The Whitest Kids U' Know

The Whitest Kids U' Know is an uncensored sketch comedy show on IFC. The cast members are Trevor Moore, Sam Brown, Zach Cregger, Timmy Williams and Darren Trumeter. They're currently most famous for the "Slow Jerk" sketch, the "Abe Lincoln" sketch (in which Abe Lincoln is a loutish boor who annoys John Wilkes Booth to the point of assassinating him), and the "New Thing" sketch, which was (without the WKUK's permission) ripped off shamelessly by Budweiser. Most of their sketches fall under the following categories: Presidential Assassinations (with Zach as Abe Lincoln/Ronald Reagan/JFK, Trevor as John Wilkes Booth/John Hinckley/Lee Harvey Oswald, Sam as George H.W. Bush/Lyndon B. Johnson, and Darren as a Secret Service officer), Drag sketches (most often with Darren or Timmy as the girl), or just plain weird ones (Saturday, Opus, etc).

They've occasionally come into conflict with the higher-ups of the Fuse Network (the censoring of swearing and sexual content led them to move the show to IFC) and even IFC (making them do 15 minute long shows rather than half hour long). But for the most part, they have full creative control of their sketches.

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Tropes used in The Whitest Kids U' Know include:

• Black Comedy: Some of their sketches are extremely dark. One quote: "Children, I have some terrible news. One of your mothers was just killed in a car accident. Who wants to guess whose mother it was for a sucker? Huh?"
  • "We have to go save 9/11!"
• The Cast Showoff: Trevor tends to get a lot of screen time compared to others.
  • Well, he is the head writer with a producers credit. And he's cute.
• Cross-Dressing Voices: Zach doesn't even bother to make his voice higher sometimes. The other guys put on a realistic, feminine voice or a goofy falsetto depending on the episode.
• The Danza: Characters played by Timmy are invariably named Timmy.
• Dead Baby Comedy: And how.
• Dude Looks Like a Lady: Darren, even though when not in drag he's pretty obviously a guy.
  • Except then there's that "Weird the Stripper" sketch... the, er, makeup job was so pinpoint perfect that the viewer was kicked to his/her death over the rim of the Uncanny Valley.
    • And the "Dog Poop" sketch which at first you really think its a real girl
  • It's pretty disturbing how convincing a lot of the guys are as women... especially Timmy, who could easily pass off as someone's mom.
• Five-Man Band (though they can shift from sketch to sketch):
  • The Hero: Trevor
  • The Lancer: Zach
  • The Smart Guy: Darren
  • The Big Guy: Sam
  • The Chick: Darren wearing a wig.
  • Tagalong Kid: Timmy, the Butt Monkey
• Getting Crap Past the Radar: Lampshaded in one sketch, in which they end the sketch by bringing out a topless woman with her breasts covered with censor bars. Trevor comments that if you buy the DVD, it won't be censored.
  • It isn't.
    • However, it doesn't work so well on IFC, where the sketch is shown uncensored.
      • It worked fine for me.
• Gosh Dang It to Heck: Trevor never really says anything worse than "bitch", while the other guys curse like sailors.
• Overly Long Gag: A lot of their sketches rely on this. "People like you think that the devil..."
• Precision F-Strike: A common technique to end a sketch. If the entire sketch has been carefully devoid of profanity, expect to see this in action.
• Refuge in Audacity: And how.
• The Reveal: Many sketches end this way. A common gag is to have a sketch go in a seemingly normal direction, until a wacky twist shows up at the end (Such as in "Jaws," or the one with the Clap On, Clap Off Rasta Drummer)
• Sassy Black Woman: One reoccurring character is a fat black woman who usually says "oh HELLLL no!" when outraged.
• Suspiciously Similar Song: The opening song is this (bordering on an unofficial cover version) of "Little Pad" by The Beach Boys.
  • Let's Wake Up the Neighbors is a Suspiciously Similar Song version of Daddy Yankee's Gasolina

