Fool's errand

A fool's errand is a type of practical joke or prank where a newcomer to a group, typically in a professional context, is given an impossible or nonsensical task by older or more experienced members of the group. Many such errands require the victim to travel some distance and request an impossible object by name; the prank will be widely known within the peer group as an in-joke, and the person they ask for the object will play along, often by sending the victim on to make the same request elsewhere.

For other uses, see Fool's errand (disambiguation).

Hammer and Nails (1977) by Hans Godo Frabel. A "glass hammer" is an impossible object which an apprentice might be sent to fetch as part of a fool's errand

The errand is an example of a hazing ritual, through which a newcomer gains acceptance into a group.

Examples

• In North America, a fool's errand given at summer camps is a "snipe hunt".[1][2] The hunters are typically led to an outdoor spot at night and given a bag or pillowcase along with instructions that can include either waiting quietly or making odd noises to attract the creatures. The other group members leave, promising to chase the snipe toward the newcomer; instead, they return home or to camp, leaving the victim of the prank alone in the dark to discover that they have been duped and left "holding the bag".[3]
• New car salespeople are often sent to different dealerships around town to get the "lot stretcher". After reaching the new dealership, the manager informs the salesperson that it just got moved to another dealership across town, and the prank continues.[4]
• In baseball, a manager or a coach will ask a new batboy to fetch them a "box of curveballs" or "the keys to the batter's box." Major League pitcher Rick Sutcliffe would often perform this prank.[5][6]
• In the pizza-making business, newcomers are told to look in the fridge for the "dough repair kit".[7]
• Another variation includes being sent to procure a "long weight" or "long stand", the idea being that the dupe will reach the shop (or equivalent source of the mythical object) and place the request.[8] The victim is then delayed by the shopkeeper and thus receives a long wait.
• Other common restaurant practical jokes include sending the new employee to another restaurant to borrow the "bacon stretcher", "lobster food", "lobster gun", a "souffle pump", left-handed tongs, the "oven key", a left-handed broom, or a "can of steam".[9][10] An alternative prank is to instruct the new employee to empty a coffee machine or hot water tower of its water (the machine being connected to a water line and thus never able to be "emptied").
• In the decorating and construction trade, a "left-handed screwdriver", "board stretcher", "eye measures", "hammer grease", "wall expander", "glass hammer", "striped or tartan paint", "metric crescent wrench", "bucket of grinder sparks" or "box of assorted knots" are analogous pranks.[11] Another such errand subject, "polka-dot paint", became real in the 1950s with the development of a polychromatic paint which created a dotted effect when dry.[12]
• At General Electric's NELA Park plant in the 1920s, as a joke, newly hired engineers would be told to develop an inside frosted lightbulb, which the experienced engineers believed to be impossible (previous bulbs had been sandblasted for the frosting effect, which caused brittleness). In 1925, newly hired Marvin Pipkin got the assignment, and astonished his peers by succeeding.[13]
• In the United States Navy, pranks have included sending a new sailor after a "BT Punch" (a fist-punch) from a Boiler Technician who works in the Engine Room; "red lamp oil for the port running light" and "green lamp oil for the starboard running light"; a "gallon of prop wash"; and "sound-powered phone batteries".[14] Other examples are to send the dupe on a search for a "spool of water line", a "dropped gig line", a "bucket of steam", or the infamous "ID-10-T (idiot) form".[15]
• In Boy Scouts, sending a new camper after a "left handed smoke bender (or shifter)"[16], “elbow grease”, or "100 feet of shoreline" are similar practices.
• In the Czech Republic, if one breaks a spirit level, they might be asked to go and "buy a new bubble". Other construction-related jokes include buying a "brick bender",[17] "a bender straightener", or "aerosol nails".
• In the Czech Republic, a child might be sent to the pharmacy to buy some "semosel". Spelled correctly, jsem osel means "I am a fool", or literally "I am a donkey".[18][19]

See also

• List of practical joke topics

References

1. Marsh, Moira (2015). Practically Joking. Logan, UT: Utah State University Press. pp. 45–48. ISBN 0-87-421983-3.
2. Watts, Linda S. (2007). Encyclopedia of American folklore. New York, N.Y.: Facts On File. p. 206. ISBN 0-81-605699-4. snipe hunt.
3. Bronner, Simon J. (2012). Campus traditions : folklore from the old-time college to the modern mega-university. Jackson: University Press of Mississippi. p. 260. ISBN 978-1-61-703615-6.
4. "Editorial: TTAC's Guide to Car Dealer Lingo". The Truth About Cars. 2009-08-12. Retrieved 2016-12-03.
5. "Sports: A Game Of Inches". gameofinches.blogspot.com. Retrieved 6 September 2015.
6. "Eugene Register-Guard - Google News Archive Search". google.com. Retrieved 6 September 2015.
7. Aman, Reinhold (1996). Maledicta, Volume 12. Maledicta Press. p. 11.
8. Stein, Jesse Adams (2016). Hot Metal: Material Culture and Tangible Labour. Oxford University Press. ISBN 9781784994341.
9. Josefowitz, Natasha (1988). Fitting In: How to Get a Good Start in Your New Job (illustrated ed.). Addison-Wesley. p. 32. ISBN 0201116537.
10. Cameron, Kim S. (2011). The Oxford Handbook of Positive Organizational Scholarship (illustrated ed.). Oxford University Press. p. 482. ISBN 0199734615.
11. Paap, Kris (2006). Working Construction: Why White Working-Class Men Put Themselves—and the Labor Movement—in Harm's Way (illustrated ed.). Cornell University Press. p. 69. ISBN 0801472865.
12. Product Finishing, vol 15, 1950, p. 110 (google snippet)
13. "Marvin Pipkin". Schenectady Museum. Retrieved 5 September 2016.
14. Cutler, Deborah (2005). Dictionary of Naval Terms (illustrated ed.). Naval Institute Press. p. 182. ISBN 1-59114-150-8.
15. Joey D. Ossian (4 February 2004). A Marine's Lapse in Synapse: Part Ii: More Unbelievable, But True Short Stories. AuthorHouse. p. 96. ISBN 978-1-4140-4945-8.
16. Rich, Alvin (1984). The History of the BSA. Aramco Press. p. 87.
17. Matej Kobza. "Kto zaváha, naletí". munimedia.cz. Retrieved 6 September 2015.
18. "Apríl". Žena.cz, magazín pro ženy. Retrieved 6 September 2015.
19. Kutinová, Amálie. "Na prvního apríla". Gabra a Málinka, povedené dcerky. Jo! Obětovat moc na to nemóžu, ale šesták dám," hrabala Gabra honem v kapse. "Tu máš," povídala Málince, "a kup mně zaň ‚semosel‘.