Old Harry's Game/Funny

• Satan: "We’re averaging 25 suicide bombers a day. Here, you should see their faces when they get here and it’s not paradise. Sometimes, for a laugh, you know, I get Scumspawn to put on a dress and tell them he’s a virgin. Which he is, come to think of it. And always will be. As he has no genitalia."
• On a similar note, a suicide bomber, who had only blown up himself: "But if I had succeeded, I would be in paradise, yes? The Supreme Leader told me ... The Supreme Leader's full of crap, isn't he?"
• Scumspawn's many failed transformations. He goes for Cthonic monstrosity, he gets giant prawn. On a bed of lettuce. And on several occasions he turns himself into an electric lawnmower.