steven Kriozere | February 6, 1999 | |
| Martial-arts star Johnny Loh left Hong Kong due to being innocently blamed for the death of his friend, a stuntman. While they counter a bank robbery, Val discovers he lives in LA as businessman Jay Chesler's bodyguard, Fong. He has to kidnap Nikki to get at his computer, but it is for a noble reason: it contains the evidence he gathered against the Tong (Chinese mob). But their boss, Han, is on his trail and is very determined to eliminate the threat. Alfonso Ribeiro guest star. | ||||||
| 14 | 14 | "Val Under Siege with a Vengeance" | Scott Paulin | Teleplay by: Milos Bachman Story by: Ron Zimmerman, Gabrielle Stanton & Harry Werksman | February 13, 1999 | |
| Helping the limber Brewster-twin models is a piece of cake. Guarding cryptography tycoon Simon Wirth's wife Jessica's annual fund-raiser fashion show seems even easier. But GDR-nostalgic Heinrich Anser's gang drugs and impersonates the band, Moscow Knights. They take hostages to use the US treasury codes for destabilizing the capitalist financial system. Serially adulterous Simon needs firm prodding to help escapees Val and Kay. | ||||||
| 15 | 15 | "Val on the Run" | Farhad Mann | Rick Suvalle | February 20, 1999 | |
| Val's production friend Steve Wizner, a rising Holywood studio executive, calls her just in time for VIP to rescue him from thugs sent by bootleg video bosses he will expose in court. He chooses VIP over FBI protection, but is shot in the pool with her by Helga, his Swedish topless 'housekeeper'. VIP suspects FBI witness protection Agent Lambert is the dirty link, but he's not the only one playing a deceptive game. | ||||||
| 16 | 16 | "ThunderVal" | Patrick Norris | Morgan Gendel | February 27, 1999 | |
| NSA agent Darman enlists high-IQ sociopath prisoner Dr. Stokes to trick the buyer on St.Kitts Thunder. That contact poison was just busted by the FBI from Russian rogue scientist Gregor, who died in the FBI bust. She accepts to play along if protected by VIP. So as a cover, they accept to do a sexy magazine's bikini calendar photo-shoot on a Caribbean cruise with professional photographer Boka Helmstadt. A nightly attack indicates there must be a mole. (Erik Estrada guest stars) | ||||||
| 17 | 17 | "The Quiet Brawler" | J. F. Lawton | J. F. Lawton | March 6, 1999 | |
| Val enjoys a champagne dinner with Baywatch beefcake David Chokachi, which is uneventful except for a ninja attack. Also, with his Mike Brawler action movie-franchise in a slump, studly star David Hart starts a new health products line and buys the gym where he trained as a kid, in a crime-ridden neighborhood. Fan Val signs-up all of VIP as members. Local gangster boss Colecord enlists Hart's vindictive, ever-beaten movie villain Rex Revo who is, in reality twice, his muscle-mass, because Hart tries to stop local 'clients' from buying the steroids his goons push. Rex goes out of control in order to force Hart into a real, no-gloves-nor-rules street-fight duel. Anderson's Baywatch co-star David Charvet guest stars. | ||||||
| 18 | 18 | "K-Val" | Bruce Seth Green | Morgan Gendel & Tom Abraham | March 12, 1999 | |
| Someone anonymously calls and e-mails that radio talk-show doc Lonnie Hippelman will also pay for her show 'hurting too many people'. Her gentle husband Roy, a space engineer, hires VIP to protect them and adolescent son Jeremy. The culprit proves a scarily able bomber and an elusive master-planner. There's no shortage of suspects. | ||||||
| 19 | 19 | "Mudslide Val" | Sidney J. Furie | Tom Chehak | May 1, 1999 | |
| Plastic surgeon Richard D. Gold calls VIP to protect him and 'someone else'. Before they arrive, he's been killed by a lethal injection that was staged as a cardiac arrest. The team sassily enjoys checking on a lead to Louis Westin's luxury spa, Red Oak. There they find Hollywood producer Frank Zeit in hiding. Yet a more likely target is Louis, in his former identity as secret agent Bob Porter. He suspects drug lord Adam Banta, who actually checks-in with his murderous accomplice as the Johnsons. | ||||||
| 20 | 20 | "Raging Val" | R. W. Ginty | Teleplay by: Paul Chitlik Story by: Morgan Gendel & Paul Chitlik | May 8, 1999 | |
| The team tries to help Rigo Fernandez, Quick's last boxing opponent, who is in trouble with his manager, Carlos Montecinas, who is working for the Russian mob. VIP first must work out the fighters' pasts, then deal with present secrets and treason. As a cover, Val also tries her hand at training, as the boxing show must go on. Gilbert Gottfried guest stars | ||||||
| 21 | 21 | "Three Days to a Kill" | Sidney J. Furie | Eric Estrin | May 15, 1999 | |
| Kay is excited when her college lover, hunky architect Stu Solomon, calls for a dinner. She insists to offer him free protection upon learning he was threatened by tycoon Clay. VIP however soon fins Stu is far from innocent; in fact he can resist neither a scam nor a flirt. Morgan Fairchild guest stars | ||||||
| 22 | 22 | "Val the Hard Way" | Larry Rapaport | Teleplay by: Morgan Gendel & Steven Kriozere Story by: J. F. Lawton & Morgan Gendel | May 22, 1999 | |
