Life (TV series)/Quotes

From "Evil...and His Brother Ziggy", a Crowning Moment of Funny illustrating the Crime-Time Soap aspects of the show:

Charlie: Ted...is this curry?
Ted: You don't like it, is it too spicy?
Charlie: Indian food? [glances at American Indian Capt. Whitehat]
Ted: It was a coincidence, I just grabbed the first menu!
Capt. Whitehat: How long have you two been together?
Charlie: Since we met in prison.
Ted: But we're not...together.
[Rachel sits down and glares at Charlie.]
Capt. Whitehat: This isn't your daughter?
Charlie: No. She's "not" my niece. And there's "not" a boy "not" playing a guitar at the other end of a phone call.
Rachel: That's exactly right, there's not.
Charlie: Look, Rachel, I was worried.
Rachel: No, he was worried [points at Ted], you were gone. I came home, you weren't here; I called, you didn't pick up.
Charlie: I was in the middle of nowhere!
Capt. Whitehat: By that he means my home.
Rachel: You come and go. [storms off]
Ted: I'm in love with Olivia. Charlie, I'm in love with the woman who's going to marry your father. [storms off]
Charlie: White people.
Capt. Whitehat: Pass the vindaloo?

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