Hitler's Time Travel Exemption Act/Quotes
Pierre Chang (talking about the Orchid): It will allow us to manipulate time.
Pierre Chang: Don't be ridiculous. There are rules.
DHARMA Workman: And then what, you're going to go back in time and kill Hitler?—Lost
"Time travel and Hitlers are always a bad combination."
"Time travelers! You can go back in time and fuck Hitler, but you can't kill him!"—Unknown
"Also, don't kill Hitler, even if it really seems like a good idea. Just trust me on this one."—tailsteak.com, Basic Time Travel Etiquette
11/21/2104
All right; that's it. Having just returned from 1907 Vienna where I secured the expulsion of Hitler from the Academy by means of an elaborate prank involving the Prefect, a goat, and a substantial quantity of olive oil, I now turn my attention to our newer brethren, who, despite rules to the contrary, seem to have no intention of reading Bulletin 1147 (nor its Addendum, Alternate Means of Subverting the Hitlerian Destiny, and here I'm looking at you, SneakyPete). Permit me to sum it up and save you the trouble: no Hitler means no Third Reich, no World War II, no rocketry programs, no electronics, no computers, no time travel. Get the picture?
At 02:21:30, SneakyPete wrote:
Vienna, 1907: after numerous attempts, have infiltrated the Academy of Fine Arts and facilitated Adolf Hitler's admission to that institution. Goodbye, Hitler the dictator; hello, Hitler the modestly successful landscape artist! Brought back a few of his paintings as well, any buyers?
At 02:29:17, SilverFox316 wrote:
"Shoot the dictator and prevent the war? But the dictator is merely the tip of the whole festering boil of social pus from which dictators emerge; shoot one, and there'll be another one along in a minute. Shoot him too? Why not shoot everyone and invade Poland?"
3 Possibilities:
C: Future people are really bad at killing Hitler
A: Time travel is impossible
B: Future people are dicks
Jane Goodall: We have an alternate history, and time travelers are all over the place.
Steve Irwin: And we've killed a dozen Hitlers already! We're winning!
"Ever wondered what a parallel universe you might be like? Well, stop wondering, because you’re just Hitler. Every parallel universe ever. You. Hitler. We can’t figure it out. Anyway, if you meet him in the next test, don’t kill him. I know, I know. But trust me, it’d be bad."—Unused Cave Johnson line, Portal 2
Amateur time travelers kill Hitler.
Professional time travelers kill Princip.
Expert time travelers kill Rousseau.—"Randyman"
Spock: It's the First Law of Time Travel.
Kirk: Which is?
Spock: Time travel: ergo, Hitler.