| Las Vegas crime lord "The Prophet" recruits the 'DD Girls', assorted LA vamp-criminals, for a secret job in Vegas. LAPD detective Grispy has arrested them and hires VIP to impersonate them, being physical look-a-likes but with different specialties. They must keep it up long enough to find The Prophet's mysterious boss. The perks are tempting enough to postpone Val's security anniversary, but the job proves equally dangerous, especially when the real DD Girls escape. Sherman Hemsley, Penn & Teller, Eva Mendes and Ice-T guest stars. | ||||||
Season 2 (1999–2000)
| No. overall | No. in season | Title | Directed by | Written by | Original air date | |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 23 | 1 | "Return of the Owl" | Patrick Norris | Rick Suvalle | September 25, 1999 | |
| VIP is recruited to guard Thorvald Knudsen, the Norwegian delegation leader in an ongoing territorial waters conflict with equally pacific neighbor Sweden. Tasha discovers the place is swarming with people from her past, including the Owl and other exes, and she's programmed hypnotically with a killer-command. It all ties in somehow to the Russian mob, with a surprising accomplice. Erik Estrada, Donny Osmond, and Marie Osmond guest stars. | ||||||
| 24 | 2 | "Big Top Val" | Patrick Norris | Leslie Ray | October 2, 1999 | |
| Billionaire Ronald Zane hires VIP to baby-sit his daughter Amelia, normally a quiet nerd. However she insists to have some sassy fun. That includes a visit to Cirque de Lumière. There Nicki recognizes the Esperanza trapeze brothers as Tommy Wipp and Tino Scarlatti, who staged a car explosion years ago to convince the mob and the FBI that they're dead. Those mob family members use the circus as a cover for an illegal arms trade. The team goes undercover while Nicki questions Don Franco who killed who. Meanwhile the brat escapes. David Groh guest stars. | ||||||
| 25 | 3 | "Ransom of Red Val" | Sidney J. Furie | Teleplay by: Jodie Lewis Story by: Ethlie Ann Vare | October 9, 1999 | |
| VIP is asked to serve as haughty rock diva Iris Leon's bodyguards by her manager-boyfriend and his deputy, on account of a stalker. They soon find they set that up behind her back, for the 'free' publicity. But real danger soon turns up. Val replaces Iris's stand-in, and ends up kidnapped in her place. | ||||||
| 26 | 4 | "Dr. StrangeVal" | Farhad Mann | Tom Abraham | October 16, 1999 | |
| Ukrainian general Koyla Trofimov and his whoring assistant steal their country's nuclear launch codes in the presidential aid's case. They come to LA to sell it. But it gets mixed up with Val's silly friend Maxine's 'invention', a 'maxi case' combining beauty and office functions, which they hope to sell for a fortune to luggage king Slotkin. The FBI is after the nuclear buyer. | ||||||
| 27 | 5 | "Quick and the Dead" | Larry Rapaport | Eric Estrin | October 23, 1999 | |
| An Italian B-movie star first hires V.I.P. as security for her directing debut, then her former driver Johnny Loh. Her golden family heirloom talisman becomes the target of a ruthless gang. Meanwhile Quick is the easy victim of a gang of identity thieves who get him arrested for stunts they pull, again and again. Verne Troyer guest stars | ||||||
| 28 | 6 | "Valma and Louise" | Greg Yaitanes | Teleplay by: Steven Kriozere Story by: Steven Kriozere & David Aaron Freed | October 30, 1999 | |
| TV talk show host Jay Lenno recruits V.I.P. to guard his precious collector's sports car Priscilla. Val naively insists to give a scared girl and her baby a ride and free protection. Tasha was right to object: it's Frank Newsom's bank robber gang member Sharon, who is being chased by ruthless bounty hunters, with the 'baby' a doll to hide the looted bonds in. And the gang isn't laying back either. Jay Leno and Tommy Lee guest stars. | ||||||
| 29 | 7 | "Stop or Val's Mom Will Shoot" | Adam Nimoy | Morgan Gendel & Ron Zimmerman | November 6, 1999 | |
| Nervous about a visit form her ma Carol Irons, Val takes a risk to overpower car-hijacker Marco Bielak. He's arrested but soon released, and hell-bent on revenge after ma arrives, who gets a crush on Johnny but believed Val's friends run a courier service. Meanwhile sinister businessman Roger Dintsman hires crooks to get hot software from SXC, the firm of Carol's employer Zupo. It turns out both cases link tightly. But Val also gets a unique change to learn about her pa she presumed dead. Loni Anderson guest star. | ||||||
| 30 | 8 | "Val Goes to Town" | Chuck Bowman | J. F. Lawton | November 13, 1999 | |
| Val's client is confused with David Duchonvy, so they're both kidnapped by mistake, but easily freed. Val obliges when the city orders VIP suspended and all staff disarmed during a ruthless investigation instigated by hostile LA councilor Doris Blasker for questionable methods and damages during successful operations. Val and the team face trial proceedings. Just then, the Prophet and his gang pull off their most daring plan: a fake terrorist apocalyptic blackmail. Ice T guest stars. | ||||||
| 31 | 9 | "Mao Better Blues" | Farhad Mann | Ralph Phillips | November 20, 1999 | |
| While shopping in LA China Town, Val and Johhny are handed by a fleeing Chinese woman a box and told to guard it. Johnny cares for the box of deity Kai-tong, the key to freedom and a treasure, but it can only be opened by someone pure of heart. Now they become the target of triad baron Victor Chang and Peking officials, who want to steal the fortune as well as arresting democracy activists. Kimberly "Lil' Kim" Jones guest star. | ||||||