Specific sketches from The Whitest Kids U Know give examples of:

• Accidentally Accurate: Possibly, or possibly Shown Their Work. In "Gallon of PCP", Trevor "didn't even know [PCP] came in liquid form," to which Zach replies, "Science." Liquid PCP does in fact exist, and is yellowish as shown in the show.
• Affectionate Parody: "Sam in a Bag" was a parody of AfterschoolSpecials. Don't take pots, kids.
• Aggressive Negotiations: A company merger just wouldn't be complete without a sniper, assault rifles, flash bombs, and a mortar round.
• Alien Autopsy: One sketch sees a team of doctors at Area 51 beginning to perform one such autopsy on an alien corpse recovered from Roswell.
• Anachronism Stew: The opening narration of one sketch describes American forces closing in on Nazi President Adolf Hitler at Christmastime in 1944. As they are about to break into the bunker, one soldier shouts out "We're comin' to getcha, ya Jew bastard!" They then find Charlie Chaplin inside. He distracts them with his shenanigans, then takes one of their bolt-action rifles and fires it like a machine gun. Hitler then thanks his "Best Friend" for saving his life once again.^[1]
• Author Filibuster: The "Backseat" sketch points out how socialism is really the most beneficial form of government as it treats all people equally, while capitalism teaches the exact opposite of the principles of every religion in the world while playing on man's flaws. The joke is that this is what sets off the driver.
• Berserk Button: "PIZZA'S NOT FOR BREAKFAST!"
• Big No: In "Give Me The Guns"
• Bilingual Bonus: The Vietnamese in "Asian Hooker" hides a couple of funny lines.
• Black Comedy Rape:
  • "I'M GONNA TIE YOU TO THE RADIATOR GRAPE YA IN THE MOUTH! OKAY, WHEN I'M FINISHED GRAPING YOU, I'M GONNA GO UPSTAIRS AND I'M GONNA GRAPE YOUR MOTHER, AND THEN YOUR FATHER, AND THEN I'M GOING TO TAKE YOUR WHOLE FAMILY DOWN TO THE BASEMENT, AND GRAPE YOU ALL FOR DECADES AND DECADES AND DECADES AND DECAAAAADES!"
  • "We gon' make love until you wake up..."
  • Gandalf sketch
• Cluster F-Bomb: Abraham Lincoln
  • "Halloweiner"
• Completely Missing the Point: This Sketch mixed with Too Dumb to Live and Artistic License: Biology.
• Department of Redundancy Department: "Abraham Lincoln was actually hammered in the ass so much... that he died from being hammered in the ass."
• Did Not Do the Research: The tattoo parlor sketch where a man charges into the parlor drunk and demands a tattoo or "Bowser from Super Mario Bros. TWO!!!" 2 is one of the few games in the series that doesn't even feature Bowser. (and it's safe to assume he's not referring to The Lost Levels).
  • I assumed that was a case of They Plotted a Perfectly Good Waste, since he's drunk, after all. The joke worked on me at least.
  • A lot of 18th century sketches humorously take place in 1776, even in sketches where this wouldn't make sense (such as the one with Francis Scott Key, who wasn't even born until 3 years after 1776).
  • Ironically, the one sketch that actually should take place in 1776 ("The Declaration of Independence", natch), instead takes place in the 17th century.
• Drop the Cow: A sketch where the boys continue to list off strip-clubs (with increasingly disturbing names) is interrupted by the producer, who says that the sketch has no point. And then he starts listing more puns.
• Drugs Are Bad
• Erotic Asphyxiation
• Everything's Better with Dinosaurs: Like gettin' high. "You're welcome... Internet."
  • Horses are also turned on by stegosauruses.
• Everything's Worse With Bears Wearing Bulletproof Vests: "Is that what you want? Invincible bears runnin' around, rapin' your churches, burnin' your women?"
• Far Side Island: "Island Cannibal" sketch
• Fridge Logic: Invoked, in regards to the ending of The Lord of the Rings.
• Gag Boobs: Darren as Weird the Stripper.
• Godwin's Law of Time Travel: Parodied. Apparently, just resetting your internet history is enough for Nazi zeppelins and Nazi dinosaurs with laser eyes to appear.
• The Grim Reaper: Stumbles around making guttural animal noises, before devouring dead bodies and then depositing them in coffins... the hard way.
• IKEA Weaponry: a sniper has a company supervisor pinned down. Said supervisor assembles a sniper rifle from a briefcase, uses an intern as bait, and kills the opposing sniper.
  • justified, he was using a Blaser R93 Tactical 2, a takedown rifle.
• I Reject Your Reality: A sketch had a man and his family screaming at the viewers about how they live in garbage because his daughter forgot to bow to "His Holiness". Turns out to be some crazy guy who hangs around a bakery. The employees and the police are familiar with him, but that time he had a little kid with him.
• It Belongs in a Museum: "Dr. Jones, Sit down!"
• Naughty Birdwatching: From the "Peeping Toms" sketch.
• No Indoor Voice
• Noodle Implements: The boys read off a Long List of items that viewers should donate to make funnier sketches, each getting progressively more disturbing.

