Vince Offer

/wiki/Vince Offercreator

"Hi, it's Vince with ShamWow!"
"Hi, it's Vince with Slap Chop!"
"Hey, it's Vince with Eminem's new album 'Recovery'!"

Vince Offer (born Offer Shlomi, עוֹפﬧ שלוֹמי) made quite an impression hawking the Shamwow towel and immortalizing the line, "You followin' me, camera guy?" If he had only one commercial under his belt he could easily be dismissed as a one-hit wonder. But Vince soon returned in a new commercial for Slap Chop, where he cheerfully informs us that we will love his nuts. The internet indeed loves him and occasionally gets creative about it. Then, in 2012, he made his triumphant return with the Schticky.

By coincidence, bears an uncanny resemblance to Team Fortress 2's Scout. Which was quickly acknowledged in the game.

Offer provides examples of the following:
  • Arch Enemy: Billy Mays. Not only were they rivals as popular pitchmen, but Mays also accused Offer of plagiarizing demos and promoting inferior products.
  • Ascended Meme: The Rap Chop and Jamwow music videos are now used as television commercials, with copyrighted material replaced with footage of dancers in bizarre costumes.
  • Bread, Eggs, Milk, Squick: "You'll use it in the house. You'll use it in the car. You can also use it at the beach. And at your dad's funeral. Now, you'll have an exciting life!"
  • Breathless Non-Sequitur: Tons of it, especially in the Slap-Chop ad.
  • Captain Obvious: Thanks Vince, we wouldn't have noticed that onion skin without that zoom in. And the arrow. And he still has the nerve to ask, "You see that?"
  • Dead Baby Comedy: Underground Comedy is made of this.
  • Double Entendre: "You're gonna love my nuts." Given that he does the same joke with the eggs in the Spanish version (huevos being both the word for "eggs" and a slang for the testes), it's very unlikely that the "nuts" line was accidental.
    • With the Schticky, it's "Problem with that shedding pussy?".
      • It's not just that, it's basically the whole commercial. "Hey Vince! Oh, you're playing with your Schticky, I'm sorry." "You're gonna like the little Schticky, but you're gonna LOVE the big Schticky!" "It's slippery when wet...sticky when dry." And so on.
  • Everyone Calls Him "Barkeep": It's easy to find people who have never heard of Vince Offer because they only know him as the "Shamwow Guy."
  • Faux Fluency: Instead of dubbing his ads into Spanish, he re-recorded them with him doing the pitch in Spanish. The sentences are rather simplified, but the essence is still there.
  • Iconic Item: The headset, if not the merchandise.
  • If You Call Before Midnight Tonight: "Because you know we can't do this all day."
  • Large Ham: His saving grace. The products he hawks are crap, but it's just so much fun to watch him.
  • Meaningful Name: Vince Offer. He's a salesman.
  • Motor Mouth: The Camera Guy can't even follow him.
  • Onion Tears: Defied in the Slap Chop commercial.
  • Rapid-Fire Comedy: Due to the speed at which he's doing his sales pitches, it's easy to miss a few of the jokes the first time around.
  • Self-Deprecation: His latest ad on Enimem's Recovery CD mocks his own sales pitch.
    • The Schticky ad states that it can come through even when you aren't at your best, and simulates a mug shot being taken [1].
    • After demonstrating the cleaning ability of "InVinceable", he comments "If only all of my problems went away this easily!"
  • Stupid Statement Dance Mix:
  • This Loser Is You: Most of the Slapchop advert. "You see this tuna? This tuna is boring. Stop having a boring tuna, stop having a boring life."

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  1. ↑ he was arrested in 2009 for beating up a hooker
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