| 32 | 10 | "Why Too Kay?" | Corey Michael Eubanks | Teleplay by: Rick Suvalle Story by: Morgan Gendel & Rick Suvalle | November 27, 1999 | |
| Jeff hires VIP to investigate why his adolescent son Jason Roberts has not contacted his parental home in months from a live-in school for the super-gifted in the Neotek Ranch. In fact Jason is in a secret government research project, due to being hooked on a computer game, while being manipulated by Katherine 'Kitty' Johnson. Kay goes undercover and discovers she once was at Neotek. The others liberate/kidnap Jason, only to learn afterward Jeff isn't his real dad. Tasha's spy friend Ebrique knows the project's apocalyptic potential. | ||||||
| 33 | 11 | "Dangerous Beauty" | Chuck Bowman | Teleplay by: Madison Lobrac & Mitchell Binder Story by: Mitchell Binder | January 22, 2000 | |
| Painter Bobby Xero is being stalked by a mysterious woman. Agent Steven Holz knows of various secret admirers. Holz reports to tycoon-client Van Loder, who ordered specific colors, regardless of the artistic design. After his works are attacked in the gallery, the team guessing the auction there may be the key. | ||||||
| 34 | 12 | "Analyse Val" | Sidney J. Furie | Tom Abraham | January 29, 2000 | |
| Dr. Gilbert Kemper, the US Vice President's psychiatrist, is nearly kidnapped while he asks V.I.P.'s protection against the Squires of Liberty. They threatened him to expose the VP's dirty secrets as blackmail ammunition for a crucial crime fighting bill. The team takes Kemper to safety on abandoned military base Manitou island. There he analyzes the team dynamics, obviously based on the fake stories about Val's professional excellence. | ||||||
| 35 | 13 | "All You Need is Val" | Steve Cohen | Kathy Slevin | February 5, 2000 | |
| The VIP professionals are hell-bent on the body guards job for Cora DeFarge, the haughty CEO of often threatened multinational Cora DeFarge Industries. Johnny's martial arts land them the lucrative job. Val and Key insist however to keep doing ecologist freebies, so they split to honor a contract with PETA, especially a benefit starring ex-Beatle Paul McCartney. Both teams soon discover their clients are bitter enemies. And Cora is covering up dirty business. | ||||||
| 36 | 14 | "New Val'd Order" | Gary Yaitanes | Morgan Gendel | February 12, 2000 | |
| VIP is hired to protect a sun tan brand's Hawaiian beauty pageant contestants. By the time they discover that Beller and ex-NATO-major Greta Krantz are planning to kidnap them, the professionals have also been captured. The ruthless program plans to 'breed' ideal soldiers from men who survive fights to the death and women winning multitasking-contests. Only Kay and Johnny, who was about to be officially enrolled, are left to mount a rescue. | ||||||
| 37 | 15 | "Vallery's Secret" | J. F. Lawton | Tom Abraham | February 19, 2000 | |
| Fashion designer Cleo Robbins is nearly killed by a bomb in her sports-car, but gets saved because of an accidental visiting ex: Quick. The heavy bomb suggests it's about business secrets, so VIP investigates people like tycoon Griffin Pierce and Cleo's own deputy. Vamp Val is ideal for this undercover scene. Kai discovers Cleo's firm isn't squeaky clean either. | ||||||
| 38 | 16 | "Hard Val's Night" | Greg Yaitanes | Teleplay by: Kathy Slevin Story by: Kathy Slevin & Morgan Gendel | February 26, 2000 | |
| In Orange Country to look for a heavenly Acres timesharing flat, VIP bumps into Lit-lead singer AJay Popoff in his boxers, while being pursued by the souvenir hunters who took his pants, so the rock band hires them. AJ also assigns Val to recuperate his lucky charm, an Elvis type 'Cat Eye' belt buckle. They succeed at Stiles' souvenir shop, but get pursued for it by Thelonius Brock's goons, although X-rays prove it's paste, without the real precious jewels. This episode famously premiered the music video for Miserable which featured Val as a giantess who lets the members of Lit perform on her body before she devours them. | ||||||
| 39 | 17 | "Third Eye Blond" | Robert Radler | Teleplay by: Hannah Shearer Story by: Morgan Gendel & Hannah Shearer | April 1, 2000 | |
| Bartholomew, psychic to the Hollywood stars, stumbles across the just dumped corpse of long-missing business heiress Hilary von Ryan after a party in the Hollywood Hills. Her fatally clumsy kidnappers, hired by Sid Hadari, who wanted her shares, chase 'Bart'. He hires VIP, without telling them or the police, but uses the story for his TV show. Val dates hunky but broke race car-driver Cole Calloway. Kay hits on with initially resented bright computer specialist Ned. | ||||||
| 40 | 18 | "Val's on First" | Greg Yaitanes | Eric Estrin | April 8, 2000 | |
| Baseball talent Buck Rice (FR) hires VIP, to protect him against whoever wants him off the present team beneath his talent, having recovered from a two year-old car incident back injury. Buck makes lots of enemies among jealous players and by serially seducing. His conquests include Carmen, the mistress of film producer Gerry Goldring, who already hated Buck for messing up his betting. | ||||||
| 41 | 19 | "Val Point Blank" | Greg Yaitanes | Eric Estrin & Morgan Gendel | April 29, 2000 | |