"...a horny elephant...a hot zebra...zebra beer...elephant condoms...a huge bed..."

• Only Sane Man: One of the executives from "The Grapist"
• Playing Pictionary: One sketch is about a kid named Kevin, who shows his parents a picture he drew that looks like a penis, and then explains to them that it's an elephant.
• Punny Name: "Dr. Peppers", " Mr.Dr. Pibbs", and "General Mills" from the Alien Autopsy sketch.
• Sadist Teacher: One sketch had a teacher making her students guess which one of their mothers had just died in a car crash. It follows with asking how long it took for her to die, how long it took to get her body out of the car, and that the kid, Joey, will most likely die in the streets. The teacher then chides Joey for not participating, and when asked to act out his mom's last moments, tells him "the demons in hell are probably laughing at your mom for what a piss poor actor her son is."
  • Turns out it was another kid whose mom died. The teacher just really hates Joey.
• Screw This, I'm Outta Here: The reporter in "Kid Beer", after announcing there's now beer for babies tosses her microphone behind her and walks off camera in disgust.
• "Seen It All" Suicide: A variation in "Kid Beer".
• Sex Bot: SEX ROBOT, SEX ROBOT. is supposed to be one, but really does nothing other than annoy and terrify people with its dancing.
• Stealth Pun: In "Alien Autopsy", the alien turns out to be a piñata. In other words, a Mexican alien.
• Suddenly Sexuality: In the sketch "Feeler Doc", a doctor frets about the possibility of turning gay immediately after checking his patient's balls for a lump. He does.
• Stupid Crooks: One skit is about a group of would-be bank robbers who repeatedly fail the same criminal plot over and over for many different reasons, ranging from not being able to read the bank's blueprints, bringing friends from out of town along to the robbery, and posting plans to rob the bank on a blog (along with a hyperlink to the bank's website wherever the word "bank" is used).
• Take That: "That's right: Ozzfest--not affected by the abduction of all the world's smart people."
• That Makes Me Feel Angry: "She shaved her vagina hair! That is so attractive to me!"
• Too Soon: On a hunting trip, Trevor repeatedly makes jokes about a friend who died in a hunting accident... yesterday.
• Totem Pole Trench: Taken to the ridiculous extreme, considering Trevor and Sam are both over six feet tall.
• Unusually Uninteresting Sight: One sketch has a father calmly explaining to his son about the cycle of life and death after his hamster dies... while the horrified son is watching the Grim Reaper devour the hamster's body with his bare hands.
• You Can See Me?? (only words of sketch)
• Your Head Asplode

1. ↑ While Hitler was a fan of The Tramp, Chaplin was a Communist of Jewish descent who hated Hitler (The Great Dictator being one of the greatest Take That's ever).