| Crook Faust's pseudo-terrorist Shining Brigade hijacks the QE2, while Val's East Vancouver high-school is holding its 1990 class reunion there. Because the veterans are training with the Navy Seals, only Johnny came with Val and self-invited curious Maxine. | ||||||
| 42 | 20 | "Franco in Love" | Chuck Bowman | Rick Suvalle | May 6, 2000 | |
| Nicoletta's godfather Don Franco is tailed and shot but recovers well. He asks her, his elected mob family heir, to hold the fort so long, notably run the transport firm. As he suggested, the Francos are under attack from the late Tony Scarnavaco's cocky sons Tony Jr. and Mark. The VIP team discovers secret agendas and attempts a modern 'classy' style make-over. | ||||||
| 43 | 21 | "Lights, Camera, Val" | Peter DeLuise | Steven Kriozere & Morgan Gendel | May 13, 2000 | |
| Rod Bernstein hires VIP to help him and driver Alvin physically deliver his newest cosmic disaster action movie. Alas, party-animal Rod owes money and an unreleased movie. His direct and indirect creditors send goons to collect, but selling the film only adds Chick Mars to the Hollywood brawl. Val also enters the deals equation as an actress. Christopher "Kid" Reid guest star. | ||||||
| 44 | 22 | "Ride of the Valkyries" | Peter DeLuise | Morgan Gendel & Steven Kriozere | May 20, 2000 | |
| After 22 years in the hole, ruthless Kane is sprung from Paraguyan jail by Hall's team. Their target just left Hawaii for LA, where he saves Val and is identified as her long absconded dad, Jed(ediah) Irons. Tasha's CIA contact Dante finds out he was involved in the fatal operation Omega, over 20 years ago. He explains it was betrayed and got him disgraced. Then he's apprehended by Hall's team. | ||||||
Season 3 (2000–01)
| No. overall | No. in season | Title | Directed by | Written by | Original air date | |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 45 | 1 | "Survi-Val" | Patrick Norris | Leslie Ray | October 7, 2000 | |
| Val wants to participate in FTS network's Danger Island survival reality. After an unidentifiable monster kills a burly contestant during the pilot recording, FTS network executive Jeff Groom hires VIP to protect the other contestants. Val, Quick and Nicky go as undercover bodyguards, monitored by the rest of the team. The killer strikes again, repeatedly. Kay discovers a plausible top-secret explanation. Rob Van Dam guest star. | ||||||
| 46 | 2 | "Loh-Down Dirty Shame" | Savage Steve Holland | Steven Kriozere | October 14, 2000 | |
| Archaeologist Oliver King (Larry Poindexter) hires Val to promote and guard his museum's latest exposition. It features the newly acquired cursed mask of war lord Jin Doo. Its cult still reveres its mythological powers, but it must be fed live souls. Johnny however is preoccupied with a surprise visit from his Chinese martial arts mentor, Jade. But she has a dark agenda. | ||||||
| 47 | 3 | "For Val's Eyes Only" | Savage Steve Holland | Tom Abraham & Rick Suvalle | October 21, 2000 | |
| VIP is hired to protect philanderer Harris, a party's vice-chairman during its national convention in Beverly Hills. On their way they stumble on and scare-off Shane's goons, thus disturbing even crueler bank-robber Carl Merrick's latest job. His MO matches that of the gangsters who accidentally killed Nicky's father, cop Nickolas Franco, 10 years earlier while robbing the same bank. | ||||||
| 48 | 4 | "V.I.P., R.I.P." | Jim Charleston | Tom Abraham | October 28, 2000 | |
| Only explicitly uninvited Val follows and 'chaperones' Tasha when she gets a CIA 'code 9' (probable suicide mission) from her former boss Wick, to eliminate in Yosemite her former partner Sanders, the last of three undercover agents allegedly gone rogue. They thus stumble upon a New World Order militia. The rest of VIP investigates coffin- and graves-vandalizing graffiti, but finds those probably relate to gambling debts and insurance fraud. | ||||||
| 49 | 5 | "Throw Val from the Train" | Savage Steve Holland | Teleplay by: Morgan Gendel Story by: Morgan Gendel & Eric Estrin | November 4, 2000 | |
| A criminal who was supposed to be executed, arranges for his death to be faked and he gets plastic surgery. He boards a train for his next caper. But also on board is Valerie who saw him just before he was supposed to be executed. And when they run into each other Val senses something familiar about him. | ||||||
| 50 | 6 | "Run, Val, Run" | Nelson McCormick | Rick Suvalle | November 11, 2000 | |
| Software genius Andy Eagle (Maury Sterling) hires Val as personal protection, fearing for his safety after inventing a revolutionary universal Internet-based operating system. The rest of VIP is hired by cyber billionaire Michael 'spider' Ellins' giant company Spyder Dyne. In fact they're taken hostage to test or sabotage Eagle's invention, which could ruin Spyder Dyne. | ||||||
| 51 | 7 | "Magnificent Val" | J. F. Lawton | J. F. Lawton | November 18, 2000 | |
| Val wants to protect her favorite Little Tokyo's sushi chef, Fuji, against extortion by Desmond Kusari's Okamura yakuza clan. Fuji, an old samurai descendant, instead accepts a sword duel with Desmond, but his family enlists VIP, so it becomes a group fight. Fuji gets killed, but passes his sword to Val, who thus becomes his clan protector. Fearing her phony fighting reputation, the yakuza hires Japanese champion Hirata The Black, but also posts snipers. | ||||||
| 52 | 8 | "ExValibur" | Nelson McCormick | Rick Suvalle | November 25, 2000 | |
| Johnny discovers his friend Caitlin has joined crazy Tagg's motor bikers gang, the Knights of Chaos who hold jousts in the saddle. Her rich father Jared Kittridge hires VIP to protect or retrieve the brat. Johnny and Val join undercover, which proves dangerous even before discovering their identities inspires Tagg criminally. | ||||||
| 53 | 9 | "Get Vallery" | Tawnia McKiernan | Robert Bielak | January 13, 2001 | |
| VIP's improvisation impresses has-been actress Bobbi Canary, who came to study security guards for Stephen Cannell's new movie project Night of the bodyguard. VIP soon finds out she staged it to trick them into free 'acting' for a cheap movie. But studio boss Peter Stiles also hired real muscle for his own project. | ||||||
| 54 | 10 | "Bodyguards" | Scott Brazil | Norma Safford Vela & Steven Kriozere | January 20, 2001 | |
| At the Bodyguard Expo celebrity kidnapping/countering competition, VIP is to take on New York's market leader, Ty Bolander's Hamptons Security. But federal judge Kreiger has hired a goon to find and eliminate an undercover cop, which he extracts from Val's favorite barman, Relic. Both target lists get exchanged during a brawl in Foam, leading to mislead kidnapping. Ray Wise guest star. | ||||||
| 55 | 11 | "Val in Space" | Bruce Campbell | Leslie Ray | January 27, 2001 | |
| VIP is hired to protect playboy Dex Decker, who enjoys the perks of hero-hood after manning Porter Aerospace's rescue mission for six Russian Cosmonauts. He claims the men are violently demanding that he keep his mouth shut are Russians because he stole some high-tech gizmo 'souvenir' to impress chicks. But Tasha's sexy KGB source puts them on the trace of the goons' real boss- rising space technology tycoon Billy Porter himself. | ||||||
| 56 | 12 | "Val Squared" | Savage Steve Holland | Teleplay by: Steven Kriozere Story by: Morgan Gendel & Steven Kriozere | February 3, 2001 | |
| VIP is hired to protect Kai's dream man, hunky ecologist Dr. Bonzai, who invented a bacteria which eats oil spills. Val however prefers to accept a free spa visit with Maxine. But escaped villain Dr. Tina Stokes and her accomplice Angel recruit an ex-cop Val-lookalike and train her to take Val's place and infiltrate VIP after a make-over. The target is Diablo, a terrible concoction suitable for terrorist purposes, which Banzai's lab reproduced. | ||||||
| 57 | 13 | "Val on Fire" | Bruce Campbell | Steven Kriozere & Mark Yoshimoto Nemcoff | February 10, 2001 | |
| VIP attends an LA 'cage wrestling' show of the Laser Lordz, who are former Army special operations mates of Quick, starring Photon and B.J. When someone attacks them, they hire VIP, who participate as a cover. The wrestlers hesitate but ultimately admit it must be their sadistic former drill sergeant Kobler, who became a major and was left alone during their last operation. | ||||||
| 58 | 14 | "A.I. Highrise" | Scott Brazil | Steven Kriozere | February 17, 2001 | |
| Just after Trans Global International Finance's CEO W. Knight hires VIP to test his ICT genius Dave's new security system KOP in his otherwise empty LA skyscraper, which he wants to put on the rent market, his team is attacked by Nero's men, who inject truth serum, mixed with lethal poison. As Knight explicitly requested Val, she goes with Kay, Quick and Nicky, but also picks up hunky gentleman Klozak, who proves a true white knight. And their budding romantic feelings are the confusing key to distracting KOP's experimental AI. Meanwhile Johhny and Loh get to protect football players Jeremy and Tyrone at a party. They become the target of stealing smugglers. | ||||||
| 59 | 15 | "Val in Carnation" | Jack Clements | Leslie Ray | February 24, 2001 | |
| At hippie crowd celebrity Zack Henley's party, Maxime starts getting 'memories from a former life' and accuses him of some murder, years ago. Both parties get death threats and hire VIP for protection. After a séance, evidence is found incriminating Zach in the place where his latest mini series is being shot, enough for LAPD detective Grispy to arrest him. Then Maxine changes her 'Déja Voodo' story. | ||||||
| 60 | 16 | "Goodfidellas" | Savage Steve Holland | Paul Ruggiero | April 7, 2001 | |
| Val hoped to get a job and part opportunities with Jennifer Lopez by providing security at Relic's bar Foam while her people scout for a new LA concert venue. But they discover international Latin American terrorist hit man Manuel Garza was there, sniping businessman Luis Montez, who was recruiting baseball talents Andrian Gonzales and Mark Quinn for his 'dram camp', so Luis becomes VIP's client. He bonds with fellow macho scars-collector Quick, but there arise theories about his true identity. | ||||||
| 61 | 17 | "Amazon Val" | Peter DeLuise | Tom Abraham | April 14, 2001 | |
| Dr. Bob Landesberg (Robert Romanus) has hired VIP to extract and protect Kyle Stamper, who lived for 23 years in the Amazon since boyhood when his parents still lived. His blood contains a rare antigen, which may cure meningitis. They want to donate it to humanity, but the pharmaceutical competition wants that $5 billion market, and hires ruthless hit-man Dolman to get Kyle in LA. Dr. Bob makes some dire discoveries, but a hidden agenda proves even more dangerous. | ||||||
| 62 | 18 | "Val Under Covers" | Savage Steve Holland | Norma Safford Vela & Rick Suvalle | April 21, 2001 | |
| VIP discretely assures the protection of corporate bell ringer Tony Vartebedian, a chemist who is secretly scheduled to expose on Neal Berens's TV show 365 his employer GloMar Petroleum for selling gas they knew to cause cancer risks. Two of his colleagues died from suspicious 'accidents'. So VIP poses as a family renting the house across Tony's suburban home. Val quickly bonds with hunky ecologist neighbor Blake Thompson, but he's not who he says. Tony's boss indeed hired Paco to kill all potential squealers, and a back-up. | ||||||
| 63 | 19 | "Aqua Valva" | Nelson McCormick | Morgan Gendel | April 28, 2001 | |
| Jimmy Malibu, mob uncle Vittorio Franco's speedboat pilot in the Donzi race, is eliminated by a frogman lurking in the water. Nikki takes his place to score and get the fiends, with VIP watching their back. Enigmatic billionaire Lagos (an acronym) courts Val to visit his giant yacht, actually also the HQ of his international illegal information sales business. The NSA recruits Val to investigate his presumed auctioning of a Chinese spy satellite. | ||||||
| 64 | 20 | "Molar Ice Cap" | Tawnia McKiernan | Teleplay by: Tom Abraham Story by: Norma Safford Vela & Tom Abraham | May 5, 2001 | |
| A suspicious birthday card pits Tasha on the trail of her ex, dentist Ted McClellan (David Starzyk), who is then seen being attacked by fiends. They're after dental records for a scam planned by Bolivian drug cartel US market baron Simon Pike. So VIP protects Ted, and discovers Tasha's twice ex, the Owl, is also involved. | ||||||
| 65 | 21 | "It's Val's Wonderful Life" | Patrick Norris | Teleplay by: Norma Safford Vela Story by: Morgan Gendel | May 12, 2001 | |
| While making an at first sight inoffensive exchange, Val is left on a yacht with a bomb, caught by her stiletto. She's presumed dead, so VIP loses its front star, hence within a month, clients and staff starts to desert to other jobs. Meanwhile Val has amnesia, and gets stranded on a Mexican beach, where simple fishermen take her in. However, revenge is in the making. | ||||||
| 66 | 22 | "Val's Big Bang" | Savage Steve Holland | Morgan Gendel & Steven Kriozere | May 19, 2001 | |
| During Argentina's junta rule in 1951, two Neo-Nazis hide the prototype of a device meant to revive the Third Reich in a booby-trapped cave of Patagonia's extinct Diaquita tribe's lost city Camarena. They accidentally trigger it and die in the explosion. Decades later, an archaeological team digging there hires Nikki as an explosives expert, with VIP to protect the treasures. Ukrainian general Koyla Trofimov is on the trail of the 'hyper-dimensional' device. Tasha and Quick stay home to install Kay's state of the art security system for composer "Weird Al" Yankovic, but Val accidentally took the control device with her. | ||||||
Season 4 (2001–02)
| No. overall | No. in season | Title | Directed by | Written by | Original air date | |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 67 | 1 | "21 Val Street" | Savage Steve Holland | Steve Kriozere | September 22, 2001 | |
| Val's nosiness ruins Relic's undercover job at an LA college campus as student Todd. The only way to save his investigation into mob king Hans Lamal through his campus drug pusher, Kenny Farmer, is for all VIP to join him in various undercover capacities after catching the mob killer Lamal sent after him which is, in Quick's case, as that hit-man. However Hans's secret identity covers another secret. | ||||||
| 68 | 2 | "Chasing Anna" | J. F. Lawton | Tom Abraham | September 29, 2001 | |
| Johnny and Quick become rivals for a dating favor from client Anna Petrov (Ashley Jones), whose parents were killed in a suspicious car crash. It turns out general Volykov, head of the secret police of Kasbayan, is heading a team of killers to eliminate her, as she is the princess/heiress and therefore the last threat to the ruthless regime he defected to when the king was overthrown. | ||||||
| 69 | 3 | "Holy Val" | Greg Yaitanes | Teleplay by: Eric Estrin Story by: Morgan Gendel & Leslie Ray | October 6, 2001 | |
| VIP is hired by executive secretary Kamin and elder Rygel to protect their 'cosmic' Centaurian cult's treasured 'sacred' meteorite. They successfully ward off an attempt to steal it by internationally wanted master thief Roberto 'Bobby' Perez, who next kidnaps Val, but soon discover the story isn't that simple. | ||||||
| 70 | 4 | "Millennium Man" | Savage Steve Holland | Teleplay by: Steven Kriozere Story by: Steven Kriozere & Leslie Ray | October 13, 2001 | |
| VIP loses Rod Fallon and other Hollywood clients after being publicly outclassed by competitor Adam Fowler's goons. However they discover he drugs them with a pharmaceutical which the company, Dalco, based on Chang Kai Cheq's Purple Legion's bo chi potion but didn't commercialize because of the side-effects. One of them, Trey, turns out to be a former USMC buddy of Nicky, and may already have suffered brain damage. | ||||||
| 71 | 5 | "South By Southwest" | Greg Yaitanes | Morgan Gendel & Steven Kriozere | October 20, 2001 | |
| Canadian wrestler Tyler 'Sabretooth' Mane hires VIP to prevent serious harm when loony machos provoke him, hoping to get beaten up by the master. Real danger lurks because FBI agent Darman's team invented a decoy super-agent to smoke out Fallon's Red Coyote terrorist movement, but chance made it look like Tyler is him. He accepts to play along, now closely protected by VIP himself. In the process, he rediscovers himself and reevaluates the sense of his career choices. | ||||||
| 72 | 6 | "Valzheimer's" | Nelson McCormick | Tom Abraham | October 27, 2001 | |
| Dean McGee (Victor Webster) desperately seeks VIP's help, suffering from amnesia after a knock to the head. He's the target of Harman industry's hit-men to prevent him revealing that the revolutionary Jaw Hawk car, which Nikki is to test drive, is a failure. The test is part of the charitable events Val volunteered the team for in the contest to become mayor for a day. | ||||||
| 73 | 7 | "The Uncle From V.A.L." | Greg Yaitanes | Steven Kriozere | November 3, 2001 | |
| Val's clumsy, naive uncle Ned Irons (Mark Hamill), who never got beyond administrative work in the Mounties corps he longs to join, accidentally finds a parchment deed which grants an Inuit tribe a large tract in the Yukon. When he 'returns' it to the native crooks gang of Turoc and Ta'eena, they try to eliminate the only witness who can ruin their planned land deal with an oil multinational. Ned escapes to LA, where his favorite niece Val still believes he's a Mountie hero. The crooks follow, and so does Yukon RCMP station sergeant Roarke, who wants to arrest 'rogue deserter' Ned. | ||||||
| 74 | 8 | "Pen Pal Val" | Jack Clements | Leslie Ray | November 10, 2001 | |
| Damian Caine, Val's favorite Cyber author, is released on a technicality in a trial that would have meant jail for arson in the V Club, which killed popular owner Burt Wyler just after he fired Damian, using the MO of his first cyber crime story, Epsilon. VIP believes in his innocence and protects him after someone throws a Molotov cocktail at Damien, which could only have come from another Epsilon chapter. District Attorney Pete Overton, who has senatorial ambitions, is most eager to convict Caine for a new poison murder, which again could have come from Epsilon. | ||||||
| 75 | 9 | "Kayus Ex Machina" | Tawnie McKiernan | Teleplay by: Rick Suvalle Story by: Rick Suvalle & Lorianne Overton | November 17, 2001 | |
| CIA agent Andrew D Welles (Brian McNamara) decides on his own that a plan to eliminate a Latin American general-dictator, although never approved by Washington, is to be executed anyhow, even if that requires murdering a reluctant colleague. But its finance depends on a dot com front company, which just made major stock holder Kay a small fortune, which she invests mainly in converting her favorite muffin bakery into a cyber café. The secret plans are hidden in its personnel files, which Kay downloads unsuspectingly. The CIA notices that, and Welles wants to eliminate her, assuming her Internet posting meant for the cyber café is an auctioning of the secret plans. | ||||||
| 76 | 10 | "Crouching Tiger, Hidden Val" | Nelson McCormick | Rick Suvalle | November 24, 2001 | |
| Johhny is delighted that Hollywood director Jeremy Harmetz has cast him for a low-budget action movie as martial arts actor/stuntman. But the media exposure also discloses his survival to the Hong Kong "Tong" Triad's new LA boss, Morton Zhou, who assumed that he was killed. However Morton's daughter Catherine is kidnapped by mob competitor Jonas Smith, who is out to revenge his own son and steal her part of the Zhou fortune on the side. | ||||||
| 77 | 11 | "Saving Private Irons" | Nelson McCormick | Teleplay by: Leslie Ray & Rick Suvalle Story by: J. F. Lawton & Tom Abraham | January 19, 2002 | |
| Johnny gets dragged along in a no-dating-bet by Quick's clumsy infidelity. Just now Relic asks them to deliver a package to Hollywood producer Nina, whose office and next meeting place abound with scarcely dressed models and nudist part- guests. Nikki's former drill instructor asks the girls to go undercover in his marines' base because someone in the all-female platoon he's training has been stealing explosives and probably plans to kill top-secret prisoner 'Eagle', who turns out to be VIP-enemy Morales. | ||||||
| 78 | 12 | "Diagnosis Val" | Savage Steve Holland | Teleplay by: Leslie Ray Story by: Leslie Ray & Rick Suvalle | January 26, 2002 | |
| A hospital administrator asks VIP to protect Dr. Hank Jonas's (Clive Robertson) patients after two successfully treated botulism victims among them died mysteriously. Relic informs they were lured by fake, infected letters. The team goes undercover in various capacities to investigate the staff. Kay works out the victims were all jury members in the trial against Hank's fiendish brother for a prison murder. But he proves dangerously resourceful. Curtis Armstrong guest star. | ||||||
| 79 | 13 | "Val Cubed" | Savage Steve Holland | Steven Kriozere | February 2, 2002 | |
| V.I.P. is hired by the Environmental Protection Agency's Arthur Goodwin (Robert Gant) to help transport an experimental Red Coyote terrorist movement weapon to a marine base for destruction. But Val's evil double Joan Archer has escaped from the lunatic asylum, reassembles a gang and kidnaps Val, so she can take her place and abuse the device for revenge on V.I.P. Only Kay gets suspicious. | ||||||
| 80 | 14 | "The K-Files" | Jeff Cadiente | Leslie Ray | February 9, 2002 | |
| VIP is hired to protect the Rubicon trade summit after an anonymous terrorist threat letter. The FBI suspects include The Dark hand, which Johnny knows from Hong Kong, so they check on its LA member Miss Ying. Its de facto host and keynote speaker Charles Broder declares on TV to be among a recent wave of 'alien spaceship abductees'. Val insists Kay's bite/branding larks and memory loss 'prove' she is too. New incidents appear to follow both story lines, but what part does Broder's corporate deputy James Gilroy play? | ||||||
| 81 | 15 | "48½ Hours" | Jack Clements | Steven Kriozere & Tom Abraham | February 16, 2002 | |
| LAPD detective Grispy has another job for VIP, this time formally deputized. They must baby-sit jail-bird Lucy Stanton (Sarah Silverman), who will be remitted provided that she helps track her British ex-boss, international super-crook Nero, who escaped Interpol with a $20,000,000 diamond. Alas Lucy toys around to enjoy her freedom at the taxpayers' expense before actually pointing out Nero's right-hand Mase. Worse, Nero gets wind of the quest and starts killing off anyone connected however vaguely to him. | ||||||
| 82 | 16 | "Dude, Where's My Party?" | Greg Yaitanes | Morgan Gendel | February 23, 2002 | |
| FBI agent McDonough recruits Val for a patriotic service: testing a new facility's security under Dutch aliases, after 'shopping' for illegal arms and disguises. His secret agenda is to lure the real Red Coyote anarchists. Val picks as infiltration attempt sidekick Maxine, already scheduled as a partner to 'work' at an Eric Estrada party. They are indeed abducted, to be recruited as 'civilian experts', but for a surprising job. Erik Estrada guest stars. | ||||||
| 83 | 17 | "Kiss the Val" | Nelson McCormick | Tom Abraham | April 13, 2002 | |
| Pseudo-anarchist techno-master criminal Merrick (Don Swayze) is released from jail. VIP goes after him because Nikki hates her dad's killer unconditionally. However they soon discover he reassembled a gang and that his target is space technology. In fact he kidnapped a scientist's wife for the access codes to control the space shuttle. | ||||||
| 84 | 18 | "Miss Con-Jeanie-Ality" | Savage Steve Holland | Norma Safford Vela | April 20, 2002 | |
| After crew captain Luke McCain makes a fatal fall at the Miss All Organic rehearsals, VIP is hired to prevent another 'accident' from disturbing the beauty pageant. Next manager Frank Meecham also goes missing until he turns up in the morgue. The team soon goes undercover. Kay discovers both victims also had FBI agent aliases. Yasmine Bleeth and Joyce Brothers guest star. | ||||||
| 85 | 19 | "Sunshine Girls" | Savage Steve Holland | Rick Suvalle | April 27, 2002 | |
| VIP was hired to protect teacher Jane Percival until her testimony, which should put mob killer William Sikes (Jason Carter) away for good. His team captures Val and Tasha, but instead of classical torture and truth serum make them believe to have aged decades to make them betray the witness's hide-out. Sikes gets so impatient he even kills one of his own scientists. The rest of VIP tries the mob connection. | ||||||
| 86 | 20 | "True Val Story" | Savage Steve Holland | Rick Suvalle & Norma Safford Vela | May 4, 2002 | |
| Val is proud as a peacock and happy as a clam now that producer Betsy's TV series plans to do a profile of VIP focusing on her, while the professionals are jealous about having to serve as extras among crooks and menials singing her praise. That and security at a Ducati motorbike model launch show on the beach do not appear to be exciting enough, so 'reenactments' are planned where Val can star. However, recently paroled contract thief Ryan Hill wants to dig up his loot, which are bonds that are about to expire, on that very beach. | ||||||
| 87 | 21 | "Val Who Cried Wolf" | Michael Dorn | Teleplay by: Steven Kriozere Story by: Norma Safford Vela | May 11, 2002 | |
| Val's Hollywood idol, stand-up comedian Scott Thayler, famous for the Jimbo character movies, hires VIP after receiving death threats. Randall Waring is indeed hell-bent on extorting him, but Scott, who constantly jokes and lies about everything, keeps their common past hidden even from VIP. Kay meanwhile has various dealings with a fellow Jimbo super-fan. | ||||||
| 88 | 22 | "Valley Wonka" | Savage Steve Holland | Mark Hamill & Morgan Gendel | May 18, 2002 | |
| The heiress of Granny Groshen's (Dorothy Lyman) cookie business posthumously hired VIP for security at her funeral, reading of her will and its execution. She left half of the priceless recipe to son Bernard and daughter Rhonda each. She wants to keep the family business as it is, he to cash a German multinational's $700,000,0000 bid. 'Bernie' is being blackmailed by Yablosnki mob enforcer Rudolph M. Slavin. Williams has the hots for Rhonda, but is in for a nasty surprise, like her and VIP. | ||||||
gollark: In what way?
gollark: But not with MicroPython, and I don't want to write C++.
gollark: They can do BLE too, apparently.
gollark: Megabits, yes.
gollark: 256Kbps, 1Mbps or 2Mbps are options, higher data rates mean worse range or something, this information thing says "Approx. 20m [range] at 0dbm.".
External links
- V.I.P. – list of episodes on IMDb
- List of V.I.P. episodes at TV.